I don't want to get better, I have to hurt myself 'bad enough', then I'll get better.
This scares me because it's so relevant to me.
I'm terrified of myself.
There are remarkable things all the time, right in front of us,
but our eyes have like the clouds over the sun
and our lives are paler and poorer if we do not
see them for what they are. If nobody speaks of
remarkable things, how can they be called remarkable?"
I get drunk just so I can be even more depressed, I'm terrified that being happy means I'll lose control.
Laughing makes me feel so fake, it's almost like I'm another person for a while, and I hate that person more than I hate this person.
I've made a suicide video, just in case. I plan on making it better, perfect. One day I am almost certain that I am going to take that route.
It makes me feel so safe just being in the room with my new mental health person, and it scares me to feel safe, I wish I had the guts to ask to see her more often till I feel better. Till I feel suicide is not the answer.
~Beauty without intellence, is a materpiece painted on a napkin.~
the only reason i hate you is cos i really like you and i'll never have you
Crazed wolf in store "a mistake" admits Asda
Oh what can you say at the end of the day, was the plot so sound or the lines profound. Was there rather less grain than chaff. Oh what can you say at the end of the day. You can say you made them laugh.
Isaiah 43:1-3 "But now, this is what the Lord says - he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: 'Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.'"
I don't want to get better, I have to hurt myself 'bad enough', then I'll get better.
I feel exactly the same way. = /
oh non-believer, please believe me.
is there honestly nothing in this world
that keeps you living & breathing?
you're a ghost in your own
goddamn city.
I lashed out at somebody who didn't deserve it... but I liked it because, in a way, it made me feel strong to be able to hurt someone other than myself for a change. Does that make me a horrible person?
oh non-believer, please believe me.
is there honestly nothing in this world
that keeps you living & breathing?
you're a ghost in your own
goddamn city.
I'm so glad the different departments in my school don't keep contact. If the guidance office had been in on my last nurse visit, I'd be in a mental hospital.
They tell me to smile at work. I will smile when I have a reason to smile.
What's so wrong they ask. Well I'm lonely. I talk to people at work and in classes but nothing ever goes farther than that. Everyone I meet already has their own life and their own friends. I don't really seem to fit in anywhere. I hate valentines day. Everyone talks about their plans. I never have anyone. I never will. I try to act like I don't care.
Forget the risk and take the fall if it's what you want it's worth it all
Everyone tries to be like me and everyone does what I want. I don't even have to ask.
Everyone likes me. Everyone thinks I'm so nice and everyone thinks I'm their best friends. Everyone.
But what noone realizes is that I am a horrible person. I hurt people. And I'm manipulative.
Worst of all, I enjoy hurting people, I feel no regret because everyone lets me... And because no matter what I do to anyone, everyone comes crawling back because they don't see what I do to them.
