Just been given a piece of good news. I may have a job offer for a part time reception role. But I don't want to get too excited becasue it may not come through and then my mood will drop, and I"m too sad to get excited anyways.
Hey JodMum, I loved our skype call just then, I really hope you keep your promises lovely, I am so worried about you, please do go to A&E if things feel too much, whether you've OD'd or not.
Wifey agrees too. *nod* :)
We love you so much, and we will BBM you now.
Please try to keep your promises. <3
*lots of cuddles (that are safe and warm) and kisses(that are safe as long as you feel okay with them)*
xxxxx
Jodie has gone to A&E, she has taken pills & cut herself & she was on the phone to me as she went into A&E, she sounds very distressed, so I think she could use some gentle hugs and support please.
JodMum, I'm so fucking proud of you for going to A&E, I really am, you know I will always be here for you and care for you and love you, you have been so wonderful, and please don't be sorry, you have NOTHING to be sorry for.
I'll carry on texting you & supporting you, but just know I love you, I care so much, and I am here always.
- Wifey is too!!!
Talk to us when you feel able to / up to it, I imagine the hospital trip will make you feel drained /stressed and such, so take your time but please be as safe as possible.
Well done for taking my advice and getting on that bus, I am so proud of you for being resourceful, proactive and brave. I will be here for you as long as you need me. xx
Jodie asked me to post to say she's in hospital being treated for the tablets and mental health crisis and that despite wanting to go home she's still there. Apparently there is a nice nurse on the ward she's been transferred to try to get to to eat.
She's feeling very vulnerable right now and unsure of how long they will want to keep her there.
-Jodie, your a fighter, they are trying to help, let them be your allies and battle your struggles with you xxx Appologises for zonked post!
Still here. Thank god for blackberry. Trying to find out when can go home. Thank you so much marie and sarah for helping me get here. You actually saved my life and while I'm not in a place where I want to live, I'm sure I will be thankful for it in the long run. Thank you all for your ongoing support. I will be back when I get out of here xx
Hon I'm so sorry I didn't realise, I hoped you would go to A&E without feeling the need to hurt yourself first... I'm very glad that others were there to support you and I'm thinking about you. I'm just sad that you felt you had to hurt yourself before you went.
Is being in a supportive environment helping at all?
'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'
['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']
'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell. Oscar Wilde
Its hard to dance with the devil on your back. Sydney Carter
Also reasons I love you:
-You're hilariously funny when you want to be (and sometimes when you don't ;-p)
-You are incredibly intelligent
-You are so beautiful
-So supportive to everyone you stumble across
-Such amazing fashion sense
-Such a quirky outlook on life
-Unwillingness to give up on people
And many many many more. You are such a wonderful person JodiE, don't throw that away by giving up on your life.
'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'
['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']
'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell. Oscar Wilde
Its hard to dance with the devil on your back. Sydney Carter
I am thinking of you & sending you my love. <3
I am glad you were able to get the help and support you need right now, I hope they're treating you well and with lots of love and care, like we would give to you.
On the train going to my friends for a few days. Still feeling anxious and as though I want to die but I know she will keep me distracted for a few days. Thurs I have therapy again - she's gonna be so mad. The hosp told her I was admitted :(
Thank you for your support. I went to the hosp about midnight after overdosing. They did my bloods and gave me a drip/ECG monitor. I was kept in over night and saw the psychiatric liaison team in the morning. They asked so many questions but knew a lot off stuff already because Philippa had but it on the shared noted system. She gave me the info for a suicide retreat in london that takes people in crisis for 4 days to help them free. But you can only go once. And she told me to come back if I felt at risk again.
I just don't know what to do. I feel wrong. I feel like I shouldn't be here, and I have no reason to live. When I think about it and I try to be rational, I have no reason to be here at all. Anything I can offer, someone else can offer too. So what's the point in me being there, taking up room and resource to offer something that is totally supernumary? There isn't. My existence makes no sense.
Meh
Last edited by Bitter_Angel : 18-04-2011 at 11:30 PM.
Reason: Removing info regarding OD
No one could ever give, or be, what you can JodiE. I may love or care for a million and one people but no one could ever, EVER take your place. And I know other people feel like that too.
I'm sure your therapist will be more concerned than angry.
Hope you have fun at your friend's :)
'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'
['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']
'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell. Oscar Wilde
Its hard to dance with the devil on your back. Sydney Carter
I understand those feelings, having experienced similar myself - I think they are the kind of feelings that come from depression and traumatic experiences.
Go gently with yourself and stay safe - you ARE worth it.
Jodie sweetheart, I'm really sorry I haven't bben about. Was it the Maytree that they reccommended to you? Even if you don't go, they're a good set of people to call; I've called them a couple of times.
Call them, please. They can take you in, for a few days, it's nothing invovled with nhs services but they can do a couple of days. They'll sort it within hours. Please: I know i'm not about much but I'm so bloody worried about you and I've been thinking about you.
I'm with Katie: the same things have happened to me, and I know how this feels. Please keep yourself self; so many people care so much about you.
You can get hold of me through Sarah if you want to talk, online. My phone's died. Please take care sweeatheart. Ev xxx
Whatever Happened to our Inner Glow?
<3 Sarah, My brilliant, beautiful, RAWR little sis
Take care of yourself, Jodie. I'm glad that your therapist has referred you to the CMHT immediately and I hope that they can help you. I hope that this thread is showing you how many people care about you and want to see you safe, well and looking after yourself. We're here for as long as you need and longer, actually :)
