If you are feeling suicidal, post here...

[Heaven Knows]

I don't feel either. I feel useless and completely alone >.<
*squish* I already feel like I have given up. Gah.

[Mum24]

Not true thoughts Katie. Keep fighting. I'm with you through this.

[Heaven Knows]

I trying but don't know how much longer I can. It all feels like there's no point anymore.

[Charmed]

Come on Katie, you can do it, you're not alone honey, we are all here for you, promise hun. *hugs* There is a point, I know how hard it is to see the point, I really do, but in the end it will be worth it, you just had to keep going. *squished gently*

Rachel, how are you?

Im confused. I was nearly sectioned last night, I went too far... but i convinced them I wasn't suicidal... maybe I should of told them the truth. I don't know what to do. So confused.

[Heaven Knows]

I is trying but it's getting too hard now. Getting too much to keep living in past...flashbacks and nightmares and memories. Can't bring them back and I can't live without them...so mean I need to go?

Sorry confused Charmed. Telling truth might of helped - means get help. Glad you went to hospital to make sure okay <3

[Charmed]

Have you talked to your GP and everyone about this? You can live without them, you don't need to flashbacks and bad memories, its hard to let go. But you will be better without them. It doesnt mean you need to go at all, you need to stay hun, keep fight. Together remember? *hugs*

Thankyou, I have help, but I don't deserve it and it doesnt help, I don't want to be sectioned... it was an accident...

[Heaven Knows]

Have appointments tomorrow. GP and Nurse and Psych. Don't know if can tell though. Want to bring my friends back. It's all my fault they're dead - so I should be too. Haven't told anyone about flashbacks and nightmares - was gonna tell Psych tomorrow but not sure I can now. My brain isn't working and gonna be worse tomorrow and always means I stay quiet. Can't even write it all down.

*hugs* You deserve help. I know it was accident - but if got that far maybe they need know?

[Charmed]

I know its hard hun, but maybe you should tell, or at least try. They can't help unless you tell them. It's not your fault they're dead, no matter what happened it wasn't your fault and never will be and you definitely shouldn't be with them. They would want you to stay here and get better. Try for them <3 Why can't you write it down? Do they know about the flashbacks at all? Maybe you could mention flashbacks and they can ask you questions? Sometimes i find it hard to just say everything, but when questions are asked my brain functions better and i can answer each question seperately, still saying the same amount. If that makes sense? *hugs*

I really don't, all i do is hurt others. But thanyou *hugs more* I know what you are saying is right, but if I tell them they will make me stop and I don't think I can take stopping. Im just waiting until i go too far and don't make it to the hospital.

[Heaven Knows]

I dunno why I can't write it. Brain isn't working right at the moment. Not know about flashbacks. Not talked to psych since talking to CPN about abuse. Only told CPN but not everything. Didn't help so don't think they can. Try to mention to Psych but don't know if can. Maybe try the questioning thing. Might help, thanks. Should be with them. I never saved them - I should have. I'm a terrible person.

You don't hurt everyone - not hurt me. Always been nice to me. Always tried to help me *hugs*. Maybe not make you stop - just find something to put in place instead of it?

[Charmed]

Maybe you could print this off so you don't even have to say anything? Or your support thread? Your brain doesnt need to work then. Can you try getting some sleep? I know you are finding it difficult but even just resting can make it a little better. Do you feel more comfortable talking to your CPN or psych? Telling either, even just a little will help, even just getting it all out helps. They can help, it may take a while but you can get there. Hun you're not a terrible person, you are a kind and amazing person who is so supportive to everyone. Sometimes bad things happen to good people but that doesnt mean its your fault. *massive hugs Katie*

Thankyou for the kind words *hugs more* Maybe... thankyou. I have tried replacing, I always go back, they all want me to stop and not kill myself, but I can only do one. Sorry I know I am being annoying. Thankyou.

[Mum24]

Oh Katie, I agree with charmed. Please get help. In it together. Massive squish

Charmed, I understand being addicted to one thing. I am too. But if you're like me that one thing is gonna kill you and is hurting you. Please tell someone. You are never annoying. We luv u.

[out of ashes]

squishes everybody.
sorry katie, wasn't ignoring you. I just don't know were to begin, this day has been a nightmare. sorry honey.

[CaptainB2]

I'm more and more starting to get the feeling that I simply don't belong in this world. I wish I knew what was on the other side because I don't want to be here. I want out. I want to escape. What saddens me the most is that my family is completely unaware. I feel like they should know something's wrong but have completely ignored my cries for help. Do I have to just come out and say it? I don't want to though. I don't want to hurt them by letting them know besides they should know already. They should be able to tell. I feel like such a burden and I don't want to be anybody's problem anymore. I often think I truly am alone in this world. I just hate being so alone but then I wonder why anyone would ever want to be with me!

[freakangel]

Sorry again but I've been thinking a lot and well I ordered all the refills I could on my meds and pick them up tomorrow. I'm thinking it's time for me to go. My family would be better off without me screwing everything up. I'm tired of everything going wrong all the time and that I have no control over it, that I can't stop my thoughts about hurting myself, and that I can't fix what I've f&$;'Ed up. I'm about done, just waiting for tomorrow now...

[out of ashes]

ugh its crazy how fast my moods change, go from feeling good about myself, to hating myself in a split sec. damn feel very suicidal, panicky about he future. The reality of this not going to change any time soon has just hit me, it doesn't matter if i tell my brother or not, it not going to change nothing. Hmm before christmas i said i had a made plans to end this, just needed to get christmas and new year over, now I am struggling not to go through with it. ugh sorry

[Heaven Knows]

*leaves hugs for all*
No words but keep fighting guys <3
x Katie x

[getting_by]

out of ashes, CaptainB2 & freakangel- Hugs to you all.
Please keep fighting guys, reach out. You can all do this. It isn't time for any of you. I promise. Not time. Please. xx

Mum24- Holds close. Miss you. x

Charmed- Holds tight. I'm sorry things went so far darling. I am. Please keep fighting. Its not time to give up yet. I know you say it was a mistake and things just went a lil too far- but please be careful. It only takes one moment of it going to far before its too late. xx

Katie- *Grabs Katie... Holds tight* Not letting go honey. Please don't leave me.
Been useless, sorry.
You CAN do this honey. I believe in you. We all do.
Your doing amazingly, one step at a time.
Your an inspiration Katie.
*Cuddles close*
In this together. Remember.

Hang in there guys.

[Mum24]

Hugs Katie, Roli, out of ashes, charmed and captain b2

[Pilgrim]

I just wanted to say a quick hello. I moved three weeks ago and don't have Internet at the moment, that's why I wasn't on here for ages. I'm not fine, but I have been worse. Had a paranoia attack yesterday night and haven't been sleeping well for at least 6 weeks now. Very annoying. Am still waiting for my health insurance to accept me as a student so that I can go see a psychiatrist without having to pay anything.
I hope everyone is holding on!

@freakangel Please don't do this. Your family will never EVER be better off without you. My friend's dad commited suicide a couple of months ago and although he never really cared about his children and they had lots of trouble with him, everybody is totally devastated.
Remember that people love you and there is no going back. You only have one life and it is precious!

[Heaven Knows]

Pilgrim - good to hear from you again.


Gah. Not gonna lie - part of my just wants to jump off something on my way to my Psych appointment. Guess I would be put into the category of suicidal. Mhmm.