A friend, after she'd seen a really bad cigarette burn on my arm "Show me. Do the same to me and then you'll see how it feels.". She tried to make me and I had a panic attack. Thanks.
Out shopping with my mum, a month or so after she found out about my SHing, "But that top has short sleeves."
"That's horrible", almost every time anyone sees my scars
PS. NoWarButTheClassWar, my scars are almost all vertical too
"And sometimes when our fights begin,
I think I'll let the Dragons win...
And then I think perhaps I won't,
Because they're Dragons, and I don't."
My sister, talking about the scars on my arms:
Her- But don't they hurt?
Me- No *runs hand up my arm*
Her- OMG, don't touch it, that goes through me!
I was only touching my own arm -_-
And my OT (this isn't really that inappropriate but it made me laugh):
'Can't you do something less destructive? What could you do that's more.... self nurturing? Umm, I know, have you ever tried talking to your teddies?'
... I question which one of us is the crazy one!
A customer at my job, she was at the checkout across from mine.
"Oh. My. God...Dad I'm going to kill myself. Seriously, I wanna, like, commit suicide. I need to get Mascara, foundation, and a new top and I only have $15. Will you pay for my mascara pleaseee? I will seriously just slit my wrists on Monday if I don't have mascara."
I mean she didn't say it to me, just really loudly right next to me...but still. I really wanted to tell her off for talking like that, it's really upsetting to hear someone talking like that when you're actually feeling suicidal...
"Some people get by, with a little understanding. Some people get by, with a whole lot more."
I went to post in this thread but it disappeared so I'm sorry if I have infact posted twice and I'm just being thick;
The worst I got was when I was just being introduced to my sister in law/brothers friends. (lovely group of friends!)
And sat in a pub, about 20 people, stretched out along a table, and the lass opposite me (Who I'd met once or twice, she was nice, not friends or owt.. Also, she is LOUD) she decides she can sympathise with me and LOUDLY goes "OH I SELF HARMED ONCE TOO, LOOK" and holds out her arms.. not a single scratch. "You cant see any cause I only did it once, but I still did"
****ing everyone looked at us. My arms aren't too bad, just a couple of obvious cuts, but I don't think it's too obvious.
Both me and my sister in law were in shock. What do you say?!
I can't even remember what I did or said in responce to be honest.
Since then, I have had drinks with her, and I have said in incredibly strong words how ridiculous and innpropriate she was!!
Also, when I was 16 I had my one and only job, and on the application it said 'any history of illness' and being genuine, as I consider myself to be, I wrote 'anxiety, depression, self harm'.
In my second interview, just me and a 50+year old boss, read my app and asked to see my arms... Asked to see my scars. My first ever job interview, I showed him. He just 'ahh okay'ed and carried on. Touched my arms and everything.
Looking back, I cannot believe I didn't punch the ****er in the face for even suggesting I show him such a thing (Doesn't help that he turned out to be an absolute ****, hated by every emplyee)
Last edited by Meganrose : 05-05-2012 at 08:09 PM.
I saw this today while looking through some things about self harm and honestly I was shocked by the cruelty in the comment.
"well i have to agree and disagree with you. cutting is an addiction but only to a certain extent. at some point its your responsibility but people who act like victims are pathetic attention whores."
I really hate the word superficial. I know what the dr meant, and i know she had to ask, she was just asking had it got worse. She even realised that i might find that word difficult, she said she didnt mean it in that way. But i still hate it. And i didnt admit that actually, it has got worse. Because its still superficial, just less so
He was no longer jean valjean but no. 24601 -les miserable
Some of life's mysteries will never be solved, such as why, after spending an entire evening listenong to Bach, do I find myself humming "the birdie song".......
I am reaching, but i fall, and the stars are black and cold, as i stare into the void of a world that cannot hold- les miserables
When getting my 2nd out of 3 vaccines in school...really loudly nurse said
"thats a pretty pattern did you do that to yourself?"
*stares at her*
"well they're only scratches but are you seeing anyone about it?"
I had no problem with getting vaccines, Infact I was always the one who was least effected by them but when it was time for the third vaccine I acted like a child I refused to go in until everyone else had gone in, saying I had a phobia which made them just want me to go in first...had a go at the administrator who asked me & everyone else to take their jumpers of before going in to save time and made my friend whos got a phobia sit with me till I had it done.
Suprising how someones words can change you...
And an old friend who did art was sculpturing something and was going to get some water and as she got to door she turned around came back picked up the tools she was using and said 'Can't leave you with them...' - tottally triggered me
Last edited by HannahHope : 10-05-2012 at 04:54 PM.
There was a boy in one of my classes who thought he was being really funny when he drew a dotted line with the words "cut along the dotted line" on his wrist. I though he was being very insensitive especially since he knows another girl in the class harms.
That reminded me of how my parents were reacting when they found out I was a teen. Their reaction was to lock all the sharp knives away in the gun cabinet, only bringing them out one at a time when it was being used. If you wanted to use one for whatever reason (say chopping an onion) then you had to ask, and wait for them to bring it to you. As soon as it wasnt needed, then it had to be locked away. Never mind the fact that I never used the kitchen knives to cut myself with (what I was actually using they let me keep) or even actually misused the kitchen knives in any way, they had to be locked away "because I couldnt be trusted". Instead of trying to deal with the problem, that was their solution. This carried on for 5 years before they realised how impractical it was and besides the fact they knew I was still SIing, and that by locking the knives away that it was making no difference to my SIing.
So that may not be an inappropriate thing to say, but it was certainly an inappropriate action.
Yes similar things happening here :( I'm not allowed anything sharp, basically. Despite the fact that if I wanted to hurt myself I would probably find another way. It's not a particularly practical way of trying to get me to stop.
And when my mum confronts me about it, accusing me of cutting myself etc when actually I've been doing really well, just gets me really angry and makes me cut again. If she would just butt out, I'd be getting on a lot better :'(
~ Instruction does much, but encouragement does everything ~
(Me and Mum talking about a trip I'm meant to be going on with my choir, but they're not sure I'm well enough to go)
Mum: They want assurance you're not going to be a danger to yourself or anything. Like, they can't risk it if you cut yourself while you're there
Me: I'm not going to do that, for goodness' sake!!
Mum: And people are going to see your scars too
Me: So?
Mum: So, it'll frighten the poor little year 7s and 8s! I don't think you realise how much this is affecting everyone around you!
So...so, I should never show my scars, ever, because they'll frighten people?
And yes, I do realise. Too much. That's what makes me feel more guilt and cut myself even more, right.
~ Instruction does much, but encouragement does everything ~
Said by me two "best friends": Nobody cares about you anway, so why dont you go cry and cut yourself some more, and while you're at it never talk to us again"
Needless to say, broken friendship after that
The shadows are long and she fears if she cries that first tear, the tears will not stop raining down"
-Superchick
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future."
Jeremiah 29:11
To the world you are one person, but to one person you are the world. <3
the other day a psychologist evaluating me asked me what my major in school was. I said oh ironically its psychology. He burst into laughter and said "whos going to take psychological advise from someone cut up like you"....
May you grow up to be righteous,
May you grow up to be true,
May you always know the truth
And see the lights surrounding you.
May you always be courageous,
Stand upright and be strong,
May you stay forever young
Feel free to message me if you ever need ANYTHING
the other day a psychologist evaluating me asked me what my major in school was. I said oh ironically its psychology. He burst into laughter and said "whos going to take psychological advise from someone cut up like you"....
I can't believe he said that, what an idiot! That is an absolute disgrace. Actually, you will be probably be better equipped to give advice because of your experiences. You have been there and know what it's like. Don't listen to him. If you enjoy your studies and are passionate about it then you will get there.
I can honestly say I've never seen a child that was frightened by my scars. Most young ones won't say anything, and even if they do, it's innocent curiosity. I hate when people use that as an excuse to make us feel bad about scars. -.-
Duct tape is like The Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
Went to my GP today to, among other things, ask for more info about our local Skin Camouflage service. Whenever I see him about stuff like this, I always get the impression I should be taking care of him rather than vice versa.
He can't even bring himself to say the words 'self-harm'. He just mumbles and mimes.
"what HAVE you done to your arms?!?!" - ticket man on the train yesterday the first time in months I had to courage to wear a tshirt and show my scars, because it was boiling hot.
I smiled and gave him my ticket, then as soon as he walked away I burst into tears and put my jacket back on. That's me in long sleeves for the whole summer then, now I know the reactions I'll get.
It's just hit me that I'm going to have to live with this for as long as I live :/
~ Instruction does much, but encouragement does everything ~
from my mother. "I have more server depression that you ever had and you don't see me cutting myself! You do this just for attention and to piss me off"
It's like really mom?!?! Then why did I hide it for 13 years? How come you are just now finding out about it...
