I think I might be starting to annoy you because of x y and z. I can't help it. It's just how I've always been. And everybody has ended up hating me and leaving me because of it. I hope you won't too... I'll try to be better.
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Stop telling me I've lost weight, or asking me if I have. It hurts so much more than you could realise because I haven't.
The only time you will find real light is when you're searching in the dark..
Why did you give that piece to her? What were you thinking?? I may have been quieter, but at least I always sing in tune. You knew how important it was to me! I would have worked so hard to get it right, I would have done the best I possibly could. You were my teacher, you were meant to have faith in me! I trusted you. I was doing the best I could, practising between 2 and 4 hours a day, every chance I could. And you still gave that piece to her. That really hurt. I've been blaming myself this whole time, but there was nothing more I could have done on my own, you were supposed to help me. Didn't you have a better way to teach me to sing louder? One that didn't include just telling me, "Sing louder"?? As if I hadn't already thought of that... honestly, you my have all of those qualifications, but if that was the best you can do, you shouldn't be teaching singing.
God is the only one who sees me as beautiful now, and the eyes of God are the only eyes I care about...
I HAVE HAD ENOUGH! I'm NOT okay. Please, help me. Please. I'm falling through the levels; think I might just have said goodbye to the Fifth and I'm nearing the Seventh, the Seventh is November month, the time for self-murder. I kill myself evey winter. How does it feel to free-fall? Please don't leave me. I need you now more than ever, because I am losing myself.
M & J - Thank you. Your support has been immense and I actually can't thank you enough. I have been so lucky to have you both, you are amazing. You two are the greatest friends a person could have and I'll never be able to express how grateful I am. I hope I never lose you.
HTT - You've never been nice to me before. You've never taken me seriously. I don't really know whats changed but I'm so immensely thankful. Your kindness today almost brought me to tears. Thank you for being so understanding, it's really given me hope.
im sorry im mucking your life up and making you depressed! i dont mean to be a fuck up! i just am! i love you and i know you love me too! you just hurt me sometimes when you say those things but then i guess its only what i should expect when i hurt you so much by trying to kill myself!
i know you are scared that i will just never get better and the doctors pretty much said that today but i promise you i will try! i know im your daughter and you hate to see me upset and "unwell" but there is nothing you can do about it! we just have to live with it! I have to live with it! and i do need to grow up! i know that you think i have the emotional intellegence of a 9 year old (when my nan died) and i agree to some extent but only some of the time when im scared otherwise i think im totally normal
I love you. You make me feel alive. Like a normal person. I love you andd that's why I let you do this to me. I never want to see you hurt or unhappy, I was hoping you wanted the same for me.
You are amazing. You always know how to make me smile, which is a really rare gift. Why can't you just love me?
My RYL family: PaperClip is my big sis
"Greatness inspires envy, envy engenders spite, spite spawns lies. You must know this, Dumbledore."
- The Dark Lord
I don't get what Ive done to annoy everyone and make you all not like me, but i'll stop, i'll just ignore you from now on. I hope that makes you happy. ;_;
you say I'm skinny as hell but then you say I have a big ass?! thanks for fueling me to relapse more then I already have you fat bitch
I'm sorry for giving that to you..I shouldn't have, but you didn't have to be so cold with me when I asked for it back..I could use a friend right now you know that.
“Because everything that goes around comes around. Maybe it's luck or maybe it's fate, but either way, it comes back around."
Rest in Love Sar-sis. I'll see you the next time around hopefully <3 12/11/92-05/18/16
AJs mommy ❤️ 11/26/17
Married to my best friend and Soulmate 3/5/18 ❤️💍
I'm in self-destruct mode.
And I have no intention of fighting it.
Now I'll play your ghost as my ace, whenever I'm led astray.
But I am actually good, can't help it if we're tilted.
I'm in my right place, don't be a downer.
