1. List the ways that you self-harm
Cutting, scratching, biting.
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
Because it distracts me from all the emotional pain and abuse I've experienced.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
It just makes me feel as if I have absolute control over my body.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
I don't really know. I'm in pain and that's all I seem to think about.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
I don't know. Maybe it's just retaliation against myself and mistakes I've made.
6. How does this behavior punish me?
It makes me crave pain. It scars me. When it scars me I'm forced to be reminded of all the times I ****ed up.
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
I started when I was about ten. I was getting bullied and my parents were verbally and emotionally abusing me.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
I honestly don't know.
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to show that I own my body
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I believe my body is a battleground
I want to cleanse myself
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am taking over where my abuser left off
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Listen to music/play music.
2. Take a long walk outside.
3. Writing.
Which of the following are true for you?
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery? (see hidden information for the stages and details of each)
Around Stage 2.
It makes me feel alive again. Not empty or drained.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
I can control the pain that I inflict upon myself. No-one else can hurt me as much as I hurt myself.
It gives me a regained control of my mood and emotions. I calm down.
It makes the other hurt go away.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
It gives me a sense of release and I feel relieved or alive. They stress goes down.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
It doesn't
6. How does this behavior punish me?
It stops me feeling good. I don't deserve it.
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
2007 scatching , ODing and cutting- Moving away from where I knew and starting again. Then moving back. I couldn't adapt or express how I felt.
2009 - Burning and hitting aswell.
2010 - Plucking - Trying to stop again.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
It just does - I don't know how , it's not logical I know that , but afterwards I feel happy or relieved.
Like the pressure guage has gone down , I feel a lot calmer and in control.
I can express , in some form , how I feel for once.
For a while I concentrate on soemthing else , till I feel guilty.
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I want to cleanse myself
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to manage my flashbacks/memories
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1.Talk to someone
2.Listen to music
3.Write my feelings , be it in lyrics or draw. Be creative.
Which of the following are true for you?
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
It keeps people away
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery?
Stage 2 and 3
It may not be pleasant ; but it's always possible - Brian Molko ♥
I was filled with incoherence .Theories of conspiracy .The whole world wants my disappearance, I'll go fighting nail and teeth .You've never seen such perseverance .Gonna make you scared of me,'Cause haemoglobin is the key - Placebo♥
1. List the ways that you self-harm. Cutting
Banging my head
Occasionally ODing
Eating problems
2. How do these behaviors help you survive? They help me to calm down when I'm angry
They help me to feel like I'm achieving something
They help me to feel something when I'm really low
They help me to release frustration
They help me to feel like I have control
They help me have something to focus on, so I don't think about the real issues
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control? I am choosing how I feel. I am in control of the way I act. No one else can force me to eat, I am choosing not to do it and for a while I feel in control of that.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better? For a short time it makes me feel better. It gives me a kind of adrenaline rush and I feel a kind of release. In the long term, it doesn't, I just feel pathetic and guilty.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge? Sometimes it helps me to feel better because I am angry with myself and hating myself, and I feel like I deserve to hurt myself.
6. How does this behavior punish me? Same as above - I feel guilty and angry with myself, so I hurt myself in order to punish me and make me feel worse because I feel like I deserve it.
7. When and why did you start this behavior? I started self-harming in 2002, when I was 13. I started banging my head when I was 15 and I had no methods to cut myself. I started to have eating problems when I was 17, and they have got worse since I started uni.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies) It doesn't really. Emotional closure because it's something to focus on at the time, it stops me thinking about what is really bothering me. But in the end it doesn't help. Banging my head comforts me for a while because of the repetitive action and because it calms me down a bit.
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I can't say directly
I am asking for help
I am trying to express my pain
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1) Talk to someone
2) Go for a run or do something physical
3) Write everything down
4) Listen to happy music
Which of the following are true for you? Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either (I know it's not true, but it's what I convince myself sometimes)
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone (see above)
It just shows how bad a person I am
It keeps people away
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery? Somewhere between stages 3 and 4.
This was actually a really good distraction in itself, it made me think. Thanks for posting it. :)
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
- Cutting, burning, ODing, punching, head banging etc ED I suppose too
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
- Yes
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
- Because it's... stable. Because it's mine.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
- Isn't it part of the survival instinct or something. Pain gives you adrenalene so you can fight or flight?
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
- It doesn't
6. How does this behavior punish me?
- I don't know, when I want it to it just does?
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
- 17.5 and because I couldn't deal with my depression anymore
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
- Emotional closure within myself because in someways it's like "I've done what I needed to do, now I can move on". Affection and care not so much. Though I suppose some of the times I end up in hospital it's because I needed to escape reality so I guess I'm kind of relying on the hospital personnel to care for me in that regard?
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I am trying to express my pain
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to release emotional tension
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1.
2.
3.
I don't know, I have a whole heap of skill from DBT, but when I really need to they don't work
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
It keeps people away
FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery? (see hidden information for the stages and details of each)
Ummm 1, but more "my negative beliefs about THE WORLD are right"
"Watch me fault her "you're living like a disaster". She said "kill me faster", with strawberry gashes all over"
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
Cutting.
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
Relief.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
It doesn't.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
It just eases whatever feelings I have at the time.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
Yes.
6. How does this behavior punish me?
It makes me feel like I paid.
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
It just kind of happened during the summer before freshman year.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
I can secretly 'get even' for shitty things I've done, or avoid or deal with something that is bothering me without bothering anyone else.
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to express my rage at myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am asking for help (from the right person)
I want to be rescued (by the right person)
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to get "high"
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. smoke.
2. drink.
3. sex.
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
No one knows about it anyways
I need to be punished for what I did
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
cutting overdosing purging starving
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
they stop me well sometimes they stop me from going over the edge and relief
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
well i cant control most things so they help me control what i can..
sometimes i chose to its what i want its normal for me
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
it makes u feel better for awhile in away it helps me feel free and in control noone can tell me what to do or stop me
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
im not sure how to answer this one atm
6. How does this behavior punish me?
scars seriouse damage of certain actions shows me not to do certain things again
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
its been a few years now i dont knw for all the reason some are just oveyus because i needed to lose weight and some my mental health just went down heel and its not me so i dont know why all the time
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
i cant answer that atm
young girl its alright your tears will soon dry your soon be free to fly
she's falling from grace , she's all over the place..............
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
Cutting, bruising (does excessive drinking count?)
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
They let me have some form of control and express my emotions.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
I can do it when I want, how deep I want, if I even do it at all. I can hide it. It's mine.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
I have control for once. I don't have it usually over anything.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
I don't understand
6. How does this behavior punish me?
I think the wrong things all the time, do the wrong things, say wrong things. Doing what I do means I am punished for doing these things, I get pain for hurting others. It's fair.
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
Three years ago on/off. Parents divorce, bad break up with boyfriend of a year, feeling worthless.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
I don't understand this question...
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to show that I own my body
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Play my video games
2. Sleep
3. Text someone something funny
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
No one knows about it anyways
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
It keeps people away
FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery? (see hidden information for the stages and details of each)
Probably between Stage 1 and 2.
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
Cutting, bruising (does excessive drinking count?)
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
They let me have some form of control and express my emotions.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
I can do it when I want, how deep I want, if I even do it at all. I can hide it. It's mine.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
I have control for once. I don't have it usually over anything.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
I don't understand
6. How does this behavior punish me?
I think the wrong things all the time, do the wrong things, say wrong things. Doing what I do means I am punished for doing these things, I get pain for hurting others. It's fair.
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
Three years ago on/off. Parents divorce, bad break up with boyfriend of a year, feeling worthless.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
I don't understand this question...
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to show that I own my body
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Play my video games
2. Sleep
3. Text someone something funny
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
No one knows about it anyways
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
It keeps people away
FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery? (see hidden information for the stages and details of each)
Probably between Stage 1 and 2.
1. Cutting, scratching, picking scabs
2. Makes me happier, don't know why
3. I'm in control of the pain, not other people
4. Don't know
5. It doesn't
6. I deserve to suffer, and because of this I do
7. Five years ago, don't know exactly why
8. It doesn't
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to get "high"
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Talk to someone
2. Write something
3. Play my flute/clarinet
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic> Cutting, overdosing, food issues and others.
2. How do these behaviors help you survive? They make me feel in control and allow me to cope. It is an intense punishment for feelings of guilt that would be otherwise too intense. Strangely, it is a friend for me when I feel so isolated and alone and I kind of revel in the thrill and calm and pain.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control? Because it is something that only I can control and do to myself.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better? It is amazingly calming and releases all those emotions and thoughts that, for me, remain bottled up inside and are hidden from the world. It kind of keeps me surviving because I do not talk or express anything any other way.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge? I get revenge upon myself for being so hideous a person.
6. How does this behavior punish me? As written above.
7. When and why did you start this behavior? In year nine, so about four years ago. It happened because finally, things got too much and something rather detrimental occurred during the summer term of that year.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies) Because otherwise, it seems that no one looks after me or gives me a hug or physical contact. I guess, in a way, it mothers me and lets me express all my bottled up thoughts.
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I believe my body is a battleground
I want to cleanse myself
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am taking over where my abuser left off
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to get "high"
I am trying to manage my flashbacks/memories
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Write.
2. Physical exercise.
3. Sing/dance.
4. Call friends.
5. Support.
TALK.
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
No one knows about it anyways
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
It keeps people away
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
2. It's better I do these little at a time then me holding it all in and then Eventually killing myself.
3.I control my own pain. They can't force this on me.
4.I doesn't, I just love it.
5.It doesn't
6.So I can hurt for being so horrible.
7.Late Dec or Early Jan, because My friend did it and I wondered what it was like.
8.It makes me happy.
I want to show that I own my body
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I want to cleanse myself
I am trying to express my pain
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to get "high"
I am trying to manage my flashbacks/memories
I am trying to release emotional tension
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
1.Vent (which I do.)
2.Scream
3.Punch stuffed animals.
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself, my pain will be worse
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic> cutting, scratching, very occasional burning
2. How do these behaviors help you survive? they don't - i'm not suicidal
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control? i control every aspect of it. i have never had to go to hospital or get stitches for it, never even really worried that it might be necessary. i am in control of every single second of the act, and that is a good feeling for me
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better? i'm not even entirely convinced that it does release endorphins. i know the theory behind it, but the jury's out on whether it's true or not. it makes me feel better by letting me feel like i'm in control of something, and that i have something that's mine
5. How does this behavior give me revenge? it doesn't, usually. i try not to do it as a reaction to a person that has annoyed me for the express reason that even though they'd never know, i don't want to let anybody get to me that much. it's usually more of a reaction to my own moods and feelings than specific events
6. How does this behavior punish me? i don't really consider my self harm to be a form of self-punishment, as i said above, i like the control aspect of it, but i have occasionally done it in response to feeling, for example, stupid or ugly or whatever
7. When and why did you start this behavior? aged nearly 13. i had never heard of it when i started, just tried it once when i was upset/annoyed sort of to see what happened, to feel that power over myself and to see if i could go through with hurting myself. needless to say, i could...
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies) i think it helps me feel that i have control over my actions and my life, and that is a comfort in itself when i am feeling out of control. i tend to do it several days in a row, then not at all for a few weeks/months so when i feel i 'need' it, it doesn't always fulfill what i want it to, as evidenced by me doing it repeatedly for a few days
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do: I want to show (feel) that I own my body
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself (sometimes)
I want to distract myself (from other pain)
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give (to myself) that I can't say directly (at all)
I am trying to express my pain (feelings)
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive (sometimes)
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to focus attention on physical pain rather than other feelings
(reworded from "I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain")
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead. 1. Have a hot shower
2. Smoke a cigarette
3. See if my friends are available to do something distracting
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you) Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
If I don't hurt myself this way (i will feel worse or as bad for longer)
It just shows how bad a person I am
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
Cutting, scratching.
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
It's the ultimate problem solver.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
It's there when I need it, never runs out, and it's all mine.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
It's science.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
It doesn't.
6. How does this behavior punish me?
That's not why I do it.
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
Last year. I've wanted to for a while, just never had the guts to. THen I tried and fell in love.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
*see question 3*
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am trying to express my pain
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to get "high"
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Writing (which I do)
2. Music/singing/dancing/playing
3. Take a walk or a run.
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
Cutting, burning
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
They give me something to focus on
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
No one can stop me, or force me to do it, so it's all me
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
Just the body's natural response
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
They hurt me, I hurt me - in some twisted way, it makes sense in my mind
6. How does this behavior punish me?
It hurts, obviously, but it also leaves me with scars, and makes me feel guilty
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
Last year; I was naive, and I was angry, and I didn't know how to cope
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
I like taking care of the wounds, and also people get worried if I do hurt myself, so they start caring for me more
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I believe my body is a battleground
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to get "high"
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Write about it
2. Talk to someone
3. Think it through
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
And right now, I think I'm at stage four, action.
oh non-believer, please believe me.
is there honestly nothing in this world
that keeps you living & breathing?
you're a ghost in your own
goddamn city.
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
cutting, fasting, burning, scratching
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
they distract me from more extreme behaviours, they keep me going
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
because it is my body
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
through pain
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
on myself. even though people tell me i don't deserve it.
6. How does this behavior punish me?
i punish myself whenever i am mad at myself
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
about a year ago. it started without me really noticing....mostly just scratching to distract myself from bad situations...but i soon learned i could control this
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
it gets me through tough situations. but it provides just as much emotional pain.
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to show that I own my body
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I want to cleanse myself
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1.draw/colour pictures
2.watch movies
3.walk my dog
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic> Cutting and scratching
2. How do these behaviors help you survive? It's a release from overwhelming emotions
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control? I can decide where I do it and how deep
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better? It makes me feel more calm
5. How does this behavior give me revenge? Don't do it for revenge
6. How does this behavior punish me? The hurtful looks I get when people see it
7. When and why did you start this behavior? Honestly can't remember, about 14
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies) It doesn't
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I am trying to express my pain
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to get "high"
I am trying to manage my flashbacks/memories
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Talk to someone
2. Draw
3. Go for a walk
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic> Cutting, burning, starving, bingeing, purging
2. How do these behaviors help you survive? They keep the anxiety down and keep the bad memories away sometimes.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control? No one can make me stop and I say how/when I do it.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better? Because I'm finally doing something about what hurts me.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge? I can show on my body what I can't say out loud.
6. How does this behavior punish me? It damages me physically, emotionally, and socially.
7. When and why did you start this behavior? Four years ago for ED behaviors, three years ago for cutting/burning. I started because I was overwhelmed with stress so much that normal coping skills wouldn't work anymore.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies) I can take care of my wounds, and it's familiar.
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I have a message to give that I can't say directly
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I want to cleanse myself
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to manage my flashbacks/memories
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Writing about what I'm feeling
2. Something neutral, like watching TV
3. Talk to someone about what's bothering me
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
Last edited by PaleMoon : 26-03-2010 at 03:38 AM.
Reason: Typos
My name is Matt, and I am a boy. Feel free to PM me :)
I have learned that the world is not a safe place. Not at all. But there are so many people who love me and want to keep me safe. And that is enough.
1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
Skin Picking & cutting
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
These behavior helps me to stay postive side of things.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
Not trying to hurt myself because of that hurts me very deeply
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
With the pains and heal the wounds.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
Control of my angers toward them.
6. How does this behavior punish me?
Anger, being bad (which is not true), & hurts myself
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
Skin picking- aged 9 or 10 years old
Cutting- 25 years old (right now)
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
Most of my family, my two aunts and few cousins who cares and loves me very much til I got sad or hurts by others & Sexual Assaulted by my cousin. Everytime, I do love myself and I can take care of myself for cleaning up myself and sometimes they do mine not very often..
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to show that I own my body
I want to express my rage at myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I believe my body is a battleground
I want to cleanse myself
I am trying to express my pain
I am taking over where my abuser left off
I am retaliating against myself for telling secrets
I am doing what my abuser brainwashed me to do, if I told
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to manage my flashbacks/memories
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Play Pogo games
2. Walk with my dog/playing some sports
3. Talking to my family & relatives that cheers me up
4. reading a book
5. Watchin tv/movies
7. sleep
8. bubble bath
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either
It's my body, I can do what I want with it
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
No one knows about it anyways
It keeps people away
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment
FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery? (see hidden information for the stages and details of each)
. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
I cut and scratch.
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
It helps me to release emotion.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
No.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
After I cut I feel relaxed.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
It doesn't.
6. How does this behavior punish me?
It doesn't.
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
I started scratching a couple months ago, and it evolved into cutting.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
I feel like I am pouring out my emotions in my blood.
Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to distract myself from other pain
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I am trying to express my pain
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to prove that I am alive
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Talk to my best friend
2. Rock out
3. Do some kind of artwork
Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
No one knows about it anyways
FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery? (see hidden information for the stages and details of each)
I'm trying to decide weather to stop or not.
There is no magic cure, no permanent solution to make it all go away. There are only small steps forward, and easier day, an unexpected laugh, and a mirror that doesn't matter anymore.
