Help me find reasons to live?

[Juella]

Quote:

Apart from death, what do you think you need right now????

I wish I could become a better person. But I don't know how. No matter what I do, I always end up doing the wrong thing. The worst things I did in my life - lying, cheating, sleeping with people I had no feelings with - were done in a desperate attempt to make the other person feel better, to take away their pain. It always backfires. I try to do good, but I always make things worse in the end.

[one_step_closer]

Maybe those things didn't turn out the way you intended but that doesn't make you a bad person as you were trying to put other people first and we all make mistakes. You help people on here a lot. Also, you don't have to take away other peoples pain to make you a better person. Are there other things in your life you'd like to focus on that might make you feel better about yourself? I'm not suggesting that you need to improve on anything but are there things that might improve your self esteem?

[Juella]

Well, I am so deeply sorry that I no longer find time to get on here and help anyone. I know I am being selfish, asking for support without giving back.


I think I would feel a lot better about myself if I found a way to get out of my constant crippling debt, but that doesn't look like a posibility. Other than that, I don't even know what could make me feel any less awful about myself.

[one_step_closer]

You're not being selfish at all. Is there any debt counselling available in your area? I know that wouldn't solve your debt problems but it might help you to be able to cope better with them.