^ I agree with the adult labels part. But if 'younger members' do check those threads out and are repulsed, they probably won't do it again. And really, if you're warned, you're warned. Sex is everywhere, at least here it generally comes with a label.
I don't think an changes should be made, just because there are alot of young members doesn't mean you should forget that there are older members too. If the website became too strict or childish I think alot of the older members would leave.
this is the first day of my life
I’m glad I didn’t die before I met you
But now I don’t care I could go anywhere with you
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i dont think anything needs changeing. the problem today's society has atm is they are willing to belive we are all niave and have no idea about sex and things like that. the problem is that jsut because we arnt adults, doesnt mean sex issues dont concern or involve those who are under 18. RYL is great that younger people can get advice and sex and other 'adult' topics where they wouldnt have done otherwise.
hope that made sense >.<
"I would be almighty in my own world of art, even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell." -Picasso
"No, painting is not done to decorate apartments. It is an instrument of war." - Picasso
'I have scars becuase I have a past; but they, like my past, do not define my future'
even thought im an old person (at the ripe old age of 19)...
surely the topics of sex and sexuality are still topics that people under 18 will have problems with and need to talk about... lets face it, its a pretty big part of growing up for a lot of people, its better to have a little bit of it around rather than wrapping us all up in cotton wool.
as long as its doesnt turn into needless hijacking as mentioned, or any form of sexism or it used as insults then why not... ive been on forums that are much worse!
could any system such as a labeling method that automatically disappears for guests and under-a-certain-age members be implemented?
ages would be sought during registration, and only members over 15,16,18(?) would have access rights to the content, maybe the whole thread would be invisible.
mand x
Mand, South Wales, Full-time working, single mother to 2 scarily independent girls.
I AM A PROUD PLUMERIA SISTER
RYL is all about free speech and beliefs, so I think it would be terrible if it would all strict and no no mac you can't look at Harley's Dad's saturday night story thread because it might have adult matters in it kind of bull_ _ _ _.
RYL v3 is a lot less constricting and is more allowing about subjects such as religion and politics, as long as the talk stays nuetral does'nt push political views onto other people and doesnt decend into flaming of politicians or anything like that then it is ok.
Typsee wasnt saying that all mature content should be stopped, its not about Tonys awesome Saturday night stories, its about threads like the Naturist Room and whether its appropriate and how the younger members feel about it RYL as it is since the youngest member is 11 years old.
Aimee (Craola) Brings up a good point, the mature content in question is not the clearly labeled and marked adult content that we see in some of the jokes and Tony's stories and such. It is the things that are less obviously adult, but still mature for some of the younger set, like as Aimee said, the Naturist Room and other things on that level.
AD
Well it breaks my heart to see you this way,
The beauty in life, where's it gone?
And somebody told me you were doing okay,
Somehow I guess they were wrong.
RYL is by no mean too leniant. Like at all. I agree with Sarah (Something Vague) that it's the strictest forum I've been on.
Another forum I go to has a whole board devoted to Sexuality and relationships where we discuss all things sexual and whatever. It's no big deal. There are members there as young as 12/13 I'm sure but how many 13 year olds don't know about sex or homosexuality?
I also don't consider homosexuality an adult topic, heterosexuality isn't.
You can't avoid it, so don't try to. If people think RYL isn't strict enough I think they've got their head screwed on backwards, honestly.
Hijacking of threads pisses me off more than anything, a few posts is grand but when it's upto 1 or 2 extra pages it's a bit ridiculous. It's especially annoying because there are more than enough spamming threads for people to spam their heart out on.
There's nothing wrong with the adult content on this site. There's not really much you can do about it anyway, from the point of a 12 year old or the point of someone who has been sexually abused. Sex is everywhere these days, it's unavoidable. If you don't want to hear about sexual things then don't go into threads with an adult label. If threads have been hijacked and there's than a few pages of spamming (Because a few posts isn't really a problem) then either leave the thread, report it, or bring the thread back on topic. I dunno.
People need to stop being so hypersensitive and al "OMG SEX! NO! WE CAN'T LET THE KIDDIES SEEEEEE!!!!" they're going to see anyway and if they don't already know then they've led quite a sheltered life.
Aimee (Craola) Brings up a good point, the mature content in question is not the clearly labeled and marked adult content that we see in some of the jokes and Tony's stories and such. It is the things that are less obviously adult, but still mature for some of the younger set, like as Aimee said, the Naturist Room and other things on that level.
AD
I don't like the naturists room, I mean come on, how many spamming threads does the one board need? :/
But it's not adult. It's not "The Naturists and Lick Eachother All Over Room"
Actual naturists are not doing it to be more sexual and make their life like a porno, they feel more comfortable in the buff. Its our natural state and they don't want to cover it up. There's nothing remotely inappropriate about that.
Fi thats the reason I dont like it, I personally think we have too many spamming rooms, there are four (I think) now in General and I really dont see why that many are needed.
Again I dont think its about being hypersensitive, sex is a part of life and there would be no way of stopping talk about it even if you wanted to. This discussion isnt about that, but im rubbish with words so im not going to attempt to say anything.
i think sexual issues are a big part of a teenagers life, and can cause a lot of upset and heartbreak, as there is a lot of teenagers on here (sorry for generalizing) i think it wouldn't be beneficial to ban talking about sex. it can be healthy to express yourself!
also, i think ryl is a very tame website, and the small amount of threads including sexual topics are most of the time labelled adult.
I think discussion of sexuality is normal and natural and it should be welcomed at RYL, but at the same time it gets annoying when it is used to spam, if that makes sense. I view this site as just a big group of friends (forgive me if that sounds naive) and so I think adult topics should be allowed, but with a bit of discretion.
So the only problem I have with it is the spamming aspect of it. Here and there, it is fine when it pops up but I think there has been an overabundance of it lately.
I dont know if measures could be taken to lessen that though because it would have to include spamming in general and spam cant be eradicated completely, it would make things a bit boring :P.
I hope I made sense, but on two hours sleep, Im sure I didnt haha.
spam threads should be moved to f&d lol...on other forums the f&d board is called 'Games room/Spam' or 'Spam and Fun', or 'Everything else (including spam)'.
mand x
Mand, South Wales, Full-time working, single mother to 2 scarily independent girls.
I AM A PROUD PLUMERIA SISTER
Firstly the idea of RYL being mature or full of free speach made me scare my cat spitting out my food because I was laughing so hard. I know I'll now be asked by mods (quite rightly) to explain what I think would be better. Maturity, isn't going to be sorted by the mods, there's not much you can do about it, you can't just say 'oi you immature brat, get lost,' especially considering this is a self harm support site. Free speach, well, actually I lie, if you're clever, with the amount of moderation at the moment you could probably get away with it, but I mean, I helped write the bloody rules and I reread any joke I make about 50 times to make sure I don't get points for it. There's a very thin line. I don't know what we can do about it, considering the point of this site is for si support, but for instance, there are many tabboos on RYL. Not just stuff like 'how do I kill myself/cut deeper, whatever, (which should be a tabboo), but now, when someone's being really annoying, really shitty to people etc, they are protected by the mods, rather than the people who are suffering. I don't know, I'm rambling now and I'll probably regret this.
Anyway. Sexual Stuff. *adult*
I come from a very different point of view in that I have suffered some kind of sexual abuse and I also have sexual ocd. I don't think it's so much as censoring it more. However, the fact is in any psychiatric environment people are going to be exposed to some form of sex. Living partially on a psych ward for two years, even there, in an adolescent unit with people as young as 12 we've had what, people running around screaming they're going to be sexually attacked by staff/patients, patients wanking off in public, very graphic discussions of sexual abuse between patients. I mean, the reason I'm saying this, is that any supposed safe place is going to be affected by sexual behaviour/thoughts.
The fact is, with what people have said no young person is going to have the guts to say a ****ing thing against the sexuality on the boards, I don't say that to criticise, I say it as fact. If I was young I wouldn't. I'm 17, I'm trying to give another perspective. I'll probabyl get slaughtered by some people, I don't care. If you can't cope with another point of view that's your problem.
A friend of mine who had been sexually abused complained about a thread in F&D having 'penis' in the title. That was very triggering to her. Nothing happened, because it would have been over-censoring. So, I guess the point of a thread like this would be to open it up. A 12 year old sees athread that is about penis amusement. What is a 12 year old goign to think? What is an older suffered of sexual abuse going to be triggered by? In the A&B forum it would be altered I'm sure, but not in F&D, a supposed trigger free place.
As part of my OCD I have pretty much a phobia of sex. But I am happy to enter mature discussion about sexual abuse, etc. Well, not happy, but able to. However, as whatshisface said, erm thingy, erm Blates, Bones, Blithe or something like that, well everything he said was spot on. It is just a few people turning every thing into a silly 'OMG SEX' sort of thing. And to some extent, it's a teenage site, you're going to get that.
Do I think RYL is over Censored. No, you couldn't censor it anymore if you tried. Do I think the sexual discussion is mature? Very rarely, the genital cutting thread was looking ok last time I looked at it, and the A&B stuff is looked after really well, but general threads in GSA or in General, well it's just playground stuff really.
I think you have to look at several audiences you have, if you had a 12 year old in chat, would you talk about sex the way people do in things like the 'naturists room'? If you had someone's Mum in chat, would you? I mean, RYL might be getting recommended in newspapers, but people on my psych ward have told me to stay well away. If you had someone in chat who had been sexually abused in chat would you watch what yo usay around them?
I mean, another thing I want to mention is that, survivors of sexual abuse aren't going to shrivel up and die at the mention of sex, I know some who are fine to engage in the sort of chat being discussed now, I know some who would have serious difficulties with it.
I think to be honest, sexual innuendo is the last thing to worry about now, with RYL as it is, we should be more worried about the lack of mods, the general free speach, and erm, all the other problems we whinge about in chat than the sexual content.
I'm really sorry if I've upset anyone with my previous reply. On the whole RYL does still rock, and I know all the staff are working really hard at the moment. It's easy to criticise from the sidelines I know, sorry. Bad evening.
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