in all honesty, the car crash photos don't offend or upset me personally and that's why i haven't post reported them. but i just find it difficult to comprehend that they wouldn't recieve "triggering" label where pictures, that i personally consider less offensive or graphic, do.
There is one thread in the picture board at the moment that i (and i'm definately not the only one, especially considering the thread that has just been posted in this forum) find to be annoying. I appreciate that i have not gone about expressing my dislike for this thread in a very mature or constructive way, but there is only so many times you can hear "if you don't like it, don't look" .
i started this thread not to criticise or for the sake of complaining, just to bring up something i noticed to see if anyone else had noticed aswell.
I roll over and hold on tightly, and whisper "If they want you, they're gonna have to fight me,"
in all honesty, the car crash photos don't offend or upset me personally and that's why i haven't post reported them. but i just find it difficult to comprehend that they wouldn't recieve "triggering" label where pictures, that i personally consider less offensive or graphic, do.
There is one thread in the picture board at the moment that i (and i'm definately not the only one, especially considering the thread that has just been posted in this forum) find to be annoying. I appreciate that i have not gone about expressing my dislike for this thread in a very mature or constructive way, but there is only so many times you can hear "if you don't like it, don't look" .
i started this thread not to criticise or for the sake of complaining, just to bring up something i noticed to see if anyone else had noticed aswell.
I know, I didnt think you were doing it for the sake of complaining as I say, its nice to know what the feelings are around here. :) I cant remember the thread in all its detail BUT I think the photos are in a hide box and the thread starter did give a detailed 'if it triggers you,dont open.'
I cant remember if I said 'if you dont like it dont look' I dont think I did because my theory is, if you dont like it PR it and see if theres something we can do.
Thanks everyone for keep comments civil too,tis nice to see :)
Katie, I understand that, but you couldve PMd one of us about it surely....or something else?
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
I understand the inconsistencies are frustrating, we certainly don't go about trying to do it and will rectify them where we can. But equally frustrating is the lack of post reports: in order to bring about change we have to be alerted to the image/rude comments/etc. We have to know how you're feeling about these things (either via reports / PMs or e-mails at moderators@recoveryourlife.com).
This discussion will probably help to shape our opinions which we're coming to on the WAYW thread, so I do thank you for those.
And; what Liv said!
Quote:
Originally Posted by griddlebone
What I want to know is if so many people had a problem with the car crash thread then why have we not recieved one PR about it? (I know Lucy, this is not the intention of your thread and I'll address that with my opinion in a sec) but if the people who are posting saying they cant believe we kept a thread about car crashes actually bothered to PR it, then chances are it wouldnt be there by now.We work a lot of the basis of public opinion and a lot of the time we wont close threads unless the feeling of the members is that they dont want the thread there. I had seen the car crash thread and was amazed that no one at all has PRd it, but people would PR a thread with a full body shot! Im sick of people using the excuse that they cant be bothered to PR too....if you cant be bothered to PR, then dont complain about it.
Basically I think we were trying to give some sort of leeway with the formal wear thread, because we hadnt recieved many PRs saying it was triggering in comparison to when WAYWT was around. Yeah its inconsistent of us, but I think we were trying to find some sort of middle ground with it, if its not working and people dont like it, well thats good to know....feedback is good :)
In regards to us 'letting some members get away with murder' and penalising others.....well...I have to say Im kind of sick Im saying this, but PM us, email us etc, we want to know. PM me...I dont mind, even if I cant do anything about the situation I dont mind listening to a vent. But genuinely, were not here to victimise people and we can only help with the info were given. There are some people who will come under the mod radar time and time again, but were not sitting here waiting for certain people to break the rules, a lot of time it wont even be a mod who spots the rule break, so yeah....if you think someone is getting away with stuff, PM us or email us.
RYL is inconsistent and its one of those things we already work on behind the scenes. We dont always want to be an 'all or nothing' site....we do want to give some sort of freedom, I think if we continue to lock down all threads of the same nature and not give some sort of leeway, then itll just end up as an even more restricted site and we get enough complaints about that as it is :P
But thank you, for the feedback....I think sometimes we become unaware of the feeling surrounding certain issues, so its good to hear something like this....thanks for posting some constructive criticism!x
With the WAYWT thread, I read over the previous (pages) of discussion about it and I think the main concern in bringing it back was it being very triggering for those with eating disorders.
It's hard to balance the views of those who want it back because they enjoyed it, vs, the high risk of it triggering what is probably a large majority of members. This is where all the discussions seem to get stuck; can we please both parties? Is there a compromise?
Is it a case of if you don't like it, don't look? Or should we be aware that it has caused so much trouble it's likely going to cause it again?
One way to work towards the compromise is to heavily moderate the thread, and remove images that are deemed 'thinspo' poses, self depreciating comments etc... and we can certainly do this, but members have to understand that it comes with strict rules (which would be clearly outlined).
I hope you appreciate the need to consider both sides in these discussions. I don't want to start off another debate but I wanted to explain what we have to consider as moderators in the decision, and if anyone has anything particularly helpful about the return (or the non-return) that they'd like to express, now's the time, either here or PM me/another mod.
kinda of a tangent to the thread, but I just wanted ot say that, if we did brign in more blanket rules on things, I bet that there would be another set of people complainign we were too strict, and the word Nazi might get brought up again... . Basically, its the whole you cna't please everyone all of the time. By judging a lot of threads on a case by case basis (for an example all the various clothes threads) it means that more threads can stay, we are less 'strict' and yet still keep the members as safe as we can. The problem with the WAYWT thread is that it was used by three different 'groups' of people - those who used it for enjoyment and to see the clothes of other people, those who posted thinspo/triggering pictures on there, and those who got triggered by said pictures. Unless we can find a way of dealing with the latter two catogorise to keep peopel safe, the thread has got to stay off the boards. The priority has to be keeping memerbs safe, because whilst the thread was fun, this is a mental health forum; if you really care abotu fashion etc that much, there are other boards.
"I would be almighty in my own world of art, even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell." -Picasso
"No, painting is not done to decorate apartments. It is an instrument of war." - Picasso
'I have scars becuase I have a past; but they, like my past, do not define my future'
well, i sent a post report about a particular thread last night.
It does seem like i am being hypocritical, as i have complained heavily about a particular thread, which i could easily have chosen to ignore, and yet still carrying on this thread complaining about inconsistencies of what is and what isn't allowed to be posted. BUT i, and many others I'm sure, have suggested a solution to the thread(S) causing the llama to rear its funny little head.
Like i said, this isn't really about the WAYW thread at all, though it does seem like a lot of people want it back, nor is it really about the car crash photos. Just an observation/questioning of what kinds of images people find inappropriate.
(Hey Mods - i can be well behaved too!)
I roll over and hold on tightly, and whisper "If they want you, they're gonna have to fight me,"
but surely if RYL is a 'community', the wishes regarding the content of this forum should be decided on by the community as a whole rather than a few selected people?
There was already a multiple page thread discussing it (in fact there's been two, if not three), which is making the basis for the overall decision. I agree the community as a whole needs to have an input, but those ideas need to be pooled together, and that's what we're doing.
I think I was a mod during the WAYWTT discussion, if I wasn't a mod I was involved in the discussion - and it certainly wasn't a decision made lightly, or by one or two people. The discussions from the forum were the basis for the mods discussion, it was just pooling the general consensus of the forum - and certainly wasn't a flippant decision.
but surely if RYL is a 'community', the wishes regarding the content of this forum should be decided on by the community as a whole rather than a few selected people?
Recent (ish) major descisions made on RYL.
Removal of the WAYWT thread
Creation of an ED sub forum
Banning the terms 'ana' and 'mia' in deference to EDs
ALL of these had input from the community, whether in a public thread or in private PRs/PMs. With ALL of these, the direction the mods took was directly influenced by the oppinion of the comunity. We, as the 'select few' do enforce these changes, yes; but they were only brought about becuase thats what the community wanted.
Also, yes, RYL is a community, and therefore the content of the forums should be influenced by them. However, that does not mean if for soemstrange reason 90% of RYL turned around and said 'we want the site to have how ot care for animals as a priority over mental health issues' that it will happen. Becuase this is a mental health site. In the same way, if members want a thread back that we know, for a FACT, triggers people to high heven, it's not going to come back without serious consideration and rules and safty 'proceedures' so to speak.
"I would be almighty in my own world of art, even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell." -Picasso
"No, painting is not done to decorate apartments. It is an instrument of war." - Picasso
'I have scars becuase I have a past; but they, like my past, do not define my future'
well, i sent a post report about a particular thread last night.
It does seem like i am being hypocritical, as i have complained heavily about a particular thread, which i could easily have chosen to ignore, and yet still carrying on this thread complaining about inconsistencies of what is and what isn't allowed to be posted. BUT i, and many others I'm sure, have suggested a solution to the thread(S) causing the llama to rear its funny little head.
Like i said, this isn't really about the WAYW thread at all, though it does seem like a lot of people want it back, nor is it really about the car crash photos. Just an observation/questioning of what kinds of images people find inappropriate.
(Hey Mods - i can be well behaved too!)
*is tempted to give a gold star for good behaviour* :P
Just wanted to point out I have no problem with the issues you are raising or how you are raising them :) feedback is alwasy welcomed.
"I would be almighty in my own world of art, even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell." -Picasso
"No, painting is not done to decorate apartments. It is an instrument of war." - Picasso
'I have scars becuase I have a past; but they, like my past, do not define my future'
Again, I would like to specifically ask the mods what they think about what I said on page one? I just said it off hand when i posted, but I'd love to know what you think :)
The problem I see is that we have a group here of very very (and I mean this respectfully) sensitive people who are suceptable to many varying triggers.
It's not possible to protect everyone all the time form everything. Hence either the picture thread goes completely, or we have a 'take responsibility' clause. A middle ground is not possible in my opinion.
About this? I think this is the problem we are dealing with. I don't know what more to say because we don't have an answer for it; that's the problem, the lack of middle ground and the want vs trigger-bilitiy of the thread.
Did you have anything you wanted to say about it, or anything specifically you wanted feedback on?
I think the problem most people have is the general inconsistencies, rather than actual content. I, personally, see absolutely no difference between the 'dressed up' thread and any other 'clothes' thread. Both are showing full length photos of people (of all sizes) in clothes.
It also seems a bit silly to me that we cannot have a thread showing people being happy in clothes that they like, but we can show pictures of mangled cars. There will be members here who are triggered by that, much moreso than some clothes. We see people in clothes all day every day, but seeing car crashes aren't an everyday occurrence.
As for post-reporting it, well, what do you want people to say? I think this is a far more general issue that cannot really be properly discussed or thought about by way of a post-report.
The problem I see is that we have a group here of very very (and I mean this respectfully) sensitive people who are suceptable to many varying triggers.
It's not possible to protect everyone all the time form everything. Hence either the picture thread goes completely, or we have a 'take responsibility' clause. A middle ground is not possible in my opinion.
My personal oppinion (i.e. i'm nto speakign for the other mods, just myself) is that you are right about the fact there is no chance for a middle ground, but the two options I see are slightly different. Either we don't allow the thread or we allow it back with very strict moderation, and people posting on the thread will just have to accept that that is the case, and even the most borederline images/comments will get removed.
Unfortunatly I also don't agree that we have a group of very very sensitive members; a lot of the PRs we got about that thread said 'I dont usually trigger easily but this picture triggered me' . It was triggering for quite a large percentage of people, both 'sensitive' and not so. Though for the members more succepitble to pictorial triggers i am seriously concerned about what a thread like this one comming back with just a 'take responsibility clause' will do to them. this site should be saf,e first and foremost.
"I would be almighty in my own world of art, even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell." -Picasso
"No, painting is not done to decorate apartments. It is an instrument of war." - Picasso
'I have scars becuase I have a past; but they, like my past, do not define my future'
I think the problem most people have is the general inconsistencies, rather than actual content. I, personally, see absolutely no difference between the 'dressed up' thread and any other 'clothes' thread. Both are showing full length photos of people (of all sizes) in clothes.
I think this is what people are generally trying to say. No clothes threads or allow all kinds of clothes threads.
You can't lose hope when it's hopeless.
You gotta hope more,
then put your fingers in your ears and go,
"Blah blah blah blah!"
Claire,in the specific example of the car, we just want/wanted PRs saying 'I dont think this is appropriate' and it would probably have been acted on. Honestly it is that simple.
The difference with a dressed up thread is generally there is much less chance for and prevelence of thinspo pictures :/ which is a bit of a sad truth. With the dressed up thread I do think the focus is more on the clothes and the overall apperence of the person, rather than the size of the person, which is what the WAYWT thread turned into.
"I would be almighty in my own world of art, even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell." -Picasso
"No, painting is not done to decorate apartments. It is an instrument of war." - Picasso
'I have scars becuase I have a past; but they, like my past, do not define my future'
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