I obviously can't speak to how it differs in the UK versus here, but at least where I live in the US, having an official diagnosis through testing doesn't really change the support you have access to. At least not as an adult. I'm not saying don't be on the waiting list or don't get tested if you want to do it, just to say that self diagnosis is just as valid.
I've had to go out of my way to figure out some of the support (professional mental health stuff as well as non-professional) that I do have, and to get that support in most cases self diagnosis was totally fine.
I think everyone and their needs are different. At this point I don't really feel a need to look into testing, barriers like cost or accessibility aside, just because I know it wouldn't change how or what type of support I can access. If that changes in the future though I would consider looking into it. I know it's very expensive and hard to access here though as well. It's much harder to find folks qualified to do testing for adults, and even harder to find those willing to do it on someone who is non-speaking.
We've been struggling a lot. With the heat, fireworks, storms, schedule changes, etc.. Humaning is really hard. It feels never ending. We also cancelled meeting with our coach human two weeks in a row. We probably need to try to meet with them and see if that will help.
Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
I’m also struggling with the heat. Its a bit cooler today but the extra noise and people is overwhelming. Trying to stay indoors as much as possible, which is hard when you have a cat that wants outside in the sunshine 99% of the day. Don’t like the music and stuff people blare oht of their houses eother, what makes them think I wamt to listen to their **** music? Urgh.
Camden, might be an idea to meet with your coach human to see if they have any suggestions? It might at least help to talk to someone who understands, even if they don’t have many suggestions. I wish I could talk to Claire but she’s on holiday until the 18th.
Last edited by The Worst Witch : 13-07-2022 at 01:59 PM.
I know it would make the noise from outside bigger, but do you have a window you could leave open so the cat can come and go as they please?
I hate when people are deliberately loud around residential areas. They don’t know who they could be disturbing/upsetting. Could you look into noise cancelling earbuds or earplugs?
I hope you guys get to speak to your support people soon.
'It's an impossible choice ... I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me.'
"You're not scared of climbing mountains. You're scared that you can't make them move."
We have had issues with a neighbor human's music too. We end up using relay to contact the police humans every time it is too loud because he is scary. It is awful and nobody needs to listen to music that loud. Ever. We know they have come multiple times to talk to him because they told us there have been multiple complaints. Unsure what the options are where you live but it has been worth it.
We were supposed to meet with our coach human yesterday but they cancelled because they were sick. So we will hopefully meet with them next week.
I imagine you want to be outside to supervise kitten antics? I am sure that is difficult to explain to him though.
Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
Do have to supervise Soot outside or he runs away. Theres been a speight of incidents around here too where people have put down glass/anti freeze/other stuff to deliverately harm them and I don’t trust him not to go up to a stranger and for them to steal him. Probably being over paranoid but better sare than sorry.
Lio, I do have noise cancelling headphones. They do work, but as I’m mostly with friends and stuff when outside I can’t really wear them and then hear conversations and stuff. I did have a day to myself today which helped a bit.
I get it about keeping an eye on Soot, that makes perfect sense. My two have always been outdoor cats and I do get pretty stressed - if I ever have more I’ll probably keep them indoors/leash train them.
I got some Loop earplugs which I was sceptical about, but they do actually help, I can still hear but the background noise is less overwhelming. I hate the feel of them in my ears though, so I have to weigh up which would be worse.
I hope that today isn’t too loud/hot for you. I think the heatwave is going away on Wednesday/Thursday so only a few more days.
My meeting with the person who did my assessment is at 11, I’m pretty nervous. At least it’s online.
'It's an impossible choice ... I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me.'
"You're not scared of climbing mountains. You're scared that you can't make them move."
Hope the rain has helped! Apparently in some areas it might get into the 40s next week. Climate change is terrifying. As is living in the south east of England when it's happening. Def a good reason to skip being a human.
My appointment didn't go. They emailed me at 9:06 to say that the person doing it was off, and they offered for it to go ahead with someone else but I didn't see it until 10:59 so I replied asking if it was still going ahead and tried to join the meeting but it never started, and they emailed me half an hour later offering to schedule it later today but it's going to be next Thursday with the original person now.
'It's an impossible choice ... I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me.'
"You're not scared of climbing mountains. You're scared that you can't make them move."
I’m sorry your appointment got cancelled. At least they let you know, although I do sympathise with last minute schedule changes. This is why I prefer text to emails, everyone whatsapps me to tell me what I’m doing ha. Hate phones though, phone calls don’t get answered unless I know who it is and I’m expecting it.
Need to venture out to the shops today, have no food in after my freezer defrosted itself and ruined all my stuff in it.
Oh gosh that's so frustrating. Both to the meeting and to the freezer issue.
I'm sorry you are all having a heat wave. I'm guessing none of you have air conditioning? I'm so glad we do here. We could not survive without it and can only imagine how awful and uncomfortable it must be.
Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
I wish I had air conditioning Camden! They do have it in cars, so maybe I should just buy a car to live in in the summer months haha.
Did anyone else find it difficult transitioning from being a child to an adult? I’m told I’m still a child in many ways (like I still suck my thumb and use dummies sometimes) and can have quite a childish attitude. I find myself wishing sometimes that I still was one, but I don’t know why. I did have a pretty stable childhood thanks to my mum (we’ll not mention my dad), and I do remember it being a relatively happy one in the sense that I never wanted for anything (still don’t, I have a lot of money in savings and I know my dad would help me out if ever I needed it - about the only thing he is good for). One of my ‘obsessions’ is being a child, so like I’ll pretend I’m still in school and do homework and stuff. Sometimes I’ll even go to the library and pretend I’m at school. Its starting to affect my relationships because everyone wants me to ‘grow up’ and stop behaving so childishly, but I find it a massive comfort from the chaos. I don’t know if I should stop, or if its fine to still suck my thumb amd pretend I’m in school etc as long as I can be an adult most of the time.
I think as long as you can act appropriately when you need to, there's nothing wrong with doing or liking "childish things." If it was interfering with other things in your life or causing a scene in public or something I would maybe question it, but it sounds like other people are just being rude and judgmental simply because it's not what society "expects" so to speak.
Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
Do people on here stim? I didn't really understand what it was but I've been doing some research, and there were things noted in my assessment that I do almost automatically to self regulate, like rubbing my hands and wrists together.
As well as that I've been thinking to ways I behaved when I was happy/nervous/excited when I was younger that I kind of forced myself to stop because people noticed and either laughed at me or told me to stop.
Sorry if I'm asking too many questions, this whole diagnosis/ADHD/ASD thing has been a bit of a journey and it just feels, I don't know, good to know I'm not broken or whatever, but I'm also really really sad for younger me and all those years I thought it was all my fault yno?
'It's an impossible choice ... I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me.'
"You're not scared of climbing mountains. You're scared that you can't make them move."
Also I hate the idea of acting like a grown up the whole time - I definitely have some very childish traits and I know they put some people off but I don’t particularly enjoy the company of people who think childish=stupid/bad. If it helps you and it’s not causing any harm, what’s the problem?
'It's an impossible choice ... I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me.'
"You're not scared of climbing mountains. You're scared that you can't make them move."
I hope this isn't ninja posting and I just happened to log on just after yo posted.
I still do not know if I totally get or know what stimming is either, but I think I probably do.
It's okay to grieve as part of getting your diagnosis. It's a lot to process. What you're describing about thinking things were your fault until now is probably the biggest thing I've struggled to process too. It's a huge mindset shift and it really does shift the perspective of how you view pretty much everything. It's a lot so don't be hard on yourself.
Do you have any support or will you be getting any?
Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
When I went to the feedback appointment I asked about support and she said that where I am in the country there isn't very much, but I've found a group that meets up in person occasionally and there are online support groups.
I'm hopefully returning to therapy in a couple of weeks, so I'll see what my therapist says too.
'It's an impossible choice ... I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me.'
"You're not scared of climbing mountains. You're scared that you can't make them move."
That all sounds good. I know for me getting to know other neurodivergent humans who also just sort of get it and can relate has made a huge difference and has helped me learn more too. That is literally how we found our coach human!
Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
Lio, I just wanted to reassire you that everything that you’re feeling after having read your R/V and this thread is totally normal. I don’t know if the person who diagnosed you told you this, but mine said my sensory issues would get much worse and they have. I’m not sure why, maybe because I’m aware of them more but life in general is a lot different now I know that I have autism in botj good and bad ways (but mostly good at this point!)
I also want to reiterate that theres nothing ‘wrong’ with you. I don’t know how your family as a whole has reacted to your diagnosis, but certainly from your posts in your R/V I get the feeling they were really critical of you as a child. That was not your fault; your brain is literally wired differently to neuro typical people. I hope that reassures you a bit, but if it upsets you tell me and I’ll delete.
