Chapter 174
The photos got passed around and the whole group had a good look at them. Bob was the next person to look at the photos,
“I can’t believe he…..Can you believe…?” He looked up at the group, barely able to put his sentence together.
“Come on Bob, how long have we known Tom? You know what he’s like!” Laughed Ray, taking the pictures from Bob’s hands and looking at them with Pembe,
“Actually on second thoughts….” Ray trailed off too. The group had only had a quick glance when Bill had waved them around. Looking close up was a completely different story.
“Oh c’mon they can’t be that bad.” Laughed Gerard, taking the pictures next and looking at them with Frank. Franks eyes widened as he looked at them. He turned to Gerard,
“If you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking then no way!” Said Gerard, scooting further down the couch to get away from him.
The whole group laughed and Frank looked innocently up at them,
“What? I didn’t say anything.”
“It wasn’t what you said it’s what you were thinking.” Laughed Gerard, “I’m hiding the camera when we get home. I’m not letting you anywhere near it.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Said Frank, turning a deep shade of red, he turned to Bill quickly, “Has Tom text back yet?”
Bill checked his phone in case they hadn’t heard it over the group.
“No not yet. I’ll phone him in a bit if he doesn’t text back.”
Mikey made a grab for the photos next but Gerard held them out of his reach.
“I can’t let you see the pics Mikes. Sorry. What sort of big brother would it make me?”
“Give me the pictures or I’ll set Hannah and Amy on you.” He said half joking.
Gerard threw the photos to him quickly and moved back next to Frank.
“No way! Hormonal Frankie was bad enough. Two hormonal girls? No thanks.”
He quickly buried his head in Franks shoulder as the two girls glared at him. Mikey handed the photo’s back to Bill. He’d found them pretty weird to look at. Seeing his best friend in like that creeped him out a little.
The group went quiet when they heard a faint cry from one of the upstairs rooms. They’d put Jaidon up there so the group didn’t wake him up. Frank went to moved to go and see to him,
“I’ll go!!” Said Hannah quickly, getting up,
“Me too!” Said Amy.
They’d been looking forward to seeing Jaidon and holding him and stuff, since their babies weren’t here yet. They left the room to go and see to him as quickly as they could, which wasn’t very fast with how far gone they were. When they’d left the room, Frank and Gerard turned to Bill and Mikey,
“Looking forward to your own?” Asked Gerard grinning. They hadn’t really talked to the other guys about the babies not since they’d had their own anyway.
“Yeah I can’t wait!” Grinned Bill, he hadn’t been thinking about much else really. Just about him and Amy and their future. He smiled to himself,
“How bout you Mikes?”
“Hell yeah! I’m gonna teach her kickball and everything!”
“Mikey you can’t play kickball!”
“I’ve been down with kickball since the third grade!”
The group laughed once more. Bill calmed himself down and took his phone out again,
“Someone go and get the girls, I’m gonna ring Tom.” He smirked
Chapter 175 The girls were back in the living room within seconds and Bill was dialing his twins number. It started ringing and Bill put the phone onto speaker. "Kaulitz"
"Tom its me" said Bill, eyeing the group up. They all saw the evil glint in his eye. "Hey whats up bro"
"Just to let you know you left your camera here, wandering if you wanted me to get it developed, its in the top drawer right?" "Ermm… no thanks, ill do it when I get back… y’know and yeh anything else?"
"It’ll be no problem" "No no no, its okay!"
"Oh" Bill smiled "We’ve all seen the pictures anyway" "WHAAT?"
"Didn’t know you had it in you bro!" Bill said giggling slightly. "BILLLLL! WHATTHE****MAN!"
"Hey we’re twins! What yours is mine, and whats mine is yours" "Ill remember than next time you want hairspray"
"You don’t even use hairspray Tom" "Who said it was for my hair?" "I hate you"
"Hate you too" "Arshloch" "Oi don’t call me a ****er!"
"Leave my hairspray alone then"
By now the whole group was in hysterics at the twins arguing. They all had to admit although it was rare, when the twins did fight, it was hilarious.
Bill glared at them all but it only made them laugh more.
The phone call ended with more ‘I hate yous’ Everyone knew the twins didn’t mean it. They were too damn close.
The group chatted some more after the pictures had been put away, but Frank yawned and Gerard decided it was best that they go home.
They arrived home within the hour and Frank put Jaidon to bed – he was just as teird as his parents.
Frank collapsed on the sofa next to Gerard and laid his head on his shoulder. Frank looked up into his eyes. He could stare into his eyes all day. Slowly he lifted his head up and brushed his lips against Gerards closing his eyes.
Gerard kissed back and slowly pulled Frank onto his knee. Frank straddled Gerard as he snaked his arms around Gerards neck and Gerard arms were rounds Franks waist pulling him close and occasionally sneaking their way up Franks top, massaging his smooth skin as the kiss intensified.
Within seconds there was a pile of clothes on the living room floor and the two boys naked bodies were grinding against each other. Gerard broke away from the kiss and looked into his lovers eyes. "The lube and condom are in the bedroom"
Frank shook his head "I don’t care, just stick it in"
Gerard giggled and attacked Franks neck with his lips, Frank moaned and he felt Gerard slowly enter him. Franks had explored Gerard as he thrust in and out whilst his mouth was still attached to Franks neck. Gerards thrusts got more intense and went faster and harder when Frank instructed. Within minutes both boys came and lay together in a sweaty pile of limbs.
They lay there holding hands and life was perfect.
DILLIGAF
"it’s when you’re acting selflessly, that you are at your bravest"
- Four.
♥
Chapter 176
The two of them must have fallen asleep pretty much straight after because Gerard opened his eyes first and heard cries coming from Jaidons room and it was starting to get light again ourside. Groaning slightly, he slid off the couch and pulled his clothes on from the night before, and then headed off to see to the baby. He came back half an hour later to find Frank still in the same position, breathing lightly in his sleep. He smiled softly at his fiancée and got a blanket from their room to put over him. He got himself a cup of coffee and sat down carefully next to Frank, putting the TV on quietly and settling on a channel.
“You have boring taste in TV” Mumbled Frank sleepily
“Sorry Frankie, I thought you were asleep.” Replied Gerard, stroking his hair softly,
“I was. You woke me up when you put the blanket on me.”
“Sorry Frankie. How you feeling anyway?”
“Sore.”
“I told you the lube was in the bedroom but you said no.”
Franks eyes widened as he remembered the night before. It wasn’t just lube they hadn’t used. Gerard noticed his face and worried slightly,
“Frankie, what’s wrong?”
“I…err…nothing. I’m just tired that’s all.” Lied Frank. He felt a pang of guilt. They’d promised each other time and again that they wouldn’t lie to each other and they wouldn’t keep secrets and here he was lying again.
“I think I’m gonna go to bed. Wake me up in an hour or something?”
Gerard nodded and kissed him before watching Frank walk out of the room. He was worried about him. He had a feeling Frank was keeping something from him but he didn’t want to jump to conclusions. That wouldn’t be fair on Frank. Gerard leant back and closed his eyes. It was just the trust issues again. Frank wouldn’t keeo anything from him. Not after all they’d been through.
Frank climbed under the covers and lay there. He wasn’t tired anymore. He just needed time alone to think. He lay there staring at the ceiling and remembered the night before “The lube and condom are in the bedroom" "I don’t care, just stick it in"
What the hell had he been thinking. He heard Jaidon start crying again and listened as Gerard walked past their room to go to him. He waited until Gerard had settled Jaidon back down and then took a deep breath,
“Gee?”
Gerard walked into the room and sat down on the bed next to him, “Yeah Frankie?”
“You really do love me don’t you? I mean after everything we’ve been through?”
“Of course I do Frankie. I love you more than anything, well, except Jaidon but that’s a different kind of love.”
“And you know I’d never intentionally do anything to hurt you or upset you?”
“I know Frankie. What’s brought this on? You’ve been acting weird since you woke up.”
“Nothing. I just felt insecure for a minute that’s all.”
“Aww Frank. You don’t need to feel that way. I’ll always love you and be here for you. No matter what happens okay?”
Frank smiled as they cuddled. He didn’t have anything to worry about, he was probably just being stupid.
A few days later, Frank was lying in bed. Gerard wasn’t there. He’d gone to see the others. Frank had been to tired to go, he’d been getting up in the night to see to Jaidon, since Gerard had done it so much at the beginning, so Gerard and their son had both left him to get some rest. He leaned over and picked up his phone. It was just after midday, unusual for him to sleep in so late. He got slowly out of bed and grabbed for the wall instinctively as a wave of nausea washed over him. He made his way slowly to the bathroom and dropped to his knees. He got there just in time to empty the contents of his stomach into the toilet. His stomach was hurting from how much he’d been sick. He sat there for a little while, scared to get up. Using the sink to lever himself up, he shakily made his way back to the bedroom and lay back down. He couldn’t think straight. He was confused. He got up again and pulled some clothes on, grabbed his phone, keys and wallet and headed out the door. He made his way into town and straight to that place. The one he would always remember. He pulled his hoodie up and went inside to make his purchase before rushing straight back home. He sat down and stared at the bag in his hand. He had to know one way or the other.
Chapter 177 Frank looked down at the stick in his hand. His eyes wide and his hands shaking. It couldn’t be true. It couldn’t be! But the fact was staring up at him as clear as day. He felt a single tear fall down from his face and splash on the cool bathroom tiles.
Frank closed his eyes. Wishing it all away. Wishing it were a dream.
He opened his eyes a few minutes later and looked at the offending object in his hands.
Nothing had changed. It still said the same.
Frank felt more tears falling.
He closed his eyes and slide down the wall to the cool tiled floor. He put his head in his hands and sobbed.
Over at the Kaulitz house the group were laughing and joking. The girls were trying to see who could balance a glass on their stomach the longest. The guys were making bets. Mikey was claiming Hannah would win because Amy had two babies therefore more limbs to knock the glass over. Meanwhile Bill was betting Hannah would win because with twice the number of babies, Amy would be able to balance it more because it had more limbs to hold it up.
They gave up after half an hour declaring it a draw.
"We need to get out more" laughed Bob as the glasses were placed on the floor.
"Well we would but we’ve been banned" pouted Hannah as she crossed her arms.
"Yeh, guys cant we please go out? Just to the cinema or something?"
"NO" shouted Bill and Mikey simutaneously.
Gerard giggled. He had been exactly the same with Frank. He understood were the boys were coming from. The girls just pouted.
"Fine! We’re going upstairs to do GIRL stuff" said Amy getting up.
"Fine we don’t wanna do girl stuff" said Mikey sticking his tongue out"
"Ok we’ll just make out, that’s classed as girl stuff" laughed Hannah as she and Amy waddled out the room as fast as they could.
Bill and Mikey looked at each other and ran after them shouting at them to wait for them.
They reached the room and found Amy and Hannah lying on the bed in hysterics.
"So not funny" pouted Mikey
Bill just rolled his eyes. "Dude, leave the pouting to me, yeh?"
Mikey frowned and walked back to the living room, followed by a laughing Bill.
"What’s so funny?" asked Gerard when they sat down.
"Mikey can’t pout!" said Bill going into another fit of hysterics.
"I so can!" declared Mikey before continuing to do a serious of pouting faces causing the whole group to go into a fit of hysterics.
Frank didn’t know how long he had been sat on the bathroom floor, but he was sure it had been a fair few hours. The sun had gone down and the bright moon was shining through the light night time clouds. Frank got up and walked over to the window and opened it. He looked out over the city and wished that this moment in time, he was someone else. One of those people. One of those people he and Gerard watched from the roof top. For once, he wished he was living someone else’s life. For once, he wished he wasn’t him.
DILLIGAF
"it’s when you’re acting selflessly, that you are at your bravest"
- Four.
♥
Chapter 178
Frank walked around to the other side of the house and climbed out through the window and onto the roof. He took in the familiar sight. It was normally comforting to be able to see everything. Everyone’s houses who he cared for. But not tonight. Every family walking by or going past in a car, every house, every little light glowing in the distance reminded Frank of the situation he was in. It wasn’t fair. None of it was. He was sure to lose Gerard this time and it hurt him. Because if he lost Gerard it wouldn’t just be for a life time. It would be for eternity. He’d be alone for eternity because there was no way he’d ever love anyone like he loved Gerard. He thought about Jaidon. Barely even a month old. They could only just afford to keep themselves now, without another baby to think of. He looked down as he heard the car pull onto the drive and watched Gerard get out and carefully lift their son into his arms, before locking the car and heading inside.
Gerard walked into the house. It was dark which meant Frank would still be asleep. He continued through the house and settled Jaidon down to sleep before heading into their room. He saw the empty bed and rushed back out to the front of the house. He didn’t know what made him do it, but he looked up and saw the familiar figure on the roof. He went back through the house once more and carefully climbed out onto the roof and sat next to Frank.
“Hey baby, feeling any better?”
“No not really. I thought coming out here might make me feel better but….” Frank trailed off, tears cascading down his face. Gerard pulled him close,
“Frankie, please tell me what’s going on, you’ve been like this for days now. Honestly, anyone would think you’re pregnant again.”
Frank froze and stayed silent. Gerard was sure to figure it out now. His silence gave him away more than anything he could’ve said. He heard Gerard giggle slightly.
“I mean yeah eventually, maybe another one would be a nice idea, but I mean in a few years. There’s no way we could have another one yet.”
Frank still said nothing and Gerard took his silence to mean he was tired and didn’t want to talk.
Later that night, the two of them were in bed together. Gerard was fast asleep next to Frank. Frank watched him and took in every detail of his face. He hated him. Hated him for being so trusting, hated him for being so caring, hated him for failing to notice when Frank was lying. But he loved him so much and that was why it hurt. Frank looked up instinctively as he heard Jaidon crying. Gerard stirred slightly,
“No Gee, go back to sleep. I’ll go to him.”
Gerard mumbled sleepily and turned over.
Frank walked quietly into Jaidon's room and carried him out to the living room. He didn’t need feeding, he was just crying for attention. Frank cradled the baby in his arms. Everything had been so perfect and now he, Frank Iero, was about to ruin it once more. Frank put Jaidon down to sleep once he’d settled again, then he pulled some more clothes on and left. He needed a walk, to clear his head and get away from things for an hour or two.
He didn’t know where he was going, he walked through the cemetery where he’d first seen the group feeding, he walked through the park, past each member of the groups’ house and finally back home again. The sun was just starting to rise now. Gerard had been right, he didn’t need sleep, he felt just the same as if he’d slept all night. He went up onto the roof to watch the sunrise properly and when it was a decent enough time, he took his phone out of his pocket and phoned the doctor. He didn’t want to leave it til the last minute like last time.
Gerard woke up to an empty space next to him. It was getting to be quit regular and it worried him slightly. He didn’t panic like he had been doing, instead he pulled some jeans on and walked through the house, to find Frank sitting down in the kitchen.
“How long have you been up?” He asked, planting a kiss on the top of his fiancées head before sitting next to him.
“Most of the night. I couldn’t sleep so I saw to Jaidon and went out for a walk.”
“Ok Frankie, you know I’m here for you right, if there’s anything you need to talk about.”
Frank nodded guiltily. If only Gerard knew.
“I’ve gotta pop out again in a bit. Just for half an hour, that ok?”
“Sure it is.” Smiled Gerard. He knew Frank needed space right now. He was probably still a bit upset about the other day back with their moms.
Frank got up and left the table without saying a word and walked out of the house. Half an hour later, he was stood outside the doctors with a piece of paper in his hand. He didn’t know how a piece of paper this small could destroy everything he had, but it surely would. He walked slowly back home and as he entered the house, he folded the piece of paper and put it in the pocket of his hoodie. Gerard wasn’t about so Frank guessed he was seeing to Jaidon. Frank took his hoodie off and laid it over the back of the couch before heading upstairs. He took his phone out and noticed a message from Gerard saying he’d gone to see the others and he wouldn’t be long. Frank set his phone down next to the bed and lay down.
He opened his eyes when he heard the familiar crying sound. He got up and walked in the direction of the sound. He could see Gerard standing there, back to him completely ignoring the baby’s cries.
“Gerard what the hell are you doing? Jaidon is right next to you crying his eyes out and you’re….”
Frank trailed off as Gerard slowly turned to face him, looking completely emotionless. He got up slowly and made his way to Frank shakily. Frank looked down at Gerard hand and saw the familiar piece of paper and felt the colour drain from his face. He looked back up again as Gerard moved ever closer to him. This couldn’t be good.
Chapter 179 Amy and Bill said goodnight to Mikey and Hannah as they waved goodbye and went to the car. Bill closed the door and smiled. "Today was fun"
Amy nodded "Yeah" she said trying to surpress a yawn as she went at sat on the couch. Bill walked over and sat next to her placing his arm around her shoulders, she automatically cuddled up.
"You know, we ought to start thinking of names" said Bill placing his other hand on her swollen stomach.
"Yeh I know, ive been thinking and I really like this one name…" said Amy entwining her hand with Bills.
"What is it?" asked Bill pulling his fiancée closer.
"Dakota" she smiled and looked up at Bill. He smiled too.
"I like it" he said "Ive been thinking too, and Theres this one I really like aswell…"
"Really?" she asked, she didn’t know what she was that surprised really.
"Yeh, wanna know what it is?"
Amy nodded enthusiastically.
"Cobie"
"I love it!" Amy beamed
"So is that decided then? Dakota and Cobie?" said Bill looking down on his girlfriend as she snuggled her head into his chest. She nodded. "Yeh I like those names"
Bill smiled. He could tell she was teird. He was the only one who could read her like a book. Tell what she was thinking and what she was feeling without her saying a word.
"Come on lets get you to bed" he said getting up and helping Amy up and walked her to the bedroom, he carefully helped her get undressed. With her swollen stomach she was finding it impossible sort out her trousers. Her stomach was extra large with the twins, she thought Frank had it bad, but this was just pure annoying.
Once she was into her PJ’s which consisted of one of Toms over sized t-shirts and a pair of Bills boxers, she lay on the bed and was asleep within minutes.
Bill smiled and shed his clothes before turning off the light and climbing into the bed. He gently placed an arm around Amy. She instinctively turned around and snuggled upto Bill and burried her face in his chest. He smiled and wrapped his other arm around her and closed his eyes.
"I love you" he whispered into her hair before gently kissing the top of her head before drifting off too a peaceful sleep.
Mikey and Hannah arrived home later than planned because Hannah had decided an unscheduled stopped at the store was needed because she had a huge craving for chocolate pudding. She ate it happily in the car and they pulled into the driveway. Mikey got out the car first before going round and opening Hannah’s door and helping her out and into the driveway.
They went inside the house and went straight to the bedroom. Hannah looked so teird. Mikey could tell this pregnancy was really taking its toll on her body. Amy had looked the same. So did Frank when he was pregnant.
Mikey never knew pregnancy took this much out of someone. All they had been doing today was just sitting around talking, nothing major, but yet both girls were exhausted. Guess its something he’d never find out what its like, and to be honest he didn’t really want too.
He and Hannah shed their clothes and got changed into their night stuff before settling down in the bed. Hannah placed her head on Mikeys chest and closed her eyes, soon she was happily in a deep sleep.
Mikey smiled against Hannah’s hair and kissed the top of her head. "I love you" he breathed before drifting off to sleep.
"I love you too" Hannah whispered smiling to herself.
DILLIGAF
"it’s when you’re acting selflessly, that you are at your bravest"
- Four.
♥
Chapter 180
Frank flinched away slightly. He didn’t know why but he’d had a horrible feeling that Gerard was going to hit him or something. Maybe it was because the last time Gerard had reacted in this way was when he’d walked in on Frank and Tom. Frank closed his eyes and waited, but it didn’t come. The crying had stopped, the room was silent. He opened his eyes and saw Gerard sitting on the couch holding Jaidon in his arms, tears falling down his face. Frank hesitated slightly before sitting down carefully next to him. He watched him for a few seconds, not quite knowing what to do.
“Gee, I…I was going to tell you I swear.”
Gerard didn’t say anything, he got up off the couch and carried their son into his room to put him down to sleep. He came back out a few minutes later and threw the piece of paper down in front of Frank, before sitting down at the other end of the couch.
“Why Frank? After all we promised each other, why do you do it? How can you live with lying and sneaking around because it damn near killed me when I was hiding my feelings for you.”
“You think I find it easy Gee? It’s tearing me apart inside. I’ve never been this scared in my life. I found out yesterday before you got back. At least I didn’t keep it to myself as long as last time.”
“Because I found you out….”
“No, I would have told you. You weren’t even here when I got back, Gee listen, I never meant for it to happen but it has and we’ve got to deal with it.”
Gerard stared at his fiancée. All the stuff they’d been through had really toughened him up, he didn’t take anyone else’s **** anymore.
“Frank, we can’t have another baby yet, we just can’t. We can’t afford it.”
“I know, I never planned for this to happen.”
“Frank I mentioned using protection, you were the one who said ‘I don’t care just stick it in’”
“And you didn’t waste any time did you? You could’ve stopped but you didn’t. Why do you do this to me Gee? Why do you push the blame on me all the time?”
Gerard didn’t answer. He held his head in his hands. It was like the tables had turned, Frank was the strong one and Gerard was the fragile, broken one. Frank couldn’t bear it.
“Gee if you can’t trust me or you doubt me or you want to call the whole thing off, I’ll grab some things and go.”
“No….No Frank. I love you so much. I just don’t know why you don’t talk to me. Why do you keep things from me? Are you scared of me or something?” Gerard looked up with fear in his eyes,
“I’m not scared of you, I’m scared of losing you. Last night you said we’d get through anything, no matter what, you’ll always be here. Sometimes it feels like the next thing to go wrong and you’ll walk out without a second glance.”
“Frank I would never do that to you. Or Jaidon.”
“What if we didn’t have Jaidon?”
“I still wouldn’t” Said Gerard quietly before getting up.
“Where are you going?”
“I need some air. You can come with me if you want, I’m not bothered.”
Gerard and Frank made their way up onto the roof and sat in their familiar spot, both consumed by their own thoughts. The arguments were getting so frequent now. They weren’t talking properly, they were keeping secrets, in a way it felt like their whole relationship was based on lies and secrets.
“Frank, we can’t go on like this.”
“So you do want me to go.” Said Frank, getting up quickly.
“No!” Said Gerard, grabbing his arm and pulling him back down, “I mean the way we are now. The arguing, the lies, the secrets. It’s got to stop completely because if it doesn’t it’s not just us that are going to suffer, it’s Jaidon too and…” Gerard trailed off but looked down at Franks stomach.
“But how is it going to stop Gee? We promise each other all the time and nothing changes.”
“Well, I think we should go away, like we planned. Just the three of us. We won’t talk about you being pregnant or any of the **** we’ve gone through, we’ll just be a family and have a break. Then we’ll come back and start a clean slate. No lies, no deceit nothing ok? And then we’ll deal with our new little problem.”
“You really think that’ll work?”
“It has to Frank cuz we’re running out of options.”
