Triggering (Suicide) - Stupid idiot drs *might get ranty*

[Becca]

Hi Craig,

Thanks for the lengthly reply. I'm in Wales. Yeah we have the NHS here. Couldn't get into see MP (not before my date anyway). I changed GP. Many times. The problem there isn't I don't think with the GP but with what my notes say. CAB were hopeless but I think that's probably cos it's a very small office (e.g. not a reflection on them in general) and the person there basically just uses google to find things (I can do that myself!). We do have a MIND but that's for the people with proper MH problems and as I don't have them I can't go there, also it's quite expensive for me to get there.

>>The type of behaviour that you're describing should've been stamped out years ago, and it makes me feel sick!<<

A lot of people have said that here when I've mentioned the treatment I've had or not as the case is. Odd as it's a really new department.

Sorry. I appreciate you trying. It's like there is just problems on problems on problems and the only person who has tried to do anything is me and I cannot go on like this. It's getting harder and harder to.

I never thought I would feel that suicide was a postive option. Odd how I do now and only after seeking help*.

Becca

*I should add that this is my experience and anyone thinking of asking for help reading this still should try. I don't get it because I'm a terrible person who has done awful things.

[DUNFERMLINEBOY]

Hey Becca!

Well if you're in Wales go and see your local Assembly Member or phone or write to them at the Welsh Assembly!

As far as MIND is concerned phone them up and talk to them but don't give up!

Wish I could be of more help!"!!!

[Becca]

The Welsh Assembly are the ones refusing funding for my treatment. It happened last time I saw a consultant in England as well. I complained loads but got nowhere at all.

Might try MIND again. Giving up seems the right thing to do right now. I can't cos I don't have enough to be sure.

I appreciate you trying. I appreciate you all trying. It's more than my drs have for sure.

I hate all of this. I really do

[DUNFERMLINEBOY]

Bleedin Nora! U have been through the wars haven't ya! Really hope that you get some resolution too this!

[Becca]

I'm still going through them which is the point really. Have been for years hence feeling it is time to chuck it all in really

[chocostashchick]

No no no no no!!!
it is NOT time to chuck it in
absolutely not!
you keep calling and give MIND a try again (i have no idea what that is but give it a try! i wish i knew more about your systems but i'm in the USA and clueless)
i've just started my hunt for treatment this past year, and i have had some issues as well (not for as long as you) but i am not giving up so you don't either!!!
there is hope as long as you want it, so keep wanting it and keep trying
know what, maybe you could go back to that horrid lady you saw today and just keep trying? still call MIND, but for the time being don't give up and go back to that lady and maybe she will refer you to another person or maybe she'll get a clue!
good luck and keep fighting Becca hun
xxxooo

[Becca]

Thanks for the message. I iwhs I could understnd how that appopintment managed to make everything even wores.

I didnt evne thikn it could

[chocostashchick]

aww Becca honey
i think depression makes it easy for our spirits to get crushed, that it makes us overly sensitive and catastrophise the littlest things
you have to fight it, understand that it isnt true, and keep going
you just have to keep fighting honey
it isn't as bad as it seems
you can do it!
xxxooo
keep updating

[Becca]

Looks like I'm losing the CPN I was given. So much for being honest about what I'm going through helping me. If I can't talk to them when things get really bad as they have over the past few days then how can I possibly talk to non professional people?



I need to find a way to bury it.

[chocostashchick]

what?
why are you losing your CPN??
i dont understand
is there anybody who understands the system there who has advice for Becca?

honey you cant give up
and honesty is always the best policy
advocate for yourself - they cant take away all of your supports!
what has happened?

[Becca]

Its because I was honest about feeling suicidal and having a plan and what's been going on. They said it was a waste of time me going if I'm just going to kill myself anyway.

I can see them again in two weeks but have to have stopped feeling this way.