Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Thread

[KeepLosingMyWay*]

hi,
i'm not sure if i have ocd or mayb just a mild form.
Erm where to start...
I feel like 'bad' things i do, like sins could make 'bad' things happen, like sex ect..
i have intrusive thoughts of 'bad things' which could happen and 'bad' impulses, the impulses not so much now, but the thoughts are.
It's tied to religion a bit, christianity.. i pray every night, and i dont feel safe if i dont. When i pray i obsess over everything, and say stuff like 'im sorry for my sins..' over and over while thinking of all the 'bad' things iv'e done during the day, even stuff like 'being selfish' & ask god to watch over every one ect. I dread going to bed sometimes because i obsess and dont feel safe if i dont pray right.
So obviously that isn't a normal way to pray. i think i have always beleived in god. But i never used to pray much.

I used to have thoughts about safety too, and still often get urges to check plugs ect, like if i go downstairs before i go to bed i check eveything.

I try to put off going to bed, and i hardly sleep at night anymore, mostly in the day.

im just sick of being preoccupied with all these 'bad things' which could happen. I worry over peoples safety everyday.

[Carla_x]

Hey. :)

It does sound like a form of OCD, or at least some kind of anxiety. I do know what you mean about the praying thing... at one point during the phase of my OCD being very bad, I would apologise to God for everything I could think of, and thank him because I was scared of losing things or bad things happening.

Have you thought about seeing a GP, or do you feel you don't need to? *hugs*

[KeepLosingMyWay*]

im the same.
I keep thinking about seeing the gp, for this an other things.. depression ect. At the moment i keep telling myself i best not go because of swine flue!

[KeepLosingMyWay*]

how did you stop youself from feeling the need to pray about those things?
I try shortening my prayers down a little but its hard sometimes i just make them longer again without thinking lol

[Carla_x]

I think sometimes I tried to make myself busy so I either forgot or was simply really tired by the time I prayed. I guess after a while that part of my OCD phased out because my belief in God was wavering.

Seeing a GP would definitely be a good idea I think, it definitely made me feel a lot better and lead to me getting therapy and medication - my OCD is a lot more manageable now. :)

[Serenade]

I used to have really really bad OCD with a lot of things, at the time i never even realised and wondered why i was really struggling with things, it was terrible. Obviously i still have a couple of things i'm working on, but i'm so much better than i was, people should never underestimate the effect OCD can have on a person. *hugs to everyone* ^^

[Only Distraction]

My latest compulsion: washing my hands. I am now a compulsive hand washer.

[Enelya]

I've had it for more than a decade now. And seriously: it sucks.
Sometimes I wonder what it must be like... to have a life without OCD?
I'm better now, but I still seem to be slipping all the time...
Mine is especially concentrated on learning and reading.
So not good, as I'm training to be a bookseller. (It's an apprentice-thingy here in Austria.)
I think, before I gotta go to that apprenticeship-College, I'm gonna quit. My job. Or my life.
Not really decided yet.

Wow... That was honest.
Suppose, 'cause no-one cares either way.

[Oliviaface]

I'm new here.

I went to a party last weekend, and people started trashing the house. People throwing eggs at the walls, tipping everything, spraying ketchup on coats, cutting hair and leaving it everywhere. All sorts. Of course, after a few drinks, it was all spiraling out of control, and I started going mad, cleaning and crying, and getting really angry. I threw everyone out of the house and spent hours tidying, and then scrubbing everything in bleach, including my hands :/

Now everyone who was there is referring to me as 'crazy psycho bitch.'
I just don't want to be like this anymore. I don't want to be different. I don't want to be a freak.

[[Fog]]

Hey guys, sorry I haven't been around for so long. I've changed meds and I've been trying to deal with the side effects/ withdrawal symptoms. I think my anxiety levels have got even worse and I have that horrible dark obsessive feeling so strongly at the moment.

Fallen Fairy - sorry to hear things are so hard for you but it's nice to know I'm not alone with the praying thing. I have been a Christian all my life and have had OCD all my life as well, so for as long as I remember my prayers have been obsessive. OCD is intrusive anyway but I find it very frustrating with prayer. I don't really have any advice because I don't know how to stop it myself but just to say I really understand and I hope you can overcome it. Whatever happens God understands what's going on in our heads

Enelya - I often try to imagine a life without OCD. My family therapist often asks me to imagine life without my mental problems and to be honest I have no idea what it would be like. I think I'd probably have a lot more space in my head to concentrate on what's going on and on other people and what they are saying. I dunno I really can't imagine it! I think I'd even miss it sometimes.

Radiohead - really sorry to hear about what happened at the party. OCD is hard but it's even worse when it gets out of control in public. I hope everyone forgets about it quickly and please don't beat yourself up about it. You're not a freak or a crazy psycho bitch at all

I hope everyone is doing ok xxx

[Chloe.]

banana89- I'm sorry your anxiety is at a high level right now. Have you talked to your psych about it?

Man...my ocd is so out of control right now. I had my first day of summer school yesterday and I couldn't do it. I was getting off task. Counting, thinking about stuff, looking around the room. I couldn't take it. I had to tell the teacher. She pulled me aside and called my mom. My mom yelled at me. After school, I went to my therapist and we went through all of my ocd symptoms that I have. Damn...I have a lot. My only choice was to drop the summer school class. I'll have to make it up another time. I'm so disappointed in myself for doing that. :/ Sorry, I just had to vent a little.

[Cryptic.]

So, my OCD is really getting bad.
I keep getting obsessive, bad thoughts.
I feel like it's me thinking these things.
Like I'm a bad, shallow, horrible, evil person.
I have "confessed" 3 of these thoughts, but more are coming and they won't go away.
I feel like I need to confess them for them to go away.
But then more will come.

Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
OCD IS SO FRUSTRATING AND HORRIBLE!
WHY THE HECK DO I HAVE THIS STUPID ILLNESS/DISORDER?!
I HATE IT!
What if I don't even have it?!
What if it's just me?!
I'm so bad.
URGH.

[Chloe.]

Sarah, you're not a bad person at all.
This isn't you.
It's the ocd.
Sorry, I don't have much advice.
I'm here for you, dear. (:

[Cryptic.]

Thank you hon. *cuddles* I appreciate it...x

[Puck]

Mines got seriously worse with the swine flu epidemic... I'm washing with detol soap as well as antibacterial shampoo and i've got hand sanitiser next to the front door, kitchen, bathroom and my room as well as carrying a portable one for going out. I use it after touching anything and i have anti-bacterial wetwipes to clean door handles >< and letter boxes its frustrating! Then im frantically cleaning the kitchen (and doing washing up) and bathroom (my bedrooms always clean) and i keep giving the animals baths... i'm really hated at the moment!

[Chloe.]

I'm sorry, meg meg. Well, it's good that you're protecting yourself from the germs. It seems to be bothering you, though. I'm sorry...I don't have any advice. I'm here for you, meg. (:

[Cryptic.]

Well, they say swine flu is milder than the actual seasonal flu, and it only seriously affects those who have underlying health conditions. I've been ill since December, and before getting ill, my immune system was, and is, quite bad, so I understand the worry and concerns over it, I have it too, I'm even scared to go out and I try to keep to myself more so than I used to before this was turned into another scenario like the Bird Flu. I'm so worried of catching it and dying from it. It's ridiculous how much the press has over dramatized it and scaring us all.

[Puck]

Thanks chloe :) am here for you too x. 'Pup' like yourself i am very prone and vulnerable to illness im so.. dosed up and i miss one pill my mum will threaten that i'll die of swine flu in some sort of prolonged speach describing in detail what will happen ¬¬.. 'thanks mum' I know my resistance is low anyway and i just want to prevent it as much as possible and my whole family are diagnosed with numerous health problems and crap and the NHS are stating cases will soar during autumn/ winter (duh!) and well i'll be in college and yeah basically i just dont want to get it! But its frustrating.. my mum takes the mick out of my anxieties and well yeah she just doesnt want me to be even more of a screw up by getting more diagnosis'

[Cryptic.]

Well, the press has hyped up this swine flu, so it may be getting to her as well.

I fear for those who I'm close to getting it & dying. I fear catching it myself and dying. The press hyping it up and the fact I'm being told it could mutate and get worse is not making any of this better; just worse. So, I can really relate.x

(Btw Pup is a nickname of mine, and I love it, hence it being my name, so you know, feel free to call me Sarah though if you don't like to use it.)

[Puck]

Thanks Sarah ^_^ hope you're coping enough at the moment, take care of yourself hun x