i cant believe i let you make me feel like this. im so angry with myself and you for everything at the moment. i cant believe you led me on, kept on and didnt even tell me. do you not think i felt bad enough already...youve already messed with my head from the start and youre ripping me apart bit by painful bit. but the thing is (that you dont know, or pretend not to know) i love you. and i hate myself for loving you. i wish with all my heart id never fell for you, and i know we agreed from the start nothing could happen but you knew i was only 17(18) did you really think i could deal with that?... you dont know how much ive cried over you and then been so angry after for letting you get to me...i hated not getting my kiss and cuddle goodnight, it ripped my heart right out, but i had to do it, i couldnt face you after i saw your txt. i hate you, but i love you and i hate that! i wish i could get rid of this pain but it wont go away...i wish you were here right now, i wish it was monday...but i know i have a really big decision to make over the weekend...i can either keep it going knowing about it....or let you go and stop...i dont know if i can....its such a hard decision....i wish i knew what to do. if i decide to stop...its going to hurt like hell...i dont know what to do...i just have to be strong....but thats just not me....
ps. im sorry im not what you wanted and im sorry iv been so moody, but can you blame me...i know you noticed i saw thats why you never said nothing...i just hope youre happy what you have done to me and made me feel...i hate you....
...but i love you...i wish i could tell you everything...im sorry that im sorry......
People Who Laugh A Lot, Cry A Lot, Because It Only Takes One Smile To Hide A Million Tears...
Some days she feels like dying, she gets so sick of crying.
“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.”
Sam - you are in now way invisible OR unloved. *cuddles*
In fact NO ONE on RYL is.
Gee - I hate you sometimes I really do. Yet I still get really annoyed when you ignore me. I hate that you constantly roll up your sleeves and bare your scratches at me. I don't wanna see them. To be honest I don't care. I've got my own problems. If I wanted yours I'd ask ok? Everyone says it, you want to BE me. If I'm anything like how you behave then I need to change. A lot.
S & R - You are the two people I really worry about. Because you pretend to be fine and get on with it. But I can't avoid what I see. I love you both more than you know. You're like my little sisters. I'd do anything to protect you. I don't wanna see you both where I am now in 2 years. And R you're like mini-me so much it's scary sometimes, please hang on to being a kid for a little bit longer baby.
I want to **** you 'till it hurts, you sexy son of a bitch. I'm so very glad you're mine and I can do with you what I want.
"...that incremental suicide of turning your life into a dream, to make being awake as similar to sleep as possible. Drowsily, lazily, dry-mouth your way through the day's ceremonies, fumble your way back into the dew-bather you never really left, draped in brown, brown now all around, the haze!" - Russell Brand on drug addiction.
"Si ma êkh gûndo piyiamásko...ándo bírto barruno. Bírto, bírto barruno."
You've pissed me off today. I really wanted to spend it with you but you've decided to **** off with your mates. When you need me I drrop evrerything to help you. Your such a selfish prick sometimes. Despite this I love you, please just come home at a reasonable time, in a reasonable mood so at least this evening can be nice. I'll leave it if you do.
Play the game out
Amor Vincit Omnia
Dad 10/11/2008 Always our sunshine, I'm still playing for the town hall clock
I want you to go to the hospital.
And at the same time I don't.. I want you to be safe but I want to be near you. It's bugging me already that you'll be at least a week away from the dorm and I can't see you.
It's kinda tiring to be worried all the time.. But I can't stop it, I love you too much.
Just take care of yourself, okay? Don't try to make it all by yourself for too long. Promise me..
I love you so much.
I cry myself to sleep missing you.
I feel sick whenever your name comes up.
And when they mention her I just want to die.
When I say I wish someone would love me, it's not someone.
It's you.
i want the world to just slow down for a little bit, just so i can get everything sorted and then carry on. it would help. i know it's not possible. or i would settle for a boyfriend.
Don't do this to me please.
I'm never gunna accept you've gone.
I love you.
I hate her so much.
She isn't any more ****ing perfect than me.
She lets you walk all over her.
At least I wasn't a door mat.
I just wanna be back in your arms.
I can't believe it's been 10 months.
