nope sorry not been on effexor. hope it keeps working! hows it going now?
i saw my nurse person, and did the whole i'm so happy totally fine routine for 15 mins. and now she wants to discharge me. oops.
xxx
hey silentdancer, thanks for the advice. I'm going to my doctors on monday because I haven't been sleeping well for the past 2 weeks which really isnt like me. Anyway, when I have to go back for SI and things, I will try and say all the other things as well.
just wondered if anyone has any advice on this, or has experienced similar things.
for a long time know i get these really severe feelings towards people, like one minute i can be getting on fine with my mum or sister, then they can say something, not even having a go at me or anything and i snap at them so easilyand then i hate them and dont want to see them, but then in a bit i dont hate them, also with my friends tomight we went for a walk and i hated them i just wanted to yell at them and tell them to shut up, but now i hate myself for thinking like that about them because i dont hate them, but i get these changes in feelings all the time with so many people, and i hate it, i dont know what to do.
was wondering if anyone else had anything like this, because it is really starting to worry me, because know i am starting to think things like i want to yell at them, punch them and i feel so much hatred that i want to kill them. i really scared about it, becasue i dont want to loose people over it.
Hey frenchhorn,
didn't see any recent posts from you about how Uni is going.
My first time posting here and it is alot to go through.
For me those feelings of uncontrollable rage were usually triggered- sometimes by a thought/ memory or my interpretation of what was said by the other person. Sometimes I feel like I am in my body and it is on auto pilot and I am just feeling myself be hurtful and aggressive and I can't stop. Fortunately or unfortunately I had a psychologist who told it to me straight- you are being a bully. That was wrong. It really hurt but by accepting the consequences including friends and relationship- I have tried through cognitive behaviour therapy to understand the "automatic thoughts" that are going through my mind.
E.g. Your friend might say " You are being silly" as a joke because they are enjoying your humour but you get a flash back of someone telling you this and your automatic thoughts were- they hate me- I am so stupid which makes you feel sad and angry- so you respond this way to your friends (who are totally lost because they didn't see how the dots connected in your brain).
With regards to Uni don't give up (I took longer to graduate but I did it eventually- take a break if you need to but don't ever think you can't- you can maybe just differently than other people).
~Happy tomatoes together we will be~
You say toe- may- toe, I say toe- mah- toe:
Let's call the whole thing- red
“It’s time to lead the third revolution, which is not to say we want to be at the top of the world, but to say we want to change the world. Because the way the world has been designed by men is not working. It’s not working for women, it’s not working for men,
it’s not working for polar bears.” Arianna Huffington 2014
So if you wanna burn yourself remember that I love you
If you wanna cut yourself remember that I love you
If you wanna kill yourself remember that I love you
Call me up before you're dead, we can make some plans instead Send me an IM, I'll be your friend
I have bipolar II or mood disorder NOS, not sure which (along with other diagnoses). NP hasn't specified lately. I'm April and you can feel free to call me that. :) I'm 21, married, in uni but close to graduating, am majoring in psychology & want to get my PhD in clinical psych, & I live in the States.
*hugs for everyone*
RYL family: Doikers is my brother
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter into another! - Anatole France.
Hallo April! Awww I didn't know you were my age and married! 'Grats!
I'm Anna. Bipolar Type I, PTSD, usually dissociate during episodes. Had a slip-up after 6 years of not harming. Am finally getting better. Other health issues: SLE and ovarian cancer, stage II last time we checked.
So if you wanna burn yourself remember that I love you
If you wanna cut yourself remember that I love you
If you wanna kill yourself remember that I love you
Call me up before you're dead, we can make some plans instead Send me an IM, I'll be your friend
Hiya Annie/Anna (which do you prefer?)!! :D I didn't know that you were MY age & married too... *hugs*
Other issues with me: PTSD, anxiety disorder NOS, EDNOS, & personality disorder NOS. >_< No other health issues, thank God. What's SLE? (sorry if that's a dense question )
*hides*
RYL family: Doikers is my brother
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter into another! - Anatole France.
(: Whichever's fine, but I'm partial to Annie. Anna is a bit more formal IMO.
SLE = Systemic Lupus Erythematosus. AKA my body is dumb and my immune system is allergic to it.
I'm not married, not officially! He lives in the Midlands (for now) and we see each other during weekends, but the relationship dynamics would have you believe we are.
So if you wanna burn yourself remember that I love you
If you wanna cut yourself remember that I love you
If you wanna kill yourself remember that I love you
Call me up before you're dead, we can make some plans instead Send me an IM, I'll be your friend
Ahh, SLE must be awful... to have your own body attacking you... in ways that you don't want it to. *hugs* I'm sorry that you have to go through that, as well as cancer at our age!!
Ahh, lol, I thought you meant that you were my age AND married... but yeh, I've been married since I was 20 (I'll be 22 in June). I love it... :) Married life is lovely, only problem is that my hubby "keeps" me from harming myself, "makes" me eat, etc... all good things but things that I don't want!! heh.
*hides some more*
RYL family: Doikers is my brother
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter into another! - Anatole France.
I started counselling again today. Counsellor is quite nice; we'll touch my bipolar/detachment next session.
We just might be in the road to being alright. (:
*offers hugs to any newcomers*
So if you wanna burn yourself remember that I love you
If you wanna cut yourself remember that I love you
If you wanna kill yourself remember that I love you
Call me up before you're dead, we can make some plans instead Send me an IM, I'll be your friend
Hello, I've not posted in this thread before, but it seems to fit. I recently received a diagnosis of having a "depressive illness", which I guess makes sense all things considered.
I don't know if anyone else has had a similar expereince, but overall, my mood tends to be far better than it used to be, but I hadn't contacted the system before. It is weird to have received a diagnosis now since things were on a completely different scale back then, and in that sense I'd come to see myself as not being depressed, even if I (without a diagnosis) saw myself as depressed a few years back. I'm still not sure what to make of the whole thing.
Random radio ___________This spiral
Static on tv ____________Has worn a groove so deep
Losing count of _________Can’t climb out
All the days and weeks ___Pathetic, painful need
no ones been on this thread for ages! anyone else still around?
glad it was a "good" high! my meds have totally wiped out the highs, the depression still comes tho. ergh. doesnt seem fair, they take away the good bit and leave the bad!
that inner restlessness is so odd, sometimes its a fun thing, and sometimes its just all nervesnous kind of energy restless.
just a little update, finally got my formal diagnosis. bipolar I and general anxiety disorder. atm suffering from a severe mixed episode which started in febuary and has been getting worse. but i am here and still fighting!!
one_step_closer: sorry to hear your struggling!!
FlutterbyAngel: its nice to hear you had an ok experience and you werent too destructive. good luck trying for a baby.
Kija: hey long time no see!! its rubbish when the high disappears and you still have the depression at times.
Hi, I only just noticed this thread :p...I was diagnosed with major depression nearly 3 years ago.
I have a question. Has anyone been on Zoloft (sertraline) and found that it made you almost too happy and energetic? I had to take it for a year and a half and my friends were always commenting on how I was too hyper and I noticed it too. I'm probably going to be put back on it soon and I'm wondering if thats a normal side effect or if I should ask to try something different.
"Some people get by, with a little understanding. Some people get by, with a whole lot more."
A thousand mile journey starts with the first step
Join Date: Oct 2009
I am currently:
I have a feeling I might be slipping back into depression again... Been feeling kinda low all the time (but not as low as when I was diagnosed with it) and I've begun cancelling on people during the day because I can't be bothered to go out... Even when I feel really guilty for staying in because it's so warm and sunny. And the amount of hours that I spend sleeping has increased dramatically... I'll fall asleep at 2 or 3 in the morning and I won't wake up till 1 or 2, or even 3 in the afternoon.
Urgh, I don't want to go back down this route again so soon after I was discharged from therapy...
I have been on a mood stabilizer like 3 times and every time I start feeling better and I just don't want to take it anymore and as much as I know I shouldn't I do....I don't want to have to depend on medication. I have taken antidepressants in the past and have actually gotten worse while on them. My doctor won't put me on one unless I'm on a mood stabilizer and sense my boyfriend just left town again to go back to work I'm kind of scared. I stopped taking my meds a few weeks back and now I don't want to relapse because he left town. I'm so confused I can't think straight I'm all over the place all the time and work is almost impossible now b/c i can't think clearly. My simple cashier job is now EXTREMELY hard. So frustrated...
:( Do you have understanding bosses? Maybe it's worth talking to them and explaining how you're feeling to see if they can help? *hugs* I know how hard it is trying to do the whole "pretending to be fine and I can do my job when inside head is a mess" thing.
Have had a really bad couple of weeks mentally, just feeling really down and rubbish for no real reason. Contemplating going back to the doctors but I don't really see the point.. I've used up my free NHS sessions of counselling (which achieved very little) so they'll just try and put me back on meds which will either turn me into a zombie, or make me throw up :-/ Ho hum.
)
