Woo-hoo... This is me... Drinking... Four shots down, more to do... Have a fifth of whisky and a bottle of liquor... Probably won't drink it all but it's there if I want it... Problem..? Want to cut REALLY bad... A tad suicidal to be honest
Helen, sweetie, we're worried... We love you hun. PLEASE take care sweetie.
*snuggles Callie, Carole, Emma, Alexx, Jeremy, and anyone else in need*
Take care all... I'm gonna finish this glass and grab another...
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
~ Marilyn Monroe
*hugs to helen* i really hope she is ok. I guess staying in the recovery position is the best thing. But yeah, anything that helps to throw things back is good enuf...the best thing is to force ur to throw up by sticking ur fingers down ur throat which activates the gag reflex and yeah throw things back up. xxx for helen...lemme know how she is tomorrow guys somehow..*curses the time differences*
Uni folks know I have a cat... Now I'll probably have to send him home to my mom
I just want to die...
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
~ Marilyn Monroe
No ones here
That's right
Everyones sleeping
I'm falling apart...
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
~ Marilyn Monroe
decent? how? for who? for what?
jeremy i know you can't be expected to answer these questions for my life so don't feel u need to. i just...it's just how i feel.
ally are you ok?
Even as the stone of the fruit must break
that its heart may stand in the sun,
so must you know pain.
There are only two ways in which one can live their life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is.
*hugs Ally* How are you doing today hun? I hope you managed to stay safe. Could you have a word with the uni folks and ask them if you can keep the cat?
Sorry about your exam Chloe, you never know though it may not have gone as badly as you think! How are you now?
*hugs for Carole, Callie, Jeremy and anyone who needs them*
*sends special hugs for Alexx* Are you alright hun? Did you sleep well?
---------------------
Have text Helen this morning but no reply yet. Will have to wait before I call her though cos of family. Will keep you all updated x
i hope helen is ok.
atm i feel as though everything is pointless. i want to cut, i want to do it on my arm cos nothing else works but i hate the scars on my arm and i cant add more cos ppl will see and...yeah...i cant.
but i dont know how long i can stop myself
Even as the stone of the fruit must break
that its heart may stand in the sun,
so must you know pain.
There are only two ways in which one can live their life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is.
I know that feeling all too well hun *hugs* try and resist though. I messed up and now have just *one* new scar on my arm but it is huge and would give away the fact I have been SIing again if I don't keep it covered. I really regret that cut. Please try and stay safe. Things are not pointless although they may seem like it at the moment xx
Helen's counsellor just called me back from last night. She said she doesn't have Helen's address with her but she is going to contact her line manager to see what they can do and whether they can get it. She said it is difficult cos Helen is over 18 so they can't tell her family but she will at least try.
*crawls out of her corner yawning*
oh noes
I should just crawl back in again....
mum and dad want to move house AGAIN (we've only been in this house for just over a year, the house before that-7 months and the house before that was my home and we were there for about 9 years)
I dont want to move....I dont feel settled as it is....moving again would..just push me over the edge
I know it sounds stupid....but...I like it here....sure..the neighbours are awful...but im close to things that keep me going...like my best mate...
and now they are talking about moving away to somewhere like Bredbury (which is the CLOSEST location theyve picked) which means id have to get two buses just to visit my best mate....the furthest place they've picked is near the trafford centre THATS LIKE....MILES AWAY!!!!
Its an HOUR on the bus...and that would be just to get to college....plus...the buses arent even that frequent anyway....
I asked her why she wanted to move again....
she said she wanted to "find a nicer area"
I dont see the point...
the whole world is full of ****...
i dont want to do this..
I dont want to do anything...
which explains why im still in bed
*cries*
*hugs you Alexx* Moving sucks, I'm sorry hun. Can you try to persuade them not to move? Will you be going to uni this year?
*hugs you Chloe* I'm sorry, I have no words hun
Just spoken to Helen and she sounds rough and is throwing up but yeah, she's concious and talking so thats something, going to call her back in 5 min x
