How do I get help?

[[LittleMonster]]

I can't do the talking. I freeze up and can't do it so I guess I can't get help. . . Maybe I don't want it anymore. :(

[Sycamore]

Hey,

I know what you're going through, I'm at uni too and find it almost impossible to talk to doctors. My uni doesn't have a specialist counsellor for EDs, but I've finally bitten the bullet and talked to my GP and am waiting for a referral to a counsellor. It was incredibly hard, I put it off way too long and I was totally petrified of speaking to him but I know I finally made the right decision. Like you I clam up, and I want to claim everything is fine so I'll be left alone, but after a while of alternating between sitting there silent and apologising for not being able to explain I did finally manage to open up a little.

I'd check out student services and see what they offer. Anything you tell them is confidential, it won't affect your standing on your course. And do try and register with your GP and try and find a counsellor. I'm on a long waiting list for a referral so I'm thinking of joining a local support group at the university, I think it would help me to meet some people in the same situation as me, I find it far easier than doctors etc and I need something sooner than my referral is going to come (looks like I've over a months wait and now I'm determined I hate waiting). Do you think you'd find it easier talking to a support group than a doctor?

It's not fun to do these things alone. Sometimes I think I shouldn't be at university, I'm partway through a PhD which is stressful at the best of times and this is my first relapse at this university. I want to try and not tell my supervisor, I'm worried too about people telling me I shouldn't be here. But I want to try, I don't want to put my life on hold until I recover and sometimes the distraction of throwing myself into work helps. But like you at the moment I'm worn out and it's making it hard to keep going. I am worried, but now I've made some steps starting with non-threatening stuff like emailing student services rather than having to talk face to face I do actually feel a bit more positive about my chances.

Good luck :)

[[LittleMonster]]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sycamore

Hey,

I know what you're going through, I'm at uni too and find it almost impossible to talk to doctors. My uni doesn't have a specialist counsellor for EDs, but I've finally bitten the bullet and talked to my GP and am waiting for a referral to a counsellor. It was incredibly hard, I put it off way too long and I was totally petrified of speaking to him but I know I finally made the right decision. Like you I clam up, and I want to claim everything is fine so I'll be left alone, but after a while of alternating between sitting there silent and apologising for not being able to explain I did finally manage to open up a little.

I'd check out student services and see what they offer. Anything you tell them is confidential, it won't affect your standing on your course. And do try and register with your GP and try and find a counsellor. I'm on a long waiting list for a referral so I'm thinking of joining a local support group at the university, I think it would help me to meet some people in the same situation as me, I find it far easier than doctors etc and I need something sooner than my referral is going to come (looks like I've over a months wait and now I'm determined I hate waiting). Do you think you'd find it easier talking to a support group than a doctor?

It's not fun to do these things alone. Sometimes I think I shouldn't be at university, I'm partway through a PhD which is stressful at the best of times and this is my first relapse at this university. I want to try and not tell my supervisor, I'm worried too about people telling me I shouldn't be here. But I want to try, I don't want to put my life on hold until I recover and sometimes the distraction of throwing myself into work helps. But like you at the moment I'm worn out and it's making it hard to keep going. I am worried, but now I've made some steps starting with non-threatening stuff like emailing student services rather than having to talk face to face I do actually feel a bit more positive about my chances.

Good luck :)

Thankyou for the reply, it's good to know that you were like me but still managed to reach out for help. I think it may take me time, there's just no way I can talk about it to anyone really.

When I went to ED services the first time I went alone and answered the questions and did so at every appointment, I did lie sometimes as I couldn't admit it & I sat there in silence alot. The therapy didn't even help me, I fear that even if I do go get help there will be either a very long waiting list and/or they won't help me anyway.. I don't think i'm that ill to need help. I get told that I really need help but I don't see it.. But I know tonight is not gonna be afun night as I'm feeling unsafe.

I have registered with a GP on campus but they have one off campus too so I could go there. There are counsellors on campus & welfare officers who tell us to go and talk to them if we need to, but I don't wanna go talk to people who don't specialise in that sort of area. I've done so before & it was a bad experience and made me a lot worse to be honest.

I just wish that I had gone back to the GP at home to get referred up here as I'm more relaxed with my doctor's and know which ones to go to and which ones don't understand and it would be a whole lot easier, but I left it too late and kept procrastinating and suddenly I was here.
I deluded myself by thinking I'll get better & joined the gym too which is a stupid idea I know and a sports activity but will try not to abuse the privilege, I think they'd notice if I were anyway..

Work hasn't been a distraction yet as I haven't been given loads. But I do have work to do tonight but so un motivated, I know I won't do it and I know I'll just end up engaging in ED behaviours, it's just a vicious cycle.

I just know, right now, that I cannot open up at all when the majority of the time I don't see the problem