Flatmates help

[~Jo~]

Hey, We've just come back to the flat after the xmas break. I never really got on with my flatmates to start with. They said in the first semester that I was a freak and they didnt include me in stuff they did together. but Im missing home and it just makes it harder wen theyr so nasty without really doing anything...i duno if its just me.

simple things lyk i'll walk into a room and smile and say hi, but theyl just luk at me. Or I'll walk into the room and not say anything in the hope that theyl say hi, and they still just look at me. They keep me up all nite with their drunkeness. theyr outside my door screaming and shouting at each other while they know im trying to sleep, and I've said nicely, and not nicely, for them to keep the noise down but I just feel lyk im spoiling their fun. But I need my sleep, my course is 9-5 everyday, and theyr just in a few hours a week. its not fair. but they could at least be civil?

[griddlebone]

God,ive had this same problem. I had the worst housemates,they were nosiy and never cleaned up etc and it upset me so much. If theyre making an unbareable amount of noise,you can report them to the community police....but i suggest you try and talk to them first and if that fails talk to the people in charge of where you live.xx

[Bleeding Angel]

if its uni accomidation you are in speak to the uni accomidation officer, and they should be able to help.

but yeah ive been there too, severl times, so if you ever want to talk jus pm :)

[Stellata]

I would suggest you see your accommodation officer and ask for a move. You don't have to live with this.

[Tanya B]

Are you living in the halls on campus? If yes, is there any chance you could switch flats? I know there's already been lots of people swapping flats here - you could try speaking to someone at the accommodation block and see if it would be ok for you to advertise your room, and see if anyone was interested in a switch? Sometimes people just clash for whatever reasons, but these people shouldn't be making your life this miserable. You have every right to be happy wherever you live. Try sitting them down and speaking to them again mdear, but if they don't listen you should seriously consider talking to someone at your accommodation/registration block and see what can be done. I truly hope things get better for you x

[~Jo~]

We've talked before, and thats wen they said they thought I was a freak and didnt understand me, so they just avoid me altogether. I dont want to move, cos what If I get put with worse people, and I like the position the flats in, I can escape easily to the gym etc. but i just think its not nice. Cos I know Im not a horrible person, Im not horrible to them. I dont see why they have so much fun shopping together and going out etc, and Im the one thats the inconvenience. :(

[Tanya B]

IF you decided to switch flats, maybe you could check out the new flat/flatmates before you agree to move in, so you're sure they aren't the same? You're in no way a horrible person, these people sound as if they're being very unreasonable towards you. Have you thought about maybe trying to invite them out somewhere? Maybe if you bit the bullet and asked them to go somewhere with you, they'd get to see how wrong they were about you?

I know moving flat isn't the ideal option, but if things continue I think you'd be better off elsewhere. This is very unfair on you - you have just as much right to be there as they do, and nobody likes to be ignored or left out. Speak to someone from the uni and see what options you have mdear. You're doing so well in sticking it out so far, you really are.

[~Jo~]

thank u. In the first semester I did do things with them, I went shopping or for lunch with them, and it just still felt the same, they would walk ahead, or "lose me" conviently, or talk amoungst themselves and id try and talk too and theyd talk over me. Its not nice not knowing wot im supposed to have done. or what theyr problem is with me. as far as I know they just dont understand me and arent willing to let themselves like me. I duno if Its cos i dont luk and dress the way they do or wot. Iv gone through so many things in my head. i just dont understand

[Sans Peur]

I hopeyou get the stuff sorted out with your flatemates. i understand how you are feeling

jane x

[Heidi Tiger]

Hey,
I understand how you are feeling as I've pretty much just had all-out war declared on me by one flatmate in particular.
However last year I was in halls. When people asked for a move, they got asked which hall they wanted to go to, then if there was a space there they got given an appointment slip so they could go see it first, check out the people etc. You were not obliged to accept the first room offered to you, you waited until you found one you were happy with. If you are lucky, your uni may have a similar system.
take care
xxx

[Bleeding Angel]

i moved flats and it was the best choice i made, i was so much happier.

If you decide to move flats you can ask to meet the new people before you move in, see how they are and stuff.

i do think its one of the best choices you can make

[random.swirls]

I agree with seeing about moving in to another flat.

Do you have friends who arenmt in your halls and can you invite them over and so on. It sucks not liking where you live but you can make the best of a bad situation by going out and doing things with others so you at least enjoy yourself.
xxoxx

[joyous broken thing]

i would try to move flats if it's possible, its not fair on you at all.
are their people in nearby accomodation or on your cousre you get on with? if so, try to spend more time with them- remind yourself that there are nice people around.
a friend on my course doesn't get on with any of her 8flatmates but she remidies it by spending as much time as she can with people on the course and their friends.
i really hope it gets sorted for you! xxx

[x-dying-inside-x]

i would look into moving hunny.