you said you'd always be there for me no matter what!!! i did everything for you and still would!!! all i asked was to meet up next weekend, i was even going to pick you up!!! but you changed your mind and made other plan!!! any wonder why i dont open up to you anymore... wonder what you'd say if you found out...
you probably wouldnt give a **** just like the rest of them!!!
Promise me you'll see my tears when i cry... Because right now you dont see me at all...
im sorry.
i need you at the moment more than ever but you have your own **** to be dealing with.
ive lost my father in law and all i got from you was im sorry but im thinking of myself for once.
i have always told you to think of yourself, i never ask too much of you. but when this happens and i need you, you cant be here for me and that hurts.....i dont blame you for thinking of yourself i really dont, you have urges too. but i dont want your support for that. i want your support because he's dead gone. and you cant give me that.
im sorry.
really i am
i love you but this is killing me.
im thinking of going home to leeds, but if i do i know you wont cope.
im sorry.
What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself.
I wish you'd realise the more i push you away, the further i get from you, the more i shout and get angry, the more i storm off and get upset, its a sign that im reaching the end, and i dont know how much longer im gonna last. i wish just one of you knew because im ruining myself in more ways than one and i really dont care anymore.
please help me...
why can't you just leave me alone.EVerytime I think I've got you out of my life you show up again.I don't need you and I never will.I'll never forgive you for what you did
Its not that Im jealous. Im not. Im just afraid Im going to lose you. Scared you'll go back to her. I know shes with someone else but that doesnt stop my paranoia. I just don't want to lose you. I love and care about you so much. I know Ive done things in the past and Im sorry. I just don't want you to leave. Im scared baby. I really really am. I know I prob have no reason to be. And I don't want you to be mad at me for this but please.... I need all the reasurrance I can get that Im not going to lose you. And I know this might scare you and make you back off...
but Im falling in love with you. Thats what scares me most. I didnt think it could happen this quickly.. but it has. Please don't make me lose that. Please?
Last edited by Warrior_x : 25-08-2007 at 07:29 PM.
Reason: Spelling mistake
Thank you for telling me that stuff..
I know it must have helped you and I know it must have been hard to say it..
I really appreciate you decided to tell me. It makes things so much more clear.. It lets me understand you more..
Though I have to say it's pretty hard sometimes.. You know I have my own problems too.. you just don't know what they are 'cause I'm too scared to tell most of them.. I wish that one day I'll be brave/strong enough to tell you everything..
I wish that some day I will be more like you..
when you ask me mum if i'm ok, i lie because i won't be ok till my problems are over
and i cant keep up your wish that i stop listening to rock music and forget about the bands who have helped me aswell as you have....they have made me who i am today .....
sorry
I've had another email. It's nothing major which is why I haven't told you, but it's there all the same.
Mum's hit me again. Again nothing major, but it was enough to upset me and want to cut. I didn't though, because I wont let you down.
Years ago you said i was to sensitive and emotional. Well not any more and it comes at a greater price than you can imagine. I will never forgive you, either of you. I was only child and you were my parents. You should have helped me up not knocked me down.
You probably don't understand, most people don't. You will never understand how much anger, how much self-hatred someone must have to take a razor to themselves and cut into their own skin.
If that's how you want to play it, then fine. But it would have been nice to at least have *told* me.
I mean, talk about a u-turn in feelings. How the hell was I to have seen it coming? And I'm sorry if I've been being annoying, but I didn't know. Obviously it's pretty patently obvious now because you're not speaking to me, but y'know. But fine - if you don't care, that's how we'll play it. ****.
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