no-one self harms where i live
may be 1 - 100,000 person ,
i feel so alone here but i know that there are many others in
the UK or whatever that faces the same issues ....
(hugs everybody)
A little angel fell into my arms at the 7th of december 2010
I've found help very easy to get in all three of the areas I've been living this last year (student on two campuses!) all within the UK
My home towns in UK and I got help with the space of a few hours of me saying I wanted it because I was having an op on my leg which meant my surgeon seeing my scars. He talked me into getting help and now I can apparently phone them up/ see them whenever I want. I know when I phoned them at a later date they were easily available.
Last year I lived in North London and my GP referred me on the basis of my depression- never told him about my SH and I got an appointment with a Psychologist within a few weeks but he was very busy and often our busy schedules both clashed.
This year in Hertfordshire I don't know about my GPs initial reaction about my SH as he read it off my notes but he seemed a bit disappointed that I felt like I couldn't tell him (bearing in mind I've seen him quite a few times for various health probs), he referred me to a couple of psychiatrists but I can't see them because due to my health problems I've had to give up uni for a year so have moved back up home but that only took a couple of weeks and he didn't seem too surprised (though I think he thought it was the stresses of the course that caused it but its almost the opposite in my case).
In Arizona, it's known about, but there's still alot of misconceptions. It is definitely seen as an "emo" thing, like everyone else has been saying. I had a behavioral health tech come straight out and tell me i was doing it for attention. she hadn't even ever talked to me before. so yeah, i don't know about the U.K., but it's not well understood in America.
I agree with many different factors mentioned so far and there is something else I've noticed and experienced with SI. Although there is limited understanding about it in the US, and the mental health professionals argue about it being attention seeking, it seems more expected or set that this is a behavior only female teenagers engage in. I've known male teenagers who engage in this as well - however if someone engages in this behavior beyond their teenage years, or engages in it as an adult, no one understands that, talks about it, or even acknowledges it - it just makes it that much harder to seek and receive treamtent out of the teenage years.
Life is made of moments in time - be with the moment.
Well I actually live in Canada and where I live SO many girls SI but not really. They do it for attention and you can tell because there's a clear difference, because they will go around showing people and complaining how it hurts, because it doesnt have any meaning to them.
The true SIers I know where I am wear long sleeved shirts and fake smiles, but it's hard being surrounded by posers who have it so easy and just feel the need to be noticed and start drama every second of the day.
"his face says a million words... they're just not the words I want to hear."
Longest without SI: 10 months
Last SI: January 29th 2008
Last Purge: May 2008
I got put on a waiting list for 6 month for CBT and a psych nurse to talk to.
That's the list I was on when I went into my GPs office saying I was highly suicidal and didn't see the point in living, after the pointless GP appointment I was left to wait for 6 month, feeling so suicidal. Nice or what?
On a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
My friends, therapist and GP are all very understanding and non judgemental. The psychiatrist I saw didn't think what I did amounted to anything, at least worthy of note on a risk assessment form, so didn't really pay attention or ask me about it.
The general public? I'd rather not find out. My other symptoms are trouble enough.
I live in south east England, and I don't know anything about the NHS and SI, as almost nobody knows I SI, but its seen as "emo" by everyone I can think of. I've heard people make jokes about "emo-safe scissors" and stuff.. I don't think its really accepted much by society. Bleh.
Since I was young I've tasted sorrow on my tounge.
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Within myself
I am currently:
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~longing~tears~
London, UK, here.
....The psychiatrist I saw didn't think what I did amounted to anything, at least worthy of note on a risk assessment form, so didn't really pay attention or ask me about it.
The general public? I'd rather not find out. My other symptoms are trouble enough.
Podunk, Wisconsin, US
That is exactly the treatment I got. I was told, by a psychiatrist, that it wasn't a serious thing to SI, to be careful where I cut, not to cut too deep, and if I did cut deep to get medical attention right away. They acted as if it was nothing to worry about at all.
Go home, take two asprin, and make sure to use a clean sharp blade was what it sounded like to me. This was all said with a look of disgust on his face too.
I'm in Manitoba, Canada.
Basically if people find out you get the whole 'emo' thing and stuff... Although, my best friend used to SI really badly (monday is 11 months free for her) and people have come to accept her scars at school and no one has called her emo (she dresses nothing like that anyways) ..
I know quite a few people who SI or have in the past, but they're all my close friends and it's a big reason in why we've all become so close... we can all relate.
But basically it's not something they educate us about.. no one likes to talk about it and you get the big stupid emo label most of the time when people find out.
Holding your head up is hard when you just want to stay on the ground.
Well I actually live in Canada and where I live SO many girls SI but not really. They do it for attention and you can tell because there's a clear difference, because they will go around showing people and complaining how it hurts, because it doesnt have any meaning to them.
The true SIers I know where I am wear long sleeved shirts and fake smiles, but it's hard being surrounded by posers who have it so easy and just feel the need to be noticed and start drama every second of the day.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rogalsgirl
I would very much like to meet these girls and rip their hair out.
You both seem very possessive of SI... what gives you the right to say that SI that's done for attention isn't "real" SI? Don't you think you'd have to be in a pretty bad place to resort to hurting yourself for attention? In my experience, most "attention seekers" do have very real, legitimate problems that have lead to a desperate need for attention. Just because their pain or their reaction to it is different than yours doesn't mean it's not real, and I don't think you should judge them for it. Sure it's not the same as what you do, but deciding that you know why they're really doing it, and what's going on in their lives, and making negative judgements about them based on that is exactly the same process that leads non-SIers to make negative judgements about what you would consider "real" SI.
Emotionally healthy, happy people don't feel the need to inflict injury on themselves. People who draw attention to their SI might be so lonely or so afraid of rejection that they feel that the only way they won't be alone or that people will like them is if they hurt themselves, or they might feel that hurting themselves is the only way that they can tell people that something is wrong and they need help. Whatever the purpose of SI, whether it's kept hidden or publicly displayed, it's always an act of despiration.
Emily
(\__/)
(O.o )
(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.
I think that while SI may not be any more accepted in the UK than it is here in the US, I think there it is publicized more in the UK. I know Harley has been on the news and the radio talking about RYL, and such. I've almost never seen any news/articles/radio reports on SI in the US. In fact, I can only think of one I've seen, and it was so awful I was embarrassed for the people who made it.
I remember someone posted a link to it on youtube on V2 a while back.
Well it breaks my heart to see you this way,
The beauty in life, where's it gone?
And somebody told me you were doing okay,
Somehow I guess they were wrong.
You both seem very possessive of SI... what gives you the right to say that SI that's done for attention isn't "real" SI? Don't you think you'd have to be in a pretty bad place to resort to hurting yourself for attention? In my experience, most "attention seekers" do have very real, legitimate problems that have lead to a desperate need for attention. Just because their pain or their reaction to it is different than yours doesn't mean it's not real, and I don't think you should judge them for it. Sure it's not the same as what you do, but deciding that you know why they're really doing it, and what's going on in their lives, and making negative judgements about them based on that is exactly the same process that leads non-SIers to make negative judgements about what you would consider "real" SI.
Emotionally healthy, happy people don't feel the need to inflict injury on themselves. People who draw attention to their SI might be so lonely or so afraid of rejection that they feel that the only way they won't be alone or that people will like them is if they hurt themselves, or they might feel that hurting themselves is the only way that they can tell people that something is wrong and they need help. Whatever the purpose of SI, whether it's kept hidden or publicly displayed, it's always an act of despiration.
Perrsonally, I can't stand it when people SH, show it off, and basically shove it in peoples faces. I'm not possessive of SH, I wish I could be rid of it.
I just hate the fact that these people have basically fuelled hatred, and mockery towards people like us, who self harm secretly, ashamed of themselves.
We're not attention seeking emos, who only do it because of attention purposes.
It doesn't matter what your age or gender is, self harming = Emo now. And It's all thanks to people who self harm, and show it off as if they're proud.
It makes me sick.
On a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
I've found some people to very ignorant when it comes to SI. On another forum I post on, I asked something regarding alcohol and medication. Someone replied and accused me of wanting to kill myself...
I live in the Fresno area in California. Among the friends I used to have it was a very common and known about thing. Even the majority of people in the city I live in didn't even give it a second thought when they learned about someone doing it.
But, if you go to the city which I work in, which is a thirty minute drive from the city I live in, it's entirely different. It's an upper class city, rich snobs and whatnot. Heh, even the other day, when we were on the line at work, one of the ladies got a scratch on her wrist and started saying how she looked like a "slicer" and then changed it to "cutter" when someone asked what she meant. No one there does it and, to be honest, no one there would react well to it.
It all depends on the group of people you're talking about. The gangsters in the slum part of town will give you crap for it. The rockers will (mostly) understand. The skaters will tell you to go die already. The old people will try to send you to church.
And it's very hard to even get appointments here when you have insurance. My friend is on a four month waiting list just to get back on her medications for bipolar. Four months for a psych appointment. She's tried telling them she's suicidal, hallucinating (her bipolar causes her to have auditory and visual hallucinations), in need of hospitalization, and they're ignoring her and telling her they won't do anything until she has her appointment and that she can't have one for another four months.
I think the UK is just more open about the issues affecting its citizens. Here, lots of things are covered up and not discussed. Even in the threads I've read about sex education in schools, the responses from those in the UK showed that their schools are more open and useful in discussions about contraceptives and sex than here in the US where most things like that are considered too inappropriate to discuss.
In my experience, girls will go to great lengths for attention.. just for nothing, really. Just for fun. Drama and attention is the "in" thing now, I mean, honestly, take a look at the media.
You really think that normal, healthy girls would be that desperate for attention that they'd go so far as to hurt themselves? Even if they're doing it to try to fit with what's "in," being that desperate to fit in is a damn good indication that something is seriously wrong. Maybe social pressure to conform to certain unrealistic ideals is part of what's going on for some of these girls, but that's a legitimate issue for them, and there's almost always more than that going on as most girls face the same social pressures but don't resort to that extreme level of maladaptive attention seeking behavior.
Also, I want to point out that histrionic personality disorder is recognized as a psychiatric disorder in both the DSM-IV and the ICD-10, and presumably you wouldn't blame the patient for the symptoms of the disorder. Well, most psychiatric disorders, especially personality disorders, are simply extreme forms of normal behaviors and traits, and it follows that subclinical levels of the trait are not the individual's fault either.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rogalsgirl
It's one thing to S.I and reach out to someone, or a few people, for help, but it's a complete mockery of the entire concept to S.I and brag and whine about it openly.
But the point I'm trying to make is that SI done for attention is part of the "concept of SI" too. It's not a mockery of SI because it is SI, it's just done for very different reasons than what we do. It's only the interpretation of attention-seeking as superficial and fake that makes it a mockery of the behavior, and that comes from the people who interpret it that way, not the people who actually do it.
I completely understand why you don't like it when people use SI to get attention -- I don't like it either when I see people talking about SI as though it's always attention-seeking, and of course the fact that it sometimes is attention-seeking contributes that that. But I also think that if more people understood that extreme attention-seeking behaviors also come from real problems, and didn't judge them for it, then there'd be a lot less negative stereotypes of SI in general, and it would be a lot easier to get past the attention-seeking stereotype.
Emily
(\__/)
(O.o )
(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.
