Triggering (SI) - Why do YOU self harm? - Page 3

jaybird · 18-07-2010, 03:16 AM

I SI because it makes me feel better. My kids get me upset. My husband gets mad. Or my past comes up and this is the only way I can let it go. Cutting, burning or slaming my head stops the pain I am feeling. There is no SI pain. That is the weird thing about all of this.

Celticroots · 09-08-2010, 11:51 PM

My reasons:
.SI calms me down when I am anxious
. It's something I can control
.Physical pain is easier to deal with than emotional pain, and blocks out emotional pain
. I cut/hit/bang my head to punish myself
. My emotional pain is valid when I SI.

Amour · 11-08-2010, 10:00 PM

To calm myself down I guess.

JaffaCake. · 12-08-2010, 12:28 AM

i could say i have many reasons but each one to me would seem invalid because it would be a lie.

in all honesty, i like doing it.
the release, the blood, the satisfaction of seeing a wound and knowing i did it myself makes me feel better.

it also helps because i'm **** at letting people know how i feel.
self-harm so my pain in a physical way.

I am (not) a robot · 12-08-2010, 12:56 AM

I self harm to "break" the cycle of panic. It calms me down when I can't get a grip.

Detour. Derail · 12-08-2010, 01:23 AM

Because I hate myself. Because I could never ever hate anyone else more than I hate me.
Because my mum openly expresses how she never wanted me...how she had an abortion booked but my nana stopped her.
Because an ex used to hit me.
Because I feel isolated.
Because I feel dead inside and the pain reminds me Im alive....for a breif moment in time Im alive.
Because what else do I have?

001100111 · 12-08-2010, 01:31 AM

its a way to break a pattern.
break the panic, break the flashbacks, break the fear.
rip attention away from things i don't want to focus on.

Haleigh.xx · 12-08-2010, 06:33 AM

It's a release for me when I'm feeling a really strong emotion that I don't know how to deal with. If I feel a panic attack coming on, I'll do it to prevent it. I especially do it when there's a situation that I can't control. I get so frustrated that I want to scream, run, punch stuff, basically I completely lose it. (I can't really run around my house screaming and punching stuff though, can I?) More and more often though I find myself doing it as a sort of punishment. If I'm feeling really low about myself I'll do it.

Sprinkles · 12-08-2010, 10:23 AM

it's because i miss my best friend

Winchester Angel · 12-08-2010, 10:29 AM

after self harming for 12 years I dont know why i do it anymore, to cope i guess but without it i feel like i cant breathe like the whole sky is faling in on me.

BeautifulxInsecurity · 12-08-2010, 10:33 AM

I self harm because it's the only thing that helps
after years of crying in my bed, I couldn't find a release for my pain in crying anymore.
+ I hate myself and my body.

~.Ilyssya.~ · 12-08-2010, 04:34 PM

I could say that it made me feel better or it helped calm me down but it didn't. To this day I dont have a freaking clue what drove me to do it so many times.
I used to cut when I felt like a failure, I was never good enough, but then after I had cut I would feel even worse. So I guess it was just a messed up addiction for me.

misskitty112 · 13-08-2010, 05:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RaynieRose

How terrible is it that I can't give a straight reason why I self harm?

This. I can give you incidents in which I would self harm... but I can't for the life of me, pinpoint the emotions behind it.

I guess that's what happens after 12 years of relying on it though...