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17-10-2015, 08:36 PM
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#61
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:  
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It's been ok. Annoyed because my parents Internet has been extremely slow. That didn't help.
I still have urges though but so far I have not given in.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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18-10-2015, 09:21 PM
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#62
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RYL Super Sponsor!
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
I am currently: 
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Well done for the progress with drinking and being another month free, those are both brilliant achievements!
Do you know what is causing stress for you at the moment? Do you think it might help you resist the urges to have a think about what rewards you might want for your 5 years free?
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No other sadness in the world would do
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19-10-2015, 12:07 AM
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#63
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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Originally Posted by Pi.R^2
Well done for the progress with drinking and being another month free, those are both brilliant achievements!
Do you know what is causing stress for you at the moment? Do you think it might help you resist the urges to have a think about what rewards you might want for your 5 years free?
There's a thread in serious which explains why I am stressed. But I am trying to take it one day at a time. Part of me is so determined not to cut and I will reward myself if I get to 4 years 6 months (which is in December). But part of me goes sod it all. I got rid of the razor blades a couple of years ago and it wasn't until recently that I bought some new ones. I guess I should hand them over to my cpn when she's back (she's on holiday atm). That way if I don't have them then I won't be tempted.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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19-10-2015, 06:59 PM
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#64
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.
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do hand over the blades, you don't want easy temptation. when is your cpn back?
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Zelo zelatus sum pro Domino Deo exercituum.
Ying tong iddle ai po!
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19-10-2015, 07:51 PM
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#65
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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My cpn is back on the 28th and she's coming to see me then. I can't return to store because I threw out the receipt. So far I haven't opened the package which is good I suppose.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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21-10-2015, 06:03 PM
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#66
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RYL Super Sponsor!
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
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Could you throw out the blades?
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No other sadness in the world would do
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21-10-2015, 11:32 PM
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#67
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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Originally Posted by Pi.R^2
Could you throw out the blades?
I suppose I could but I would rather give them to my cpn. Then I would be able to discuss the circumstances which led me to buying them. If I don't then I am liable to forget which kinda defeats the purpose. I hope that she doesn't refuse to take them off me (last time I got rid I shoved the blades in the sharps box but right now they're too big to fit).
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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23-10-2015, 08:12 PM
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#68
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RYL Super Sponsor!
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
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Why do you think she might refuse to take them off you?
If you feel you won't be safe with them until the 28th, could you dispose of them and make a note on your phone or something to remind you to discuss with her the circumstances that led you to buying them?
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No other sadness in the world would do
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24-10-2015, 02:31 PM
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#69
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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Originally Posted by Pi.R^2
Why do you think she might refuse to take them off you?
If you feel you won't be safe with them until the 28th, could you dispose of them and make a note on your phone or something to remind you to discuss with her the circumstances that led you to buying them?
She might not see it as her duty to take them off me. But on the other hand she might do it as helping me to prevent me from hurting myself. I have a tendency to stockpile otc drugs to OD on and she has taken them off me so that I won't get tempted to do things on impulse.
I nearly cut myself last night. I managed to get the blades in my hand because I opened the package. But I didn't cut. But I was so tempted.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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25-10-2015, 05:52 PM
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#70
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RYL Super Sponsor!
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
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Honestly I think you need to get rid of those blades asap. Do you think them not being in the house would help to reduce the temptation somewhat?
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No other sadness in the world would do
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25-10-2015, 10:06 PM
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#71
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.
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I agree, you don't want to make it easy for the temptations.
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Zelo zelatus sum pro Domino Deo exercituum.
Ying tong iddle ai po!
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26-10-2015, 12:10 AM
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#72
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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Originally Posted by Pi.R^2
Honestly I think you need to get rid of those blades asap. Do you think them not being in the house would help to reduce the temptation somewhat?
I am going to lock them in my outside shed until my cpn comes on Wednesday. I am going to put them in a box inside another box. It certainly helps with alcohol.
I got rid of the loose blades by chucking them in the bin. That bin bag got chucked in my wheelie bin. It shocked me how close I came to loosing it all. I really thought that I was over the urges but I am getting worse not better. So much so that I am considering IP.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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27-10-2015, 06:00 PM
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#73
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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I managed last night to lock away all the blades in the outside box last night. My cpn is coming tomorrow so hopefully she will take them off me.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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28-10-2015, 11:55 AM
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#74
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.
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good luck today
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Zelo zelatus sum pro Domino Deo exercituum.
Ying tong iddle ai po!
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28-10-2015, 01:40 PM
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#75
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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Thanks tamobhuuta.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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28-10-2015, 07:09 PM
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#76
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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I managed to give the blades to my cpn.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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29-10-2015, 08:33 PM
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#77
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.
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well done! how are you feeling?
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Zelo zelatus sum pro Domino Deo exercituum.
Ying tong iddle ai po!
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30-10-2015, 09:06 PM
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#78
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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Thanks tamobhuuta.
Tbh I am still struggling. I may not be able to cut right now but as people well know there are other ways to SI. I am thinking of other ways.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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31-10-2015, 06:37 PM
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#79
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.
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can you occupy yourself with other thoughts?
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Zelo zelatus sum pro Domino Deo exercituum.
Ying tong iddle ai po!
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31-10-2015, 09:28 PM
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#80
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It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:
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Originally Posted by tamobhuuta
can you occupy yourself with other thoughts?
I have been colouring as a distraction but I can't right now.
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Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
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