Sorry I hope you don't mind me messaging you, but noticed that it says you're on the thread. Just wanted to see if you're ok after last night. Hope you're ok.
x
And you're my obsession, I love you to the bones...
****kin my rant just vanished, so will start again.....
Okay, went to doctors earlier (cycled 4.5 round trip) and yeah that damn near killed me but aye. Doctors were not happy to give me a weeks worth of meds and not happy with me going abroad whilst I am vulnerable, after 20 minutes of debating which included 2 doctors and me, they were like okay well get written consent from your sister she will give you them daily, managed to talk round that and in the end they relented and gave me the scipt for a week, promised I would stay safe etc etc....
I was planning to cycle to chemist as well, as I had to change my venlafaxine tablets, but my legs were jelly after my initial cycle so I walked there which is about a mile from my docs, got there just before it shut, got my venlafazine changed and now my doctors had phoned the chemist about my new script, so they asked for it and it wasn't there...
Fukkin prescription fell out my pocket somewhere, tried to find it on way back by tracing steps, to no avail...
I am going to need to phone the drs tomoz now and tell them this, but with the reluctance to give me it in the first place, what if they think I have put it in another chemist, and I am just scheming to od? I know thats what is going to probably happen, I can only hope its been handed in or something, coz if they dont give me them, then im fukked really, I will need to hit the wine when I am away to sleep, which I dont wanna do you know.
ANyhow, after that walked back to doctors, thought I would never be able to cycle home, thought would be more like a walk with the bike, but surprisingly I managed it back home, so proud I did that.
Went to WW, lost a slight amount but not much but that was to be expected as I been drinking and eating a lot so, I do need to try harder though.
Finally, I have a pain in my chest(posted fa) and its sore and thats about all i can say, i dont know if its exercise realted or not...
I am planning to get up early tomorrow and walk to work, think cycling is a bit too much yet for work and i dont like cycling on the road atm as i aint been on a bike a lot recently, and i know i shouldnt cycle on the pavement but i did so shoot me, it was rush hour traffic :(
Hope everyone else is doing okay x
Last edited by Hollz : 29-04-2010 at 09:41 PM.
Something has changed within me, something is not the same, I'm through with playing by the rules of someone elses game. Too late for second guessing, too late to go back to sleep, its time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap....
Somethings I cannot change, but till I try I'll never know...
***
Big hugs to all my friends on here, thanks for your constant support - love you guys
first of all you DID lose weight! doesnt matter how much you lost so well done!
also all that cycling is brilliant cycling is so much hard work so double well done!
eugh that sucks about the script tho :/ hopefully someone will hand it in, if not i hope they can sort you out hun, try not to worry too much about it though
and again, well done on your acievements for today!
Hi guys,
*hugs* rowie. Please stay safe. I know it's annoying, but they really are just trying to look out for you. How comes you don't wanna take your pill?
x
I dont take my meds as a form of punishment (if i take them and then stop it makes me feel bad) and because i am trying to stock pile them. Gosh that sounds bad...
Well done hollz! Sounds like you've had a really productive day!
I'm amazed at your motivation to exercise - I'm laaaaazy. And well done on losing weight!
Rowie I know how you feel, I've done the same with the whle punishment thing. But it really does make things worse. If you don't take them regularly enough they won't stay in your system enough to help. Sorry I'm sure you know all this and don't want the lecture, but I don't know what to say that might help.
I'm ok thanx, still majorly stressed with work. I'm making myself finish this dissertation tonight (well first draft anyways) so could be a long night for me. I'm gonna try and get a drs appointment tomoro though. I can't go to the library everyday for 9 hours, achieve nothing and then feel the need to OD everyday.
How are you claire?
x
And you're my obsession, I love you to the bones...
My chest is still sore, ahh well never made the bath though so i better not sleep in tomoz, taken my night meds now though, watching eastenders and bed early...
I am going to try and I say try to walk to work tomoz and need to have a shower before work, depends on when I get out of bed though, still manage my 9-2 tomoz and then im off on annual leave next week just by chance, bring it on..
Something has changed within me, something is not the same, I'm through with playing by the rules of someone elses game. Too late for second guessing, too late to go back to sleep, its time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap....
Somethings I cannot change, but till I try I'll never know...
***
Big hugs to all my friends on here, thanks for your constant support - love you guys
Hi SG, to be honest, I don't thnk there is a 'typical' person with BPD. What makes you say that anyway?
x
I meant that i don't fit into the symptoms of BPD like the unable to keep relationships I have been in a relationship with my partner for 4 years and we are still going strong
was awake early again. caught up with Corrie and Emmers though on itv2.
got my dad staying with me. he's flat out asleep in the spare room snoring.
dad stays until sunday. i get on ok with him.
i don't really like bank holiday weekends, i find that they drag on. i have nothing planned to keep me occupied either.
i've saved up enough money to join the gym though, so i might join. but i can't go swimming cos of the cuts on my arm.
i could go in the gym or do i class though.. hmm.. somehting to think about.
i've not been taking my pills properly. i have lowered my dose of risperidone. stupid, i know. because last time i did that i ended up in hospital. (I don't think it was JUST because of lowering the risp). I have given myself a stern talking to and when I refill my dosette up on Sunday I WILL make sure I put the full dose of risperidone in. i DO NOT want to end up back in hospital.
hi everyone.
how are you all?
I'm feeling so depressed and i've been like this for days its getting really bad.
" my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never, never leave you during your times of trials and suffering. When you see only one set of footprints it was then that I carried you" you were carried out of are lifes into the next and when its my time to leave this life I know i will be carried into the next life with you.
I wish i had my world complete again.
'Can we protend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars, i could really use a wish right now' BoB
