Yep, pretty much what other people have said...more convenient (for the actual cutting and for taking care of it after), and it is more satisfying for some reason. But I rarely do it because it is just too hard to hide and too obvious.
Oh and also, the first time I ever cut, I didn't even think of cutting anywhere else because the arms are just the stereotypical place to cut, you know?
Last edited by Belle. : 05-11-2007 at 07:05 PM.
Reason: Tip-sharing information.
Laura
"I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love." ~Mother Theresa
Whenever i cut now [which isnt often] its never a rational choice. I just do it. I dont think "oh, i'll cut my legs! Just for a change." There are other things going around my mind at the time, i dont really think about it.
I am constantly required to have exposed arms, with no option of hiding it, so I've only ever cut on my arms once or twice. Personally I prefer my arms though, for some reason I just like it better.
Some of us fall by the wayside
Some of us soar to the stars
Some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with the scars
It's more convenient. My arm is at the right height to reach comfortably with my other arm, closer to the position I'd be in if I'm writing notes or such, and since I spend a lot of time writing on something on a desk/table, but very little writing on my legs or stomach, I have better fine motor control that way, so it's easier to get the size of cuts I wanted, and there's less chance of slipping or whatever. Plus I'm usually wearing jeans, it it's a lot easier to just push up my sleeve than to take off my jeans or anything, and I never wanted to cut on my stomach, I think because it feels like it's a lot more vulnerable than cutting an extremity (closer to vital organs and such). When I tried to cut my legs once it was even harder, and it also took longer to heal, and had visible scars for a lot longer. Also, if someone does see cuts on my arms (which they generally don't unless I'm swimming or changing clothes, so they'd see if they were on my legs too), it's easier to explain away as cat/dog/rabbit scratches, or having scrapped my arm on something or whatever, whereas I hardly ever have accidental scratches/cuts at the tops of my legs. Although I never really think about that last part when I'm actually cutting, or deciding where to cut. Actually, I don't think about any of that when I'm deciding where to cut - it just feels right. I do think quite a bit about where on my arm I'm going to cut, but it's more like there are rules about it that are determined by how I'm going to cover it up later, or how I'm going to explain it, and I don't even consider cutting anywhere besides my arm. It's just the only place that feels "right." But I definitely do think a lot about where to cut, pretty calmly actually, although it's not entirely rational, but I sometimes even go as far as checking the weather forecast before I cut to make sure I'll be able to wear long sleeves, and depending on how I'll be able to cover it, I'll have rules for myself about having to fit under a single band-aid, not going past where a particular pair of arm warmers would cover, staying above where 3/4 length sleeves would come, and so on, but I don't even consider cutting somewhere other than my arm, or even cutting above the elbow (and recently I've even been avoiding cutting closer to my elbow because I've found it scars more there than further down, I think mainly because of how deep I have to cut different places).
I also think that part of it is that when I first started cutting, it was on my arms, so now it's what I'm used to, and I had somewhat different reasons back then. I think that when I first started cutting, I did want people to see it. Not because I wanted attention, but because I wanted help that I couldn't ask for. I usually can't initiate a conversation with someone about much of anything, and for a long time I didn't even answer direct questions a lot of the time. I don't know how to explain it really, but I just freeze up and can't say anything. Saying that I couldn't ask for help even though I had specific people who I was hoping would see the cuts and help me probably sounds strange to people who don't have that problem, like I should have been able to just say something to one of the people who I wanted to see the cuts, but I really couldn't do it, even though I wanted to. So of course I had to cut someplace where people could see it "by accident" when I was wearing a shirt that just barely covered the cuts, so when my sleeves were pushed up even just a little there would be a few cuts visible. No one noticed though. Most of the time I don't do that anymore - I'm an adult now, so even if someone did notice, all that they would do is recommend that I go to the health center and make a counseling appointment, which of course wouldn't help at all with the original problem of me not being able to ask for help that way - plus I'm seeing a psych now, who knows I cut, and my mom knows about it now (not just the cutting, but the stuff I wanted help with to begin with - she read my journal). But even still, there are times when I cut that it's partly because I want 'proof' of how I'm feeling, without having to explain it in words - like it's easier to answer honestly when my doctor asks me how much I've been cutting than when she asks how I've been feeling. There are also times when it's sort of like proof that I really do care about something that I don't think I did a good job on, even though tried my best, but I think it will look like I just wasn't trying hard enough, so it's kind of like 'look, I tried so hard that it hurt, and I hate myself for not being able to do it,' except of course I never show my cuts to the people I want to know that, but it's kind of like I know the proof is there, and I could push back my sleeve and show them if I needed to even though I also know that I never will and don't actually want to, it's more just that it makes me feel better to know that the message is there, but of course it wouldn't work if I cut someplace that had less risk of someone seeing it because then I wouldn't have the assurance that I could easily show them if I needed to. And that last sentence was grammatically horrible and probably makes no sense - sorry I can't figure out how to explain it coherently. It's just that sometimes I do want someone to see it sort of, even though I also don't want anyone to know, and it's not for attention at all (and, in fact, I've always done whatever I could to avoid any attention at all, even as a little kid, long before I started cutting), but it's kind of a way of saying something that I want someone to know but can't actually say. Even when I'm cutting purely for the release, and not at all because I want someone to see it, I think that a lot of the time it's still related to not being able to talk to people - I'm angry at myself for having stayed silent when I wanted to talk (in yet another class when I absolutely love the class and had things I wanted to say, or when I wanted to be friendly but couldn't show it, or I wanted to speak up about something but couldn't), or for staying in my room when I want to be participating in something that's going on but I can't make myself do it, or because I did say something and then I feel like an idiot for having said it and wished I'd stayed silent like normal (because it's safer), or because I avoided doing something I wanted or needed to do because I couldn't make myself do it, or because I couldn't think of anything to say when I needed to, and that kind of thing. So I think that most of the time there's that aspect to it that part of me does want someone to see it, because it's so much about not being able to communicate what I need to any other way, even when I'm not directly aware of that at all, and don't feel like there's any level at which I do want someone to see it. Sometimes it even seems stupid to me that I'm cutting someplace where there's so much risk of someone seeing it, but I still feel like I have to cut there and no where else.
Although, that's not the only reason I started out cutting on my arms rather than someplace else - the very first time I cut was purely because I was angry at myself, and I wanted to punish myself, but I remember that the reason that my arm seemed like the right place to cut was partly that I'd heard about cutting, and it was always on the left arm when I heard about it. Although having heard about it didn't influence me to cut - I felt like I had to hurt myself, and it wasn't that what I'd heard about cutting made it seem like it might help - but I do think it influenced where I choose to cut to some extent. So that's probably also part of why it ended up that my arm is where I'm used to cutting. It also just seemed like the obvious place, though, even without what I'd heard about cutting - it's just always been easier to kind of scratch/hit/pinch my other arm than to like undress so I could get at someplace else, and I'd been doing that kind of thing for a fair amount of time (I remember kind of scratching my other arm even in elementary school when I was struggling with a test or stuff), so it was just the obvious place to cut. It also kind of felt like less of a big deal, or like I didn't have to acknowledge it quite as much, if I was just reaching across to cut my arm than if I was like taking of my jeans to cut my legs or stuff. I don't know, I didn't really even think much about it at first, and it just seemed like the place to cut even before I started thinking about people seeing it or stuff.
And that ended up being really long, and probably pretty rambling and incoherent, so I'm not sure if anyone is actually going to want to read it or anything, but a lot of what I said about why I cut I hadn't even thought of that way before, so I think it helped me to write it, even if it is going to just take up space...
Last edited by Dreaming. : 05-11-2007 at 04:16 PM.
Reason: Removed potentially tip-sharing information
Emily
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(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.
I always did my legs so that I could just wear jeans and hide them. However, I did do my wrists a few times. That was because of an urge however. Those times, my legs weren't enough, and yeah, they were hard to hide. I had to wear long sleeves or else those sweatband bracelet things.
"I have this dream of being whole. Of not going to sleep each night wanting, but still sometimes, when the wind is warm or the crickets sing, I dream of a love that even time will lie down and be still for. I just want someone to love me. I want to be seen."
I was never going to cut on my arms...then I just got to the point where I didn't care any more. For me it's a sign of worsening depression, that something is different. The fact that I'm pretty flat now and I don't care much about anything makes it easier to cut where once I had sworn I wouldn't.
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
~ Marilyn Monroe
I've never thought about this before. For me it was always just where i did it. I have done it in other places but it's never the same. That sounds weird. I can't explain it.
Because I ran out of space on my legs. And when I started cutting deep it is easier to treat on the arms as when I'm walking it pulls it open again. With my arms I can close it myself or get it stitched and bandage it with relative ease.
What doesn't kill you can only **** you up for a really really long time...
As I'm sure you've realised, the moderating team have had to make a number of edits over the past couple of days due to a few cases of accidental, and purely unintentional, tip-sharing information being posted.
So - whilst I do appreciate how easy it can be - please take a moment to read through what you're posting before you send your reply. Anything that could encourage members to try harming themselves on another area of their body due to the physical effects that it may offer needs to be avoided at all costs and will be deleted immediately. It only takes a second and if you're ever unsure about something then you're always welcome to get in-touch with a member of the moderating team (see Staff Listings) and we'll get back to you as soon as possible - after all, it's always better to be safe than sorry.
the first time i ever cut its was on my arm. its always been the place of choice for me. it wasnt for a while after i did my legs then stomch.
sometimes i like to look at my arms. random maybe but yeah i like to see what ive done
When i first harmed i wasnt thinking of people seeing the cuts, i just wanted to feel realifed, but as time went by and my sgars got wors i now cut on my tummy, legs as they are easier to hide.
but yeah cutting the arm does feel better, in some way.
well i dance. ballet (y) so.. i first did a few on my arms,, but they werent really much more than scratches,, and they could be easily passed off. but then because of dance,, its now my thighs,, just because i really dont want anyone to find out. i sometimes burn my arms though,, just because theyre also easy to pass off. but yeh.. thighs. i still have to wear two pairs of dancing tights though ):
I won't say exactly why I cut my arms since I think it'd be considered encouraging/method sharing. But it just fits my "needs" better. I've tried a lot of different things all over my body, but the arms and hands are what really does it for me, other places don't affect me the same way.
Honestly? Convenience/bleeds more. S'about it. I tried other places that might've even been easier to hide, but the latter point ^^ stopped me from carrying on there,
"Be nice. Think happy thoughts. Champion silver linings. Love all things (not just cute things like babies and kittens) & when you do love - love like they do in power ballads (you know like on a cliff with the wind in your hair and your eyes shut, knowing you'll never know love like this). Watch out for dog poo. Smile at people - even grumpy ones. Remember anything is possible & whatever you do always try to look on the bright side."
When I started cutting I was on the swim/dive team at my school which meant always fairly exposed around other teenage girls. Since I didn't want to be caught I couldn't even cut my arms or legs so I started on my stomach, it was the next easiest to access and easiest to hide. I never understood arms anyways because it is so obvious there and that is where everyone expects it. Besides, even now that people know that I cut they can't look for new scars. With my friends who cut their arms, I always recognized the fresh scars. With me, the people who know don't say, "Ok, roll up your shirt so I can see if you've been cutting." It's overall easier--and I'll admit, I was pretty logical about it when I started because I was so terrified of being caught. In the end, though, I was found out, so maybe it didn't matter. But BTW, it's nice to know there are others who don't cut on their arms and others who don't "get" the arm thing.
When I started cutting I used to cut the tops of my legs, eventually it moved on to anywhere really, ankles, torso, stomach, and eventually to arms. In the end I always used to cut and burn my arms just because for some reason I always had the compulsion to do it there and out of ease I guess. I never had a problem hiding it really. Now that I haven't really S.I'd for a few years I wear whatever I like and people see the scars but it rarely gets mentioned. If I wanna S.I now, (which is rare) I cut my ankles, cos no-one ever notices there and I don't have to restrict my clothing.
I've been thinking about this a lot at the moment. I cut my arms, that's where i started. Everyone knows that i 'used' to cut so i don't need to hide the scars on my arms anymore and it didn't matter. Now that i've started again i tried cutting my legs so no one could possibly see it as i really really don't want anyone to find out. But i find that it doesn't feel the same, it just does't work as good for me so i have cut my arms a little when i really need to,but now i'm terrified someone will see all time. Thankfully it's winter so it's not very hard to hide but i'm dreading when it gets to summer, don't know what i'm gonna do. All the scars on my arms were still visible but had faded to white now i have red ones again, so it's really obvious that they're new ones. oh dear.
Life breaks most of us in the end, but afterwards some of us are strong in the broken places
~ Ernest Hemingway
