support for katie - when.will.it.end

[when.will.it.end]

Thanks. I can't help thinking that things would be better if I was dead. I have plans floating around my head. Everyone would better off without me wouldn't they?

[Wonderland.]

People would be deeply upset if you were to kill yourself. I'm sure you have plenty of people in your life who care about you, as well as people on here.

Given that you have plans forming in your head it would be advisable to either go back to the ward now or to ring them up and speak to them.

[when.will.it.end]

I'm going back to the ward.

[Fran86]

Try not to be too hard on yourself, Katie. It sounds like you are going through a lot of personal changes, that's bound to be upsetting and triggering. Remember that it's one step at the time. Everytime you have SH thoughts and manage not to give in that you getting that little bit better and stronger. There's no way it can happen overnight and with things changing it would be very easy to slip into old habits. Remember, that the mental health staff are there to help. Going and telling them you're feeling triggered won't get you sectioned. But leaving the ward and SH at home might. Big hugs and take care xxx

[when.will.it.end]

Thank you.

Last night was awful. Dissociated and passing out. An ambulance brought me back to the ward. Heading over to Brigid (supported living place) so do some paper work. Feeling slightly more human today. Getting discharged tomorrow and I'm terrified.

[Wonderland.]

Sorry to hear that you had such an awful night. But I'm glad you are feeling more human today.

Coming out of hospital can be a big thing for some people. Hopefully given that you have been getting out a bit it won't be such a huge this.

With moving that is a massive change and something that will take time to get used to. Try and be gentle with yourself.

[when.will.it.end]

Thanks. X

I survived the day just got to get through the night. Feel very triggered because it's my last ever night here and I won't ever be coming back. Or so the plan goes. I'm moving to Brigid tomorrow. Fuuuuccckkk.

[Fran86]

I hope that the supported living is a positive step and helps you on the road to recovery. x

[Wonderland.]

It is such a big change in your life Katie, do not underestimate that. Hopefully once you have been at the new place after a couple of weeks you will start to settle in. Allow yourself time to settle and be gentle with yourself in the mean time.

I've moved many times, and it always helped me to put up pictures of loved ones and have things that mean a lot to you close by. I have no doubt that you will be able to make it more homely.

[when.will.it.end]

Thanks. It's discharge day today! And I've got therapy in a bit. Eeek wish me luck!

[Wonderland.]

How are you feeling about being discharged? I hope therapy goes well.

[when.will.it.end]

Scared shitless! This may well be my last ever admission! Like ever! I've been in and out for three years and the thought I may never come back is terrifying.

[Wonderland.]

Moving is a stressful process. Can you try and see the possibility of not going into hospital again as a positive things.

It's a big change when you have been in and out of hospital for so long. Could you try and view this a step forward, a good medium between home and hospital?

[when.will.it.end]

It's definitely a positive thing just completely overwhelming at the same time. I hope I'm never in hospital again. It would be amazing to stay out. Don't know how realistic it is but it's a good aim I suppose. Just on my way to therapy now.

[when.will.it.end]

Therapy was really triggering, want to go back to London. It's my home.

[Wonderland.]

London isn't your home lovely. Please stay where you are, and please stay safe. Going to london is a bad idea.

Would you like to talk about therapy?

Are you at the supported living now?

[when.will.it.end]

<3

Therapy was just an update of the last couple of weeks because I hadn't seen her in a while. Which was overwhelming because a lot has happened in the last two weeks. We talked about London a lot which set it all off in my head. Also I'm technically between homes so not very settled yet. I've just left the ward with my mum. Going to my flat to pick up the rest of my stuff and then going to Brigid.

[Wonderland.]

Therapy can be rather overwhelming, especially given the past few weeks you have had to deal with.

Do you think you are going to be able to stay safe?

It is bound to be rather unsettling right now for you. Once you get all your stuff moved into Brigid. Once you have sorted it all out and unpacked, you can make it homely in there.

[when.will.it.end]

Not sure about staying safe, we'll see.

At Brigid now mum has gone home. Feeling much better with a my stuff in, bed is sorted out, pictures are up and watching friends. Can't really believe I'm actually here. It's the beginning of everything. Much better than being here and living out of a suitcase.

[Wonderland.]

I hope you are able to stay safe.

Glad you are feeling much better with all your stuff moved in.

Are you able to keep yourself fully occupied tonight?