I want to crawl into a fort and just hide away. I'm far too overwhelmed to deal with the real world right now. I want hot cocoa with lots of marshmallows and my little stuffed doggie Stitcher and my favorite blanket. Being a parent is too tough right now.
Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."
*hides in the corner of the room and stares at the wall*
~Matt~
Susanna Kaysen: I'm ambivalent. In fact that's my new favorite word.
Dr. Sonia Wick: Do you know what that means, ambivalence?
Susanna Kaysen: I don't care.
Dr. Sonia Wick: If it's your favorite word, I would've thought you would...
Susanna Kaysen: It *means* I don't care. That's what it means.
*sneaks in and curls up in a corner* hey guys, for those of you that don't know me, I'm Charlie. I used to spend a lot of time in here a few years back but I can see most of my old wardies aren't around so much anymore...
WARNING!PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS USER MAY CAUSE MIND NUMBNESS, COMPLETE STUPIDITY, AND IN SEVERE CASES MAY CAUSE THE EXPOSEE'S BRAIN TO EXPLODE!
(This user will not be held responsible for adverse affects, terms and conditions apply, see his inbox for details)
Cass Cass and Tiff Tiff are my special girlies <3
This afternon has just gone downhill very fast... and I am scared for tonight
~Matt~
Susanna Kaysen: I'm ambivalent. In fact that's my new favorite word.
Dr. Sonia Wick: Do you know what that means, ambivalence?
Susanna Kaysen: I don't care.
Dr. Sonia Wick: If it's your favorite word, I would've thought you would...
Susanna Kaysen: It *means* I don't care. That's what it means.
Urmm..no hugs yet please :) *shakes hand* sorry you seem to be having a hard time. I hope things pick up for you both.
*curls up in a corner with teddies*
WARNING!PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS USER MAY CAUSE MIND NUMBNESS, COMPLETE STUPIDITY, AND IN SEVERE CASES MAY CAUSE THE EXPOSEE'S BRAIN TO EXPLODE!
(This user will not be held responsible for adverse affects, terms and conditions apply, see his inbox for details)
Cass Cass and Tiff Tiff are my special girlies <3
I am not really a veteran. Been on here a year. But I need somewhere safe. I can't be brave anymore. My parents make me feel trapped and hopeless. Need hugs.
*crawls in quietly and hides under blanket* I am just going to hide here until my depression magically disappears and I can be somewhat okay again. I highly doubt that will happen considering this time my depression has been getting quite bad and I am on my sixth month of misery. I am going crazy I mean my depression never goes away completely (and while hard I have managed to deal with it for the last 12 years) but this time it is at it's absolute worse and I am hopelessly stuck in it and there isn't any way out.
“I like the stars. It's the illusion of permanence, I think. I mean, they're always flaring up and caving in and going out. But from here, I can pretend...I can pretend that things last. I can pretend that lives last longer than moments. Gods come, and gods go. Mortals flicker and flash and fade. Worlds don't last; and stars and galaxies are transient, fleeting things that twinkle like fireflies and vanish into cold and dust. But I can pretend...”
― Neil Gaiman
I'm back again after yet another hospital trip and all I want to do is curl up in a corner and cry. After an event in hospital I've started having flashbacks from before my first ever ECT sessions. Losing those memories is part of the reason I'm still alive. Right now I don't know if I can cope with this or even if this is just the world telling me my time has come. It's getting harder each day to get through and I'm not sure whether it's worth fighting or even possible. For now I'm just going to hide in a corner with my pillow, blankets and bears....
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
*curls up in a corner crying and cuddling my bear*
My GP accidentally triggerred me into a severely suicidal situation where I've been planning out my next suicide attempt and ensuring that my husband will not be the person to find me, that noone will find me until it's way to late for me to be recovered and that the plan will work perfectly. Am I doing the wrong thing? Does it even matter? What am I supposed to do to stop the flashbacks, the overwhelming depression and the almost constant and frequent triggering..... Especially when I'm not able to take medications to help me cope... Maybe I just need to accept that my time is coming and I need to b e prepared for it when it does. Or I can just keep hiding in a pillow fort for the remainder of my life....
*sigh*
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
I'm so over having kids right now. I can't handle all the meltdowns. I just want to craw into my son's fort and never come out. Just let me curl up with a blanket and pillow and I'll be alright. Maybe.
Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."
It's time to listen to the song lyrics and just "let it go".....
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
I guess I will stay here for a lil while... very suicidal and trying to stay safe but its mot working very well :(
~Matt~
Susanna Kaysen: I'm ambivalent. In fact that's my new favorite word.
Dr. Sonia Wick: Do you know what that means, ambivalence?
Susanna Kaysen: I don't care.
Dr. Sonia Wick: If it's your favorite word, I would've thought you would...
Susanna Kaysen: It *means* I don't care. That's what it means.
-Finds her little curling up space and her teddybear- don't wanna....
Hello everyone name is Becca age 34, everyone who is a resident of my head may or may not show. I know Sammie will if there is someone around her age. Ace would be most likely to show up out of all of them.
The residence of my head
Sammie: Age 6, sweet, shy, playful, doesn't like grown men
Leigh: Age 16, sort of a loner, creative, friendly, protective of Sammie
Ace: Age 29, sensitive, creative, a good guy tries to convince Sammie each day that he is.
Can I disappear from this world for a while? I can't handle daily life and right at the moment I can barely manage to stay alive for a day. My brain, the flashbacks and the hallucinations are encouraging me to just give up and give in but I don't want to hurt those that I love.
So torn right now so I'm going to hide away from the world in a pillow fort with my teddy bear.....
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
