DBT - I am freaking out!!!!

[Snow White.]

*sits with you*

Honey, please remember DBT is a long course, and it's a long course because it isn't a magic fix on your life. It takes time, practice, and it isn't easy - but for those reasons, it has more power to become a helpful change in your life than any 'quick fix' ever could.

Why do you think you're doing this DBT course?

I can see how hard you're trying... trying is the most important thing, please, don't give up xxxx

[lozza]

ummmm

I am doing DBT because...
-I am sick and tired of feeling crap all the time
-I want my life back
-nothing has really helped in the past in regards to the depression and BPD
-I want to finally be able to complete my uni degree and after that get into counselling or youth work and really help others but I also know I cant do that until I am recovered...

...thank you for making me think about that aimee - its amazing the details you forget when everything is so messed up in your own head!!

I just wish I didnt have to be feeling this way anymore:( I hate it more than anything but yet its my safety and I am terrified of letting it go and stepping out into the world:s

[Snow White.]

I understand a lot, to a lot of what you've said. Last week I was telling my doctor how hard I was finding this semester, that I didn't think I'd make it through... she was telling me that it's the final semester of my degree - I'm 7/8 way there. But until she said it, it wasn't clear to me, yknow? And I hope for you that my asking that question has helped you consider those reasons of why you want to get better.

As much as depression etc is a huge safety net... recovery.. getting better, those goals you have are so strong, and they deserve a chance at rising over the safety of depression.

Actually... it reminds me of something I have on my wall. I think you'll like it....

The following content has been hidden - Reason : image

Maybe you should make something you can keep near to remind you of your reasons to keep fighting. Maybe print the picture, or write your reasons out, etc. But please don't give up.

These feelings are tough, and I understand you don't want to feel them any more. I completely understand. These thoughts are difficult, but you can get through them, I believe in you.

[shandy]

Ive never thought of depression as a safety net before, thats made me think.
Love the picture snow white.
How are you feeling Lozza?
Group again tomorrow, it comes round so quick.

[lozza]

I am really not good today... dissociated even before I really woke up:s

thank you aimee... where did u get the picture from? I think it would do well and be a nice reminder for me on my wall

how are you finding groups shandy? *thinking of you*

[Snow White.]

Hey love, the photo was on a calendar, its by Edward Monkton if you want to Google theres online stores with it too. Oh, its called The Butterfly of Freedom.

How are you doing?
Been thinking of you today xx

[lozza]

*cuddles isabelle* thank you and I am trying

aimee - not doing so great right now and I just dont know what to try and I feel really stuck:(

I shall see if I can find the picture online and may try and make it a point to get it printed off tomorrow....

how are you going aimee?

[Snow White.]

I'm okay, going to cuddle into bed. I need some super comfort tonight it, it sounds like you do too. What is comforting to you? Can you cuddle a carebear, snuggle under a blankey?
Or maybe distraction, searching online for things (i often get lost on line!)
Don't give up xxx

[lozza]

sounds like a good idea...
but I keep looking at my arm wanting to make it worse :s
an ex worker visited today and saw it and she freaked!!!!

I dont know how to stop myself anymore:s

[Snow White.]

Are you maybe able to read over your dbt sheets, try and relax a bit? Get a bit of space between you and these thoughts? Please try and keep away from tour arm. It won't help sweetheart xxx

[lozza]

I dont really have anything to go over though as I am only 2 weeks in:s

[shandy]

When is your next group, had number 3 today, it was ok but i find the trying to relax bits hard, i hope you managed to distract yourself from harm. I see you are from Australia, it seems strange talking to someone on the other side of the world doing the same course, tis a small world when you think about it.
Take Care

[lozza]

I have my 3rd group tomorrow night.. and yes I find the relaxation really hard too :( and especially in a group setting! I find doing it with my psych ok as its just me and her but yeh...

I was able to keep safe, somehow but yeh I am finding it really tough again today:(

what things did you cover in group number 3?

[[Luna]]

I'm currently doing DBT, we've just started Distress Tolerance. I have to say I'm finding it all really difficult too.
If you want to chat, pm me
*hugs*

[Sunshine]

i have my 4th group (or 5th cant remember) of dbt tomorrow and we tried the observe skill two weeks ago and i couldnt do it either, i kicked up a big fuss in group saying it made no sense and was stupid but ive tried it a few times over the past two weeks and i can do it for a few seconds and im slowly building it up so maybe try and set your self small goals like do it for 5 seconds and then get bigger by 5 seconds each time, i think the 3 mins they set in group is just unreaslistic first try and discougarging because you feel liek your doing it wrong so will never get the hang of it.

x

[lozza]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Auburn Petal

If you want to chat, pm me
*hugs*

thank you emma. same goes to you

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunshine

and i can do it for a few seconds and im slowly building it up so maybe try and set your self small goals like do it for 5 seconds and then get bigger by 5 seconds each time
x

thank you for that sunshine... gives me a bit of hope knowing it is possible to do (somehow!!!)

[lozza]

so today is DBT day and I hate having the mornings free as it leaves too much thinking time and I over analyise everything and I feel so anxious and worked up!!!

but about 2 hrs then I may leave... I just hate the waiting around - lol this is why I much prefer morning apts and especally if they are in melbourne!!!

oh well:(

[dontwantyoutoknow]

Let us know how it goes sweetie xx

[shandy]

hiya, sorry not replied before now, 3rd one was or seemed mainly going over 2nd one and yet another breathing/ relaxing one which i cant do, well not in groups anyway, struggle enough trying on me own.
I think you will have done yours by now, how did it go.
I am going for the weekly one to one in couple of hours, what joy, she picks up on everything this psychologist, lol cant get away with nothing.
I just feel bombarded with info right now, bit of overload i think, but we plod on.

Take care you all speak soon :)

[lozza]

*cuddles lots*

3rd group.... we went over emotional, reasonable and wise mind again (throughout the week I actually noticed going from one to another which I posted about..)
we went over 'observing' again (I am happy to say that a few others in the group are also struggling with this so we are not alone!!)
we also spoke about 'describing' and 'participating'

shandy I am not sure of how your group facilitators run things but mine goes other many different ways in which to focus on each of the skills... which I have found really helpful.... is it the same for you?

.....right now I am feeling... ummm very mad and angry
I am trying to cope the best I can with it... it is almost 12.30am and I am still awake:s

but baby steps right?

I got home alive which I didnt think I would - stupid weather but I swear if the weather was really bad then I wouldnt have :(
but then maybe bad weather would have just been an excuse?? I dont know but

I am FINE!!!!!!