Aww hun, I've just read through all this, so sorry for not being there before. I didn't realise I was missing all this by leaving!
I'm thinking of you with your appointment, do update me on what happens. I've got to pop down the shop and get some credit in an hour, so I can ring/text you then, until then I'm out of action myself, so don't think I'm ignoring you! If you've creditless then missed call me and I'll get back to you. I want to be there for you. Deep breaths, you've lived through this before and you'll live through this again. I'm with you in spirit and in that sense you're never alone. You deserve some help and support and I can only cross my fingers that they give it to you.
Love you loads and sorry again xxxxxxxx
How could you become as awesome as you are and still feel like a loser?
Dear Gods, Laura, who called you self centered?? I see you as the exact opposite of that.
As for your phone being waterlogged, take the battery out of it and put that, and the phone into your airing cupboard overnight, this will give all the electronics a proper chance to dry out. Hopefully, it should work after that.
It is good to hear that they phoned you/you phoned them back (sorry my focus and memory is crap and you wouldn't think I just read it...) hopefully they will get it sorted. It is worth while you are there, insisting that they make sure they have all your records and contact numbers/preferences et al so that they can't use that excuse again.
*hugs* thinking of you, and sorry for being useless...
Roiben x
If the Human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we wouldn't.
Dear Gods, Laura, who called you self centered?? I see you as the exact opposite of that.
Seconded!
I've texted you my private thoughts on the matter (in appaulling language), don't know if you've got it with your phone being a bit under weather.
Hun, right now, you are very unwell. You do not need to think about anyone other than yourself, you shouldn't - I think everyone (on this thread at least, and they're the people who count) wants you to think about yourself at the moment, because we recognise how much you're suffering and I also, want to say, we recognise how much you are trying to help yourself - and I am so proud of you for how you are coping despite so many things coming up against. If I could stop you from supporting other people at the moment, I would, but you have a very kind and caring nature, and I know you care a lot about people, but basically the point of this ramble is that you are amazing, and don't listen to anyone who tells you otherwise.
I'll try to update when i get back..but don't count on it if i've had a bad time of it. I'll text someone anyway to update as to how it went as i'll probably not be in the mood.
Thanks again for your support XXXX
Last edited by typsee : 02-06-2009 at 08:09 PM.
Reason: please avoid talking about personal communication between yourself and another RYL member
I have spoken to Laura, and she's asked me to update you all.
Laura had a really hard time at the appointment, and as a result needs all our support right now.
The people who saw her said she would have to see the crisis team, which Laura has had very bad experiences with in the past, and there is a long waiting list for beds. In short, Laura is not going to be admitted to hospital, as we had hoped. She is not seeing the crisis team, at her request, due to how they have worsened things in the past.
As you can imagine Laura is having an awful time right now, so if people could be aware of that and lend some support that would be great.
Abigail x
Last edited by Fallen Rain : 02-06-2009 at 05:41 PM.
Reason: Clarifying about the crisis team.
I know how difficult it can be being under the crisis team - all those different people coming to your house and asking you the same damn questions but maybe it will give you a way of keeping safe for shorter periods.
Can they not find a bed out of the area for you or a private bed hun?
Thinking of you.
Please stay safe.
*hugs and plops herself down to sit next to Laura*
"Everything is possible through Christ, who gives me strength". Phillipians 4:13
hi Acrasia, random stranger again, sorry you didn't get the result you were hoping for, i hope the crisis team can help even a little bit, or if not that something else comes along for you soon.
Laura, you are in my thoughts and I am sending as many hugs as I can fit down the internet. I am sorry you did not get the result you hoped for. Stay strong and hopefully a bed will free up for you very soon. I do not have experience with a crisis team... so can not offer advice on that part.
Hugs
Roiben x
If the Human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we wouldn't.
Thankyou Abigail for updating for me. I'll try my hardest to articulate something decent now i'm a bit de-stressed (yay for Temazepam).
I pretty much ranted/raved/swore during the whole assessment. There is a huge waiting list for beds on the local ward. Right, OK, fine. He then went on to say that if i'm to go to hospital i'd need an assessment from the crisis team, and even then if they see fit i should be in hospital (which they wouldn't because they're wankers) i could be sent ANYWHERE. And i litrali mean ANYWHERE in england. I could be shipped off to never never land.
THIS i did not want. I may want to be in hospital but under no circumstance am i going a million miles away to a hospital i don't know, my agoraphobia wouldn't allow it.
It is clearly stated in my notes (which he surprisingly read) that i will not have the home treatment team (crisis team) as they make me worse. This in short has left me with no options.
He wants me to up my dosage of meds to 300mg for my BPD (am on 150mg). Told him regardless of my dosage it will not help my current state of mind.
I told him how disgusted i was at the mental health services in this area, how i couldn't believe both my CPN AND consultant psychiatrist could take the same week off and not let me know - how professional of them.
I told him the only person who has helped me over the past 2 years is my GP, and as he is only my GP there is only so much he can do.
So all in all, i am completely screwed, and the only way out is..well, i don't need to spell it out, do i?
I get my medication friday, i should be hopefully gone at the weekend. I told him that i want nothing to do with any of them anymore, they're as useless as a needle in a haystack. I am being left on my own until monday - safe much? I know i refused the crisis team but even for the psych to tell my GP to phone me daily would have been something.
I've had it. I've gone to every appointment for the last 2 and a bit years, i have taken all the medications, i have tried my hardest in getting the necessary support and each time it falls on deaf ears and i'm not prepared to do it anymore. I tried and that's the main thing.
The only thing he said was that he'd contact Dr.Dell'erba (my consultant psych) to get his permission to skip the crisis team and put me straight on the hospital waiting list. But by the time a bed becomes free, i may a) not be in crisis, or b) not even be here. So whats the fucking point?
I'm exhausted. And i want friday to come so i can stock up on medication and get the fuck out of here while i have the chance.
Sorry your support has come to nothing, but it has been very much appreciated and without you all i wouldn't have made it this far.
