i put case by case basis, because there are some people who like to meet up with parents and their children, who are not parents themselves, so they wouldn't really be allowed to go to a parent's/maternity meeting.
Mand, South Wales, Full-time working, single mother to 2 scarily independent girls.
I AM A PROUD PLUMERIA SISTER
why wouldnt they be allowed?If its a maternity meet you can still go if you dont have a child....you would just know it was a child based meet.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
how old do you have to be to go to a meet? like 15?
if people are allowed to bring their kids to meets then the members who are like 13/14 might feel a bit put out that they're not allowed to attend but someone is allowed to bring their 7 year old or whatever.
it's probably best that no kids are allowed at general meets.
especially london.
I roll over and hold on tightly, and whisper "If they want you, they're gonna have to fight me,"
I don't want to go to a regular meet with people bringing their kids along. And even if I was asked if I minded, I'm the type of person who would feel like they'd have to say it was ok just because everyone else said it was fine and I didn't want to be the one person who was going to say no.
Also on another note...should it not be maternity/paternity meets?? Are male members with children excluded from these meets?
Me for one is not fussed if i child turns up and we all said once we didn't mind a child at the meet I think if the majority say they don't mind AND the person bringing the kid desperately can't get a babysitter I think they should be allowed to bring the kidliwink along if arranged before hand and prefably for the kid to be under 10
But then if there's say, 10 people going to a meet, and 1 person doesn't like it, they might not want to speak up because no one else cares, really.
And why under ten? There is the whole under fifteen rule for kids at meets.
But yeah, I vote just at maternity meets.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
i had assumed maternity meets would be for pregnant women/partners and parents of younger children only.
Erm, what?
That's like saying London meets are for people who only live in London! How ridiculous.
If i want to go to a maternity meet, i have that right regardless of whether i had a child/or was pregnant, because i want to see my friends - friends who have children/babies aren't allowed to go to "normal" meets (unless childless), so it would be a good opportunity for others to meet up with them. It isn't a meet just for the babies you know, it's a meet for the adults aswell.
That's quite ridiculous, and i feel rather offended by that actually. It sounds so cliquey and unwelcoming. RYL isn't about that.
i wasnt saying you werent allowed, just what the assumption had been, based on the usual attendees being mothers/to be, their partners and their babies.
no-one else has attended before. or expressed an interest in attending either.
Mand, South Wales, Full-time working, single mother to 2 scarily independent girls.
I AM A PROUD PLUMERIA SISTER
Well you assumed wrong. Anyone is entitled to go to a maternity meet, whether they have children or not.
The basis of a maternity meet is for people who are parents to meet up, but it isn't just exclusive to parents. And to my knowledge there's only ever been one, possibly two, maternity meets, so not everyone has had the opportunity to express if they'd like to go or not because they aren't frequent.
The easiest way to say it is that if there are going to be kids attending a meet, make it a maternity meet. Just as if you are planning on going to the pub you make it a Vets meet (or end the "official" part of it before pubbage).
A maternity meet could mean 10 RYLers with 12 kids, or it could mean 10 RYLers and one kid.
i didnt assume people weren't entitled to go, but just like vet's meets are for over 18s (vets) i would have thought it was easy to make a connection to 'maternity' meets to be for peolpe who have something to do with maternity. however if you want to come to a meet to discuss poo (consistency, frequency, appearance), sick (same applies) and food flinging/smearing... then be my guest.
Mand, South Wales, Full-time working, single mother to 2 scarily independent girls.
I AM A PROUD PLUMERIA SISTER
I mean RYL often gets scrutinised with the public, I can see an uproar if someone knew people were bringing their children along to meets. It just strikes me as not only, dare I say it, terribly irresponsible, but also just plainly bizarre and I would hate to think of the emotional impact on everyone involved, not just the mother or the child.
I just don't understand how you could justify taking a child, a child, to was is essentially a 'self harm group.' Sorry, but I find the whole thing disturbing and feel very strongly about it.
Maternity meets developed because in a short period of time, there were a lot of Mothers to be and mothers of young children on the boards, that wanted to meet up with their kids etc.
However, the problem arose when these mothers then wanted to take their kids to regular meets.
Hence the need for the clarification now.
Ideally you need some kind of distinction between MMeets where it's mainly mothers & fathers & kids going, and MMeets where it's a regular meet that just happens to have a kid going. But, again, overall I think children should be discouraged from going to meets on a regular basis. There are 14 year olds on here who aren't allowed to go to meets because they're too young, but there could be 11 year olds who are allowed to go.
i didnt assume people weren't entitled to go, but just like vet's meets are for over 18s (vets) i would have thought it was easy to make a connection to 'maternity' meets to be for peolpe who have something to do with maternity. however if you want to come to a meet to discuss poo (consistency, frequency, appearance), sick (same applies) and food flinging/smearing... then be my guest.
And what makes you think that's all the conversation will be about? Just because it's a maternity meet it doesn't mean all you'll be talking about is sick and sh*t. Besides that, i'd be going to meet my friends who happen to have children, i wouldn't be going just to see a bunch of babies - i could go to a nursery for that. It's adults meeting, who have children in common. There will be adult conversation. It will not constantly be about how many poo's your baby has had in the last 24 hours - even i know that the other mothers would soon TIRE of that.
The point of a maternity meet is to have adult company. Many mothers on here are SAHM's who aren't able to have adult interaction on a regular basis. They've obviously made friendships on RYL and wish to have adult interaction by meeting with friends.
I've miscarried, more than once, does that make me entitled to go to a maternity meet or not? Should i steal a baby just so i can go and meet friends who happen to be mothers?!
