I want to tell you so many things
Truth is, you'll never know how much you mean to me
Shame.
I am not perfect and I don't claim to be. And if that's what you wanted, well I am so sorry... So mighty, so hegemonic, so hating, so desecrating, so there, so nowhere, so hurting, we fall between indifference, rejection...
~*forever_lost*~; my RYL cousin. Hells; my RYL niece. Katch; my RYL big sister. Voice Of Reason; my everything.
I'm afraid I'm going to lose them both, then it'll push me over the edge
Is that what they want?
I am not perfect and I don't claim to be. And if that's what you wanted, well I am so sorry... So mighty, so hegemonic, so hating, so desecrating, so there, so nowhere, so hurting, we fall between indifference, rejection...
~*forever_lost*~; my RYL cousin. Hells; my RYL niece. Katch; my RYL big sister. Voice Of Reason; my everything.
I don't miss you.
Sometimes I think about you.
And yes, I'm still a bit in love with you.
And if anyone offered you back, I'd do whatever they asked.
But...I'm getting over you.
I'm actually the happiest I've ever been single (since you) atm.
I've proved I don't need you.
No where near as much as I thought.
I'm glad you ditched me.
I'm gunna find someone better now my eyes are open.
Thank you x
T= 'Some people can f*ck off' Thanks. Seriously thank you. Friends for many years and because she decides to reply a couple of times to you, you decide i can **** off. What do you know about it, seriously? Do you have any idea how much her words hurt me. How much they cut into me? How long i cried for? How rubbish i felt? How much it hurt. It hurt more than i can ever describe. So don't you say i can just f*ck off. I don't want her there because looking at her reminds me of the start of my spiral. My spiral to utter self destruction and this point. But you wouldn't have a clue about that now, would you? I mean you don't know anything about me. Even when you caught me with a knife against my arm you didn't believe what i was doing. Brushed it off. So don't you dare act like you know anything. YOU DON'T.
F= I cannot physically or emotionally describe how much pain you brought me. I can't put into words how much you affected me. I cannot describe how broken i was. I cannot explain how much hurt i felt when you decided to unleash your venomous words on me. I cannot express how much i have changed since then. But i cannot deny that you were the first piece/ the first step that led to my self destruction.
I don't hate you. I don't. But i hate the way looking at you reminds me of that starting place. And of all the pain to come.
"I'll lean on you and you lean on me and we'll be okay"
I'm scared to leave the house.
I hate being around you.
I feel like a child. Like I have no right to feel the way I do...
Like If I tell somebody how I truly feel I will get laughed at. I have no friends and no life. I'm sorry I can't be what you wanted. I'm sorry I'm destroying something that belongs to you. Sorry I stole pills. Sorry I make you ill, Sorry I make you worry. I'm ****ing sorry ok? I don't know what else I can say.
I'm tired. Physically drained. I'm scared I can't go on. I have dreams about different ways I can end it... I sit for hours thinking about THE note... If it will be enough. If you could ever forgive me.
I love you so much. I just can't help it. I wish I was somebody else. I wish I was happy, all I want is to be normal :(
I'm not sleeping, and when you asked "have you had anymore more thoughts...." Well. I never stopped. You made it worse. A whole lot worse... I need it. I know I hurt you. But to be honest I'm nothing but a selfish bitch... I couldn't care less.
I have lost everything. Friends... Future... everything that was ever important. I never need your help. Your help hurts. Just let me go please? If you loved me you would want this for me. I just can't fight no more.
I hate what I have done. The regrets... It's too much. You can never know.
I will never forgive you for reading my diary. I know you were worried. But it was my business. My secret. Now I have nothing. I wanted it to be mine... Now they all know. I can't wait to leave I want to be truly alone.
I'm so sorry. I love you. I really do.
It hurts to much to know I'm hurting you.
Sorry x
~Beauty without intellence, is a materpiece painted on a napkin.~
You seem so unreachable.
I need to do something before it gets outta hand.
What do I know?
It already looks outta hand from where I'm standing.
Please S, don't **** up.
You're so pretty and cute and funny and everyone adores you.
I don't see what the problem is =[
I am not perfect and I don't claim to be. And if that's what you wanted, well I am so sorry... So mighty, so hegemonic, so hating, so desecrating, so there, so nowhere, so hurting, we fall between indifference, rejection...
~*forever_lost*~; my RYL cousin. Hells; my RYL niece. Katch; my RYL big sister. Voice Of Reason; my everything.
I love you. I love you. I am hopelessly, completely, deeply in love with you. I think you're the most amazing person I've ever met in my entire life and I know I can never love anyone like I love you. I don't wanna be your friend, I wanna be so much more than this. I love you.
