Yeah you can call me Hollz,today is not going well as I've ben gambling what I can't afford, and I am losing, losing and losing and I am goin to end up with nothing, I wish I had stayed in bed, had I done so I wouldn't of been so damn impulsive you know and wouldn't be in this position, it is as if I enjoy ptting myself in this position, you know, honestly, I don't know what I am all about, I really, really don't.
First and foremost, people will always want what is best r your children, and thats going to be with you, staying with you. If you haven't been to the doctor teyet, they will be able to offer you additional support and maybe medication that will help you to control your moods.
They will ask you how you are feeling and stuff, maybe get you to fill out a questionnaire to assess your feelings, but don't be worried about being oen and honest with your gp, they are there to help.
AND I hope your ribs feel better soon x
Something has changed within me, something is not the same, I'm through with playing by the rules of someone elses game. Too late for second guessing, too late to go back to sleep, its time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap....
Somethings I cannot change, but till I try I'll never know...
***
Big hugs to all my friends on here, thanks for your constant support - love you guys
I've really really royally fukked up, I can't deal with it. I'm sorry everyone, I have let everyone down. I just can't fukkin do this.
Something has changed within me, something is not the same, I'm through with playing by the rules of someone elses game. Too late for second guessing, too late to go back to sleep, its time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap....
Somethings I cannot change, but till I try I'll never know...
***
Big hugs to all my friends on here, thanks for your constant support - love you guys
I woke up this morning, I had enough money to get me buy. Now I don't even have £2 to get a bloody train ticket. I hae nothing left to offer, I've ****ed up and I can't think of any way out of this now. I wish I had never got up this morning, I wish I wasn't impulsive and I wish I knew what to do.
I'm sure the self destructrive behaviour will continue, but it wont be gambling related, as I have no money. I'm now just sitting at home, crying coz there is no way out for me now, no way out.
Something has changed within me, something is not the same, I'm through with playing by the rules of someone elses game. Too late for second guessing, too late to go back to sleep, its time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap....
Somethings I cannot change, but till I try I'll never know...
***
Big hugs to all my friends on here, thanks for your constant support - love you guys
Am so sorry Hollz. Is there anyway you can borrow a bit of money just to see you through this rough patch?
Please go easy on yourself hun and take care xx
Something has changed within me, something is not the same, I'm through with playing by the rules of someone elses game. Too late for second guessing, too late to go back to sleep, its time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap....
Somethings I cannot change, but till I try I'll never know...
***
Big hugs to all my friends on here, thanks for your constant support - love you guys
not got dressed, or washed, not done my hair and banned my kids from having friends around.
been binge eating and feeling rock bottom. need to harm myself before the doctors appointment
tomorrow as a punishment for what is likely to happen
Hollz I am so sorry you are in this position today. can anyone lend you something for food or your basics until you get money?
I know what you mean about the behaviour Im the same only mines Bulimia. Every day I wake up determined and every night I go to bed knwing Ive failed. Please take care of yourself Hollz and please pm me if you want to chat.
Thank you also for your advice, its made me determined to go to the GP.Ive got to sort myself out somehow.
Thanks also for saying about my ribsxx
Differences...are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open. GOF
Albus Dumbledore
Youngatheart, I have BPD and also have children and have never had any problem with the services,
theyve all been very helpful. I think it would be a good idea to see a gp and get some support xx
Grace, thank you so much. i think I worry as 2 of mt children have special needs. thank you. I will make an appointment. Its just hard to know what to say when I go in, where to start! hugs Sam
Differences...are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open. GOF
Albus Dumbledore
Hi. Sorry I haven't been around for a while. I'm breaking apart.
Sounds like everyone's had a really rough time over the past couple of days. I hope you find the strength to get through it. Use whatever support is available to you. *Hugs to all*
Mari, please don't isolate us - we care and sorry i missed you on msn
Sorry everyone, I've been stupid, but I'm going to go to the hosp
(((hugs))) to you all and speak to you when I can xxx
Something has changed within me, something is not the same, I'm through with playing by the rules of someone elses game. Too late for second guessing, too late to go back to sleep, its time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap....
Somethings I cannot change, but till I try I'll never know...
***
Big hugs to all my friends on here, thanks for your constant support - love you guys
Mari, I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling so bad. I guess you probably won't see this message as you have gone offline but please try and keep yourself safe, and keep talking to us. Sending you lots of hugs.
Hollz, I'm really proud of you for going to hospital, that really is fantastic - obviously I wish you didn't need too but it's good you're taking the responsibility to go now. Hope they help you chicka. xx
