Suicidal

[chinahorse]

I'm watching highway patrol. How I haven't seen every episode yet I dunno.. around half 8 ish.

[chinahorse]

Or I'm watching ones from the early 2000s lol.

Yeah I'm in the quiet carriage so hopefully napping will be easier too. I have some chocolate to snack on as I got it as a leaving gift and will get fruit in the morning. I have my kindle. You just reminded me to charge my ipod!

A list is a fab idea. Doing that now.

[chinahorse]

Nope it a direct train to London and then the tube to jodies.

Haha I forgot pants a hairbrush and toothbrush when I went to visit the casself last time.

[chinahorse]

I think we will just chill.

Haha Ive found changing trains in the freezing winter isn't fun. And thankfully it's nowhere near as long a journey as the bus.

I am definitely all packed now bar my hair dryer. I may shower to stop me pacing.

[chinahorse]

That must be some sort of record!

I'm in a fair bit of pain but hoping meds kick in soon. You can move more on a train than a bus so I should be ok.

I can't find my deodorant!

[chinahorse]

True.

Now I'm struggling. And was food behavioural :( I'm just so anxious about it.

[chinahorse]

I'm having a cuppa and breathing.

[chinahorse]

I'm in town now. Just got my wages so I'm rich for all of 10 mins before j pay them into the bank. I feel better for going out.

[chinahorse]

Thank you <3

I had to speed buy a new purse as my purse died.

I'm on a train now. I'm starving. And anxious and exhausted. And I have no way to easily harm. And I cant pace which was helping.

[Bellatrix]

Keep breathing Lillie. Calm deep breaths.

You'll be at mine before too long and we can relax with my huge TV and just have drinks and chill with some crappy films and gossip and chat. It'll take your mind off it. And if you wanna talk about it at any point just say so and I'm happy to listen and offer advice.

You can do this. You need this. You've been without help for so long it's amazing you've survived. But here is an opportunity to do more than survive. You're being given an opportunity to live again. Take it. Be strong. And I'll be there every step of the way.

And remember you have weekends off so you can come to mine any weekend and we'll do something fun. We can go to my boys and go swimming at the wave pool or cinema or park and take pictures. We'll keep you strong me and J. He's already said you're welcome at his any time and he's offering all he can to support you too. He doesn't understand as well as we do but he's there for you too.

You're not alone. You've got everyone here and me and J and your family and friends back home. We're all rooting for you and here should you need a hand to hold.

Love you.

[Uglyducklin]

Hugs Lillie . Thinking of you to Jodie so glad you have each other for support. I know I don't know you that well Lillie but I'm in Richmond once a week so if you ever want to meet up the offer is there. I totally understand if you don't want to though. Hang in there xx

[[Luna]]

Thinking of you Lillie. I really hope today goes smoothly.
Love you loads xx

[chinahorse]

Thank you everyone, epically jodie <3

Jessie what a kind offer! I shall have to see how things go as I don't know the timetable yet.

I'm really nervous and really tired. Not an enjoyable combination.

[Bellatrix]

Just taken her to the Cassel. She's nervous and scared but I know she's in the right place. Still hard leaving her there though.

I spoke to a member of staff about risk and he said he'd call me if he needed to and I can call anytime if I'm worried. He was helpful. Feel hopeful this place can really help her.

She's off to see her room and do all the admission forms now. I wasn't allowed in so I had to leave. Would have liked to stay with her.

Lillie good luck. Remember I. Only an hour or so away so I can cone anytime. You got this. Love you.

[tiptoes]

Wishing you all the best <3

[[Luna]]

Thank you for letting us know Jodie

Lillie, I only live a bus journey away so if you want or need anything feel free to text me.

You're in the right place love. You can do this.
Sending a bucket of love xx

[Pomegranate]

Good luck Lillie x

[Sketchy]

Good luck Lillie. I hope you get the help you need.

[chinahorse]

Thank you everyone. X

[Moonlight Princess]

ALL the love Lillie. Can't really put it better than Jodie and we all rooting for you.

You got this kiddo <3