i dout it my psych watches spongebob with me
and takes me to cateries cos she knows i like cats
use me abuse me
i deserve it
i am whatever you want me to be
i miss his
i was his special girl
he helped me be good
i need him
i want him
i miss him
i miss him so much
hemade me a good girl
and now im just a dirty little slut
who deserve so much pain
so somuch pain
i need the pain
why wont he take me back
i need him
i need him
you are not a dirty little slut i promise promise promise you
nothing that happened to you was your fault
and you dont need ANYBODY
nobody at all
because all you need is YOU
i wish i could take you to a cattery
(although i'd end up crying and demanding to take them all home with me)
lets loads of cats into the safe room
*dont worry, people with allergies or phobias! these cats dont give people allergic reactions and theyre only in one corner. they are special cats who have promised not to leave this area in case they upset somebody*
there you go :) lots and lots of kitties and you can cuddle them as much as you want
he probably isnt happy hunny he doesnt sound like hes happy he sounds like hes ****ed up
if he gets help one day, and gets better, then good for him, i suppose. but nothing will ever make it okay what he did to you. his problems will never be your fault. and i dont think someone who does that can ever be happy, because if they regret it then that regret will haunt them and if they dont then they are insane, evil people
he has a new gf and hes happy with her.
i just cant cope
i need to cut
i need to the pain
nothings working
nothing causes me enough pain
i need more pain
nothing is workin cos pain isnt good honey
your body knows pain isnt the way to make things better
he isnt happy nobody could be happy if theyre that ****ed up
i gotta reward system instead of pain
like, alcohol and food, which both arent good i know
but it feels more positive that punishing
if i do good and try to eat properly and nothing bad happens, i get some wine or some whisky
its like, positive reinforcement. we did it in psychology
i fell asleep around 4am
STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID
i woke up crying about 4 times because he was on me
im not crazy he WAS on me
i saw him i felt him
he was on me
he wouldnt get off
i couldnt get him off me
i had to go to the bathroom and wash
because i was so dirty
i still am dirty
why wouldnt he get off me???
i had to lay there
and had to wait for him to finish
it took so long for him to finish
i cant cope with his
i could feel him inside me
i cant deal with this anymore
i just cant!!!!!
you are not dirty, you are NOT dirty, alright? you are brave and special and what happened was something that was done to you, and was nothing to do with who you are. something wrong and cruel happened to you but it doesn't change you - it doesnt make you better or worse, it doesnt even make you different if you dont let it. it's just an action, and you are a person, you will last longer, you are stronger, it's nothing
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
of course youre allowed in the safe room! youre a brilliant amazing girl :)
it's just, there are cats in the safe room remember, and lots of other animals, but theyre not allowed out of the safe room so theyre all alone :(
it's up to you sweetheart :)
i just dont want you to think you're not allowed in there
the safe room was CREATED for scared sad people, as a place where they didnt have to be afraid any more. if you, a scared sad person, wasnt allowed in there, then what would the world be coming to?
