its a weird one, i also am suprised how many people have said no but im goign to say pretty much the same.
yes i regret that the things that have led to it, the depressive states and i regret the scars in a way, that i cant wear things i want to
but i dont regret it in another way, if i hadnt hurty myself i dont think i would have ever asked for help, if it was purley mental and no physical effects i would still be here with no hope for help
i regret the things ive lost, i regret the pain ive caused others but essentially its part of me, the scars are part of me and ive always known i was 'different' it just gave me a way to carry on
btw im 28 so i started when i was 12ish so its not an age thing
Like Flem said, I don't regret it because of the people it's brought me closer to, I've been some amazing relationships with some awesome people because of a bond we share, and because they're frickin' awesome. I would never have met half of my friends without RYL, and I think some of the friends I met outside of it, I only have such close bonds with because we've both been through self harm.
In addition to that, even without self harm I would still have had all these emotions that I was feeling, and would have been unable to deal with them, with anxiety and misery and such. I don't want to think about how things would have gone if I'd never let myself cut.
On the other hand I now have a ton of horrific scars, and a whole bunch of problems they cause. I can't go on holiday with my family surfing, and I love surfing, and when I go on holiday with them I'm deprived of going in the sea unless I cover myself up with rash vests and arm bands and ****. If it's horribly sunny then I'm stuck covering myself up on my arms, and there's nothing I can do about it. When i go out with friends to a club there are certain scars I have to cover up also.
I am never free to just dress a way I want to without having to include cover ups. Mainly I regret scars, one in particular on my upper arm. And in all fairness I love some of my scars in a sick way, which makes me regret them less.
no. im certain that if i had never started then i wouldnt be alive today. im proud of it because although its not the best way to deal with emotions, its better than suicide.
You called me an angel, there must be a twist,
Have you ever seen an angel with scars on her wrist?
And blood trickling down from a gash on her arm,
Have you ever seen an angel self harm?-Unknown
Now? no. I don't regret starting. As someone else said, I regret having to damage my body as a way of coping. I regret not speaking out before it reached that point. I'm happy at what I have achieved now - the things and people I know. The way I see things and the way I act. I'm proud of that, and that came from 3 years of harming.
No, you cant change the past so why waste your time regretting, why not try and stop instead of regretting. If you regrett it so much then you can learn to change.
"Its not how long a star shines, what is remembered is the brightness of the light"
I don't regret it. My battle with SI has shown me that I do have the courage to speak up and admit I've done something wrong or taken something too far and I have the dignity to take my consequences (court mandated treatment/ not being able to go to uni for a year) gracefully. Although it's hard, it's shown me I have the strength to beat it and become something more.
"Life is easy to chronicle, but bewildering to practice."-- E.M. Forster
I regret it, but only on some parts of my body, without it I'mnot sure I'd be here, but it has caused others a lot of hurt and stuff, and also got me into lots of trouble.
But no I don't regret starting... Just regret doing it on exposed parts of my body and such. Aye, if I make sense.
~Beauty without intellence, is a materpiece painted on a napkin.~
A thousand mile journey starts with the first step
Join Date: Oct 2009
I am currently:
As people have said, part of me does regret starting, and I wish I could've found a way to deal with what I was going through at the time... And constantly being scared that someday I may get triggered and it'll start again.
But sometimes I don't regret it, because it showed me who my true friends were, in terms of them being there for me through the tough times, and who would try and understand and who wouldn't be bothered. And I like to think it's made me stronger and that I've grown as a person, and that people who are in the same position as me I can help better because I understand what they're going through and empathise with.
I do; of course I hate what it's done to my body and confidence, and I probably wouldn't have an ED which is now ruinin my life if I didn't self harm. But in a way, I'm gratefl for the experiences that I have had thanks to the SH. I've matured, met some amazing people (yes, I mean you lot :P), and seen who I can really trust. Also the first aid experience has come in handy :P So yeah, I'm mixed.
we are the fallen
we are the wounded
we are the shattered
we are the unheard
we are the brave
we are the strong we are Survivors. and..... we are the future
we fallen can still rise by the wings of hope that lifts us~
A lot of people have said SI made them who they are today, but mine was the other way aroud. Because of who I am - uncompromisingly honest, to the point of being abrassive with people, and incredibly stubborn and independant - I alienated myself, and didn't ask for help when I needed it, so SI was my only relief.
I don't really have any obvious scars either, so I don't regret damaging my body permanently.
I guess I regret that I couldn't cope better back then. And that I made it so hard for myself.
I regret it because of the immense scaring, and having to lie to people all the time. Yet I don't regret it, because its just how I deal with things, and I have matured and I now look at the world in a different light.
Every corner of my mind is filled with spiderwebs and Fear.
