The Borderline Personality Disorder Thread

[Serendipity.]

I reckon they'll know you have issues, maybe just not the exact label..

[obscene_demeanor]

I don't mean like specifically knowing what your metal health diagnosis is, but rather knowing when your personality has changed. I don't know, I thought maybe some people wouldn't notice in some cases, even the close ones.

[Serendipity.]

These are the criteria. When you think about it, most of them are pretty noticeable!

1. Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.
2. A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterised by alternation between extremes of idealization and devaluation.
3. Identity disturbance - markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.
4. Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging, e.g. spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving or binge-eating.
5. Recurrent suicidal behaviour, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behaviour.
6. Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood, e.g. intense episodic dysphoria, irritability or anxiety, which usually lasts for between a few hours and several days.
7. Chronic feelings of emptiness
8. Inappropriate, intense anger, or difficulty controlling anger, e.g. frequent displays of temper, constant anger or recurrent physical fights.
9. Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.

Do you want to talk about why you're asking, what's going on for you?

[obscene_demeanor]

I don't have all the criteria, but I have a good portion of them. 6 or 7, maybe more (I say that because I don't know enough about some of the criteria to understand it to really make sure I fit it). I can't self diagnose, but I'm 17 so I wouldn't be diagnosed anyways. I've been told I have bipolar (but not officially diagnosed because, as said before, I'm not yet of age to be diagnosed with a specific mood or personality disorder). I've been diagnosed with a mood disorder NOS. But, it was a rushed diagnosis. BPD is the only thing that really explains my mood changes that change multiple times a day, drastically without any triggers or warning, and why my personality, aspirations, style, outlook on life (everything basically) changes. I tried asking my mom (who has bipolar) if it's common for those personality changes with bipolar (simply because she has it, and because doctors have said i probably have it), and she says that it sounds like BPD, but that if i had it, she would have noticed the personality changes. I guess it's all in my head? Though the outside things are minor things that no one would pick up on anyways (the way I speak, my positivity vs negativity- basically my outlook on life, the way I dress and do my hair, and makeup, my career choices, well, what I want to do, anyways).

[Serendipity.]

I think it's possible for these things to be much more noticeable / upsetting than they are to other people around you. I'm diagnosed with BPD, but my parents don't recognize it either. But at the end of the day, it doesn't really matter what you call it, as long as you get the right help for the symptoms that are causing you problems. Have you been able to talk to your doctor / other professionals about your experiences?

[Also, you're 17. It's fairly normal to change your style, career plans, etc. I hope that doesn't sound patronising, it's meant to be reassuring!]

[obscene_demeanor]

I know changing career and style are normal at this age, but I'm not entirely sure it's normal to do so multiple times a day, with my mood swings (though not always with the same type of mood). I've only been seeing my therapist a month now, because I lost health insurance for 7 months ._. and the old agency I was seeing wouldn't let me back because of it. We haven't really talked about much. 40 minutes isn't a long time, not nearly enough for any conversation, and this is just a sidenote, but I'm afraid that once a week isn't enough, but it's not like I can go more frequently.

[Nosamason]

i havent been diagnosed either, but based on my research, my explinations to my mom and even my doctor, i most likly have BPD , but i can try n get diagnossed but to affriand to call when im all alone..

[fragile as glass]

It is absolute rubbish that other people can guess if you have BPD unless they work within the mental health field or have family with the condition.

Plus, part of the 'criteria' means that you cannot be officially diagnosed with BPD until you are 18 years old. There is the odd exception but it's rare. Some people believe the same goes for bi-polar but I was 'confidently' diagnosed at 16 and told that 16 was the age for bi-polar diagnosis

[Serendipity.]

Why is it 'absolute rubbish'? It may be more helpful if you explain your reasoning. Also, all I said was that it's likely people will be able to tell you have issues, though perhaps not specifically BPD. Given that a large part of BPD concerns one's relationships and the way one interacts with others, that is not an unreasonable assumption. Apologies if it upsets people though...

[fragile as glass]

I did not mean people picking up on certain problems or symptoms as being rubbish. I have spent a year in a BPD ward and it was taught to us that our illness is not identifiable when being around others per se and that we are not our illness, we have a set of complex problems which, when put together, can identify what we suffer from but there is no invisible badge on us only visible by others saying what we suffer from.

The way someone with BPD interacts with others does play a big part in being diagnosed with BPD as does the inability to see grey, instead everything is black and white with no middle ground.

[Serendipity.]

But what I am saying is not that there is some invisible badge, but that certain aspects of your behaviour will be noticeable to people who know you (generic you, sorry).

I guess it is about finding a balance between realising that you are not your BPD, and recognizing the way in which your behaviour is noticeable to and does affect people around you.

[fragile as glass]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Serendipity.

But what I am saying is not that there is some invisible badge, but that certain aspects of your behaviour will be noticeable to people who know you (generic you, sorry).

Agree

I guess it is about finding a balance between realising that you are not your BPD, and recognizing the way in which your behaviour is noticeable to and does affect people around you.

Also true

[a_seething_one]

Wow...this is all confusing...

Can we just go back to the normal interactions with talking about how we're all doing?

[Doikers]

*Group Hugs*

[fragile as glass]

Sometimes avoiding differences of opinion or confusion regarding a subject is more harmful than facing it Dawn.

*Hugs Mark*

[a_seething_one]

Um...ok. Yeah I don't know what to say to that.

All I know is that I'm on this thread cause I need f*cking support.

[frenchhorn]

obscene demeanor asked a question, we could hardly ignore them and I think there is room for both support and discussion of things in this thread, especially when that discussion is something BPD related.

we are all on this thread for support, doesn't mean that we can't have discussions about stuff and we are not always going to agree on everything, after all we are humans from all different walks of life and backgrounds. Just because we disagree on something doesn't mean we can't support each other at the same time though.

[Serendipity.]

I honestly don't see the problem? If you need support, then ask for it - it doesn't mean other discussions can't happen too.

*slowly backs away from thread*

[Foxtrot Oscar]

Quote:

Originally Posted by frenchhorn

obscene demeanor asked a question, we could hardly ignore them and I think there is room for both support and discussion of things in this thread, especially when that discussion is something BPD related.

we are all on this thread for support, doesn't mean that we can't have discussions about stuff and we are not always going to agree on everything, after all we are humans from all different walks of life and backgrounds. Just because we disagree on something doesn't mean we can't support each other at the same time though.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Serendipity.

I honestly don't see the problem? If you need support, then ask for it - it doesn't mean other discussions can't happen too.

*slowly backs away from thread*

Completely agree with both of these points. How will we develop understanding around the diagnosis of borderline personality disorder and reduce the stigma surrounding it if discussions such as these do not occur? I found it very interesting, and, to be honest, felt like the thread was going in a more helpful direction. Discussions of that nature, and similar, would encourage me to post in this thread more regularly and, like has already been said, there is still room for support is there not?

[Doikers]

*Hugs Dawn* How are you , Hun?

*Hugs Oliver*How are you?

Hi Serendipity, *waves* are hugs okay?

Hey , Foxtrot Oscar , I like your potato :)