one step closer... there are loads of things that can be done with dissociation and its not all one way either. for some integration is the way of 'recovery' while for others becoming a mutually supportive system is more like it so its up to you what you want really. bodywork can be helpful. maybe recommend two books to your psychologist - the haunted self by van der hart and others, and trauma and the body by pat ogden and others... helpful books spesh for psychologists
eiana... i'd definitely share with your therapist. maybe ask them what they understand about dissociative issues beforehand and if they try to field it back to you just say you need to know if they understand that area at all cos its a trust issue? (which it quite understandably sounds like anyways)
katie... good to know you're about. sucks about the sunlight and heat stuff and i'm really sorry you've had that to cope with on top of everything else
had my final psychiatric assessment and now, at last, they've seen the flippin light and referred me to the psychologists. well hoo-f***ing-ray. it only took a year and i told you thats what needed to happen Dr. Idontknow!!!
rediscovered how music grounds me and makes things a heck more stable. been crying so much recently. triggered by so many things. filled in a dla form (was told to) and it made me a complete gibbering wreck
please folks dont forget your music collection if you're feeling rough and you know that it grounds you
now getting loads of body shocks for trying to share something here. this sucks so much sometimes :(
Hi... erm, I/we have a problem with disassociation too...
Through SA and bullying when I was young and SA I've experienced more recently. At the moment, my little is with me that came to me a few days ago. Before, I know I had a kind of alter that apparently protects me from things and she still does now.
Any ideas on how to deal with it?
Mm, sorry for posting in the wrong place if I have...
this is the right place to post
i have ones who protect me from bad things
sometime i feel bad that they have went though all the pain of the abuse .
but they said they were there so they could protect me
that is what yours is doing for you they are looking out for you
until you are able to handle what happened
all littles one want to know is that they are loved and they are safe
we have teddys and toys here for our littles inside and out
we make sure that they are protected from bad things
but it also depends on your systems i have 7 of them
and a lot of alters
ask the little one what she would like to make her feel safe
She likes me reading to her and talking to her and a lot of cuddly things. A friend has sent us some stories to read to her and we watched cartoons together, but she gets very scared at night.
I don't know whether we have DID but how we feel sometimes seems like disassociation and it's been called that before. We're waiting to see a pyschologist at the moment.
I see connecting the pieces and integrating as two separate things. :)
Katrina won't ever go away, nor Little Katie, but they are becoming less disconnected with me, and less disruptive in my life in the present - gradually.
I treasure and find precious my understandings and awareness.
hey guys
we're back
we had to go into hospital for a month because DID was getting way out of hand. Then two of our grandparents died in 48 hours, then we broke our RIGHT arm (great for finishing final piece in art) and ash's (host) gf broke up with him, all in a week
Before we went into hospital some of us had been drinking excessively, using prescription drugs recreationally, and we woke up in a kennel in the back yard. We discovered that the kennel incident is directly connected to the fact that we have a pup/cub alter inside and refuses to sleep anywhere but a kennel or a dog bed.
Ash found some really distressing documents written by one of us - blade. About a gang of guys and some heavy stuff about the dad....
*huge sigh*
i can be spending a reasonable day doing stuff, hum de dum dum, getting on with domestic chores and stuff and then my partner looks really upset, down, hurt
i ask what's going on, did i do/say anything or miss something out, and i get to find out a part i have no knowledge of has said really horrible things
this is not only revolting and intolerable for my partner but i get seriously suicidal when this happens
i know i can't push away/punish/block/reject or rebel others (parts) and i've tried writing, journaling, speaking internally and externally, pleading, often desperately, for kindness, understanding, love and to be gentle... and this time i got cross and said i'm the one who has to carry the can when they crap all over our relationship, and i get absolutely nothing back
i'm at such a loss and i can't stand this kind of thing hurting the feelings of my partner
i really don't know who to turn to. i have a crap local cmht, i'm in the queue for the psychologists (which i'm grateful for), i'm a therapist specialising, ironically, in the area of complex trauma and i can't find a therapist i don't know who is able to support me appropriately (and i'm on low income which sucks)
sorry. its boo hoo poor me time. i suppose i just want to vent and share. can't blame anyone for dismissing me as a jerk (and that's not fishing for pity/sympathy either)
f**k. i hate life so much sometimes
i'm wishing everyone here a shed load better than this
