when i went to the priory i was shocked at how much i weighed and i promptly lost that weight. im scared in case i weigh even more than i did at my first weight in at the priory. i have an underactive thyroid which makes losing weight like walking through swamp water. if im under that top weight that i was i can breathe a sigh of relief and get to my target weight. if im over i know i'll get hysterical about it and restrict like mad as opposed to just restricting
GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE
THE COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN
AND THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
*hugs Cheryl and Mark* I had to go do some things since I was last here.
My memory of time is really messed up, so I don't know if it was last night or this morning..
But I need to talk a little, is that okay?
I want to see how many others I can find that have this problem.
"My name is not Bipolar, it's..."
'women and girls are more likely to be misdiagnosed, with 42% of females diagnosed with a mental disorder instead of autism.'
I started talking to someone from a different country about three weeks ago (I met him on a site for culture and language exchange) on Skype.
Long story short he asked me to marry him.
On top of that my Boyfriend wants me to move out in the next two months but still thinks we are going to date *rolls eyes* and I tried to find places on Craigslist but couldn't find anything suited for me and my problems..
I called my Mom to ask her for a little money to try to move into a place anyway, but she - as always- handed my Dad the phone and he said no.
I called my Sister and she had .19 cents left in her account! (lol, I am SOOO not surprised she has no money, she just bought a car and I used to lend her money every month for her and her Girlfriends meds and food.)
Out of desperation I called my friend P-Chan (That's how we met, he made a piggy noise while he was sitting behind me and he had a thing for me ever since) for the money.
He didn't have it, but said he would try to get a hold of his cousin to possibly let me stay him.
He said last resort - while he is deployed (airforce) I could live in his apartment..
I feel like I am taking advantage of him because..
The person who asked me to marry him..
I said yes._.;
So as you see my delema - boyfriend wants me to move out but still wants to date me; I might be living in someone house that has liked me for seven years BUT be engaged to someone I HAVE NEVER SEEN AND HAVE ONLY KNOWN FOR A MONTH!!
And then that's where the odd self harm begins.
If anyone actually wants to know - - It's okay if no one does!
I have other people to talk to about about the symptoms of all of this, but no one I can talk to can relate.
But it's okay if no one is ready for me.
"My name is not Bipolar, it's..."
'women and girls are more likely to be misdiagnosed, with 42% of females diagnosed with a mental disorder instead of autism.'
I know I must be careful, I told him I would marry him just so he could get his green card then he could leave!
lol, but I have been in mentally abusive relationship so I KIND OF know the signs to look for, and I will always be on here to keep you guys (my new friends) updated, so you can keep me in check.
But the icing on the cake..
Yesterday I got in the shower and shaved just about every inch of myself and SCRUBBED everything so hard in searing hot water.
I did it again (sans the shaving) and I realized that when I did it the night before I had scratched myself so hard with this.. pumice type of thing... that the water hurt even more!
I sang through the whole shower to cover up the sounds of pain because I didn't want my Boyfriend to hear.
After that, I went NUTS on my teeth!
Scrubbed everything so hard my teeth hurt!
I have done the teeth thing before but not that bad, and the same thing with the shower.
The last post was my trigger, I that out earlier today because someone once told me that there is a reason for everything we feel.
I just want to know if...
anyone... .... could.... .... ... .... .. relate.... ._.
"My name is not Bipolar, it's..."
'women and girls are more likely to be misdiagnosed, with 42% of females diagnosed with a mental disorder instead of autism.'
Help. I walk with a crutch after 17 years of self harm. My calves instead of being like two sirloin steaks are like mince. Half an hour ago I got off the sofa (I don't use the crutch around the house) and my legs gave way. I fell. Badly. Twisting my foot the other way in the process. I was on the floor 5 minutes before being able to get up. I fed and watered the chickens, rabbits and cat - after all I have responsibilities. But I was limping and could have cried in pain. I don't think anything is broke. I phoned my boyfriend at work to tell him and now he's on about cancelling the trip to see his family on monday. I know he's looking forward to it and I told him not to cancel - he was driving anyway and we're staying overnight. And my foot/ankle might be fine by then. How can I convince him not to cancel - I'll feel a selfish bitch if he does. I've dragged myself upstairs and into bed now. :(
GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE
THE COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN
AND THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
Hi Dawn, nice to see you. how are you doing? missed having you about.
Rabbit, I'm pretty certain marrying someone purely for a green card may be illegal, could be wrong though, but please be careful.
Mark, how are you doing? *hugs*
Liddy, like Mark said can you get to a minor injuries unit or a local walk in centre? They can check your ankle, it might be fractured and you don't know and even limping on it could be making it worse. *huggles*
Cheryl, how are you?
How are you Kat, Mason, and anyone else? (really sorry if I have missed you, not done intentionally)
"Never be a spectator of unfairness or studpidity. The grave will supply plenty of time for silence." Christopher Hitchens
'When words fail, music speaks'
I am transsexual and homoromantic and proud to be.
unless i crawl there i can't get to a minor injuries unit - plus i come from a medical background and am rarely wrong. i think i just need some sympathy :(
GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE
THE COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN
AND THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
