Psychology assessment outcome - Page 4

Merc · 18-09-2011, 12:22 AM

Can't add more to what's been suggested but I did want to say that there is nothing 'pathetic' about how you are feeling, Em! Not at all.
There are a lot of changes coming up for you, no wonder you are worried. I'd be terrified too, of going back to school.
BUT, I also do think you can manage it.
Pls do look into the DSA, the mentor, etc. The help is there for you...try to use it because you do deserve it.(Despite what your head is telling you after reading that!)
xx

Pomegranate · 19-09-2011, 04:02 AM

I'm sorry. Thanks for the advice.

've done something fairly stupidand it hasfreakedme out. I cut to make sure my grandmothers were ok. Itwas not enough so i cut somewhere different from normal. I know I am ****ing stupid. ****.... I Know how irritated anyone else typing this would make me. I am really sorry. I am petrified of a+e, I hardly ever go. I am more than happy ofdealing with the consequences of that normally. Ifyou know me 'in real life' then you would know that to look at me, there is nothing wrong. My scars are always VERY carefully covered. I smile. Nobody would know...well....at least I mean I cover my scars.

For the first time in 10 years I broke this. I have cut my hand badly...more tha once. Not as badly as my 'usual' but badly enough that I know techincally I need at least two stitched up. I am so ANGRY with myself. I will get them seen to. I can't cope with explaining the resulting scars with people otherwise....I can't hide them forever. I am terrified of medical treatment for wounds though.

I really am SO SORRY. I know this is all my fault,,y decision, choice etc. Could I please have some encouragement or support with the treatment thing though? I know I was bloody stupid to do it, I have NEVER done it somewhere so obvious....ever. I just, well....ran out of 'clean' space on my arms and my legs did not feel 'right' tonight. I am sorry. I really am....I know I am pathetic. I am really scared though. What the hell do I tell people??? I have to get them closed or it will be really bloody obvious forever. I am terrified of going though.

I know....consequences and actions.....Please believe me...I am already beating myself up more than anyone else possibly could. Could I please just have some support or hugs or something? I am really scared of this. A+E/treatment is a HUGE trigger of mine. I'm sorry. Honestly...I am. Sorry.

19-09-2011, 07:30 AM

Em chick try not to think long term right now just think of going n getting it closed u can do this chick if neone can u can let me know how u get on hugs xxc

Too Shy · 19-09-2011, 10:43 AM

*Hugs*

You can do this, you'll get through it. You're doing the right thing in deciding to get treatment - and however scary it is at the moment, in the long term it will be much better for you.

I've hurt myself in the same place before, although not so badly, but I do understand the worry that it's somewhere very 'obvious'. Don't beat yourself up for it though, there's no 'right' or 'wrong' places to do it.

Thinking of you x

Pomegranate · 19-09-2011, 05:11 PM

Thank you so much :)

I saw social worker and cried at her for an hour and then took myself to the minor injuries unit. The nurse was lovely and it is all sorted now. Just need to figure out whether to invest in fingerless gloves or something or try and come up with a plausible excuse. Thanks again.