once again that feeling is back.. i was feeling better b ut something set off my mind and now its back i have what i need.. im so irrational with things right now.. ugh this is so just annoying sometimes i just dont want to deal with all this i have no self worth i have nothing to look for anymore
I am not doing it for myself, I am doing it for them!
Love and miss them like crazy
im sick of talking, i just dont think anyone can feel the pain i feel the hole in my heart is so deep it burns me to the core and i cant make it through i could pull the trigger if i wanted to but something is telling me just wait but im too close
Last edited by EmilyTHEgreat : 15-06-2011 at 05:22 AM.
Reason: i like my signature
I am not doing it for myself, I am doing it for them!
Love and miss them like crazy
Demons to some. There's always hope for change. Please don't give up hope. Can you make some changes in your life? I have no idea what your life is like.... I know we struggle with different things. Can you reach out somewhere for support? Are you dealing with this hopelessness alone? Please don't go it alone. Hug
I've been referred for therapy, but there's a 5 months waiting list, I have a CPN who I see but haven't seen her in a while and everytime I call her to make an appointment she makes an excuse, like not having her diary, and says she'll call me back. But she hasn't. Kinda makes me feel like no one else is bothered so why should I bother. I don't feel quite so awful today, thank you for your kind words, I hope you're okay.
Oops. I hit post by mistake. Demons to some I was going to say I'm sorry about your CPN. She should be better than that. It's not your fault. I'm glad you are feeling a little better. Please take care. Keep reaching out. Don't let anything bad happen to you.
I'm feeling kinda crappy today. Very discouraged. Trying to keep my chin up. Thanks for asking. I just want to cry. I'm frustrated.
SilentBob. I'm glad you're still reaching out. Please don't go through with it. Can you make another step? Call a helpline or go to the hospital please.... Don't kill yourself. It's worth trying another day, and another. You are worth it. Don't give up. We are here for you.
My lovely people... Love you all and do need to reach out when you feel like this and are really considering going through. Cant hurt. Only elp. I would miss you all for sure and I care! So do others,hard to see when youre struggling and and keeping it to yourself. Im always just a pm away for anything! Stay safe and take care my beautiful/handsome friends.
These kicks take me far away my dear; Far away from myself Far away from my troubles
Far away from heaven
I got sacked from a shelf stacking job, minimum wage :(
Starting a degree in September but its a waste of time. I can't get a job because I'm too scared and clumsy and I can't speak to humans.
I'm just a disappointment to everyone. I used to think I was good at some things but I must have been mistaken. I've ruined my life.
Youve not ruined your life. Still time to change and turn it around. Arent a disappointment to me and everybody is good at something (that lies on the positive side). Sorry you got sacked. Couls you change the degree? Why is the degree a waste of time?
These kicks take me far away my dear; Far away from myself Far away from my troubles
Far away from heaven
I've already changed my degree. I was doing Physics for 2 yrs, but I'm starting Wildlife + Zoo biology in September...
I just don't think anyone will ever employ me. I can hardly speak, literally...
Plus I'm not strong enough to be good at manual labour - I didn't really think of that when I applied for the new course.
I wish I had a diagnosable illness, but I just have SA and SM, which don't get me any unemployment benefits. At the moment I'm not even getting Jobseekers Allowance. :( If my partner dies I will starve to death.
Do you talk to your partner about any of this, your job or suicidal feeling?
Iff I could I would employ you (though id need to be in position to employ someone first...) Im sure what youre entering doesnt cntain constant hard manaul labor. *offers hugs*itll get better. i promise. talk to your partner if you havent. cant hurt to tell someone.
These kicks take me far away my dear; Far away from myself Far away from my troubles
Far away from heaven
But you were born for a purpose and everyone has a place and purpose in the world, if you weren't here, things would be knocked out of balance. PLus a whole ton of people would be devastated (dont say they wouldn't). You cna do this, just keep fighting.
I shouldn't have been born... My parents should have let me die when I was a baby... 
