i get obsessed with people.

[Broken Hallelujah]

Quote:

Originally Posted by RAWWR

i get like this too, my tutor at the moment, i am so obsessed! its not like i have a crush on her or anything, she just feels safe, and i just want her to hold me in her arms and tell me that everythings gonna be alright...does that make sense?

Totally i was the same since i got attached to my primary school teacher and then my yr 10 form tutor who became my first confident, i spent every lunch in her class doing home work. Then i got attached to my college tutor and more to the teaching assistant in my first college course, my second and last confident. In my first job i was major attached to a collegued randomly after she called me a sweet kid, that was months after she joined so not even right away.

They were all ages abit younger than my mom so i figure it's a mothers care thing, i badly craved their care and attention to the point i'd imagine being terribly ill or hurt in hospital.

It always terribly crushed me to leave those places behind and i still have dreams of being back in my school setting where it was safe, i'm 23!

Right now i don't have any person attachment, it feels lonely. I always thought i was slone this way.

[TheColdOne]

This thread = story of my life.

[whirlpools]

I used to get really attached to people. It happened a lot with my school teachers and then with mental health professionals. I imagine I have a combination of the 'adult attachment styles' due to issues in my childhood and they change intermittently during time or from person-to-person.

Work in therapy can help you to develop a more 'secure' attachment style, as can being supported to be relatively independent in your everyday life. I find that the more capable you discover you are, the more confidence you have in your ability to self-soothe and look after yourself - but, obviously, discovering that emotional connection is important and comfortable too. The idea is to not be overdependent or underdependent, or to feel undeserving of someone's care.

[Dwyn]

Oh my gosh!! I'm SO glad that I'm not alone! And by reading some of the thread, I'm not the only one. :)

I used to think that my becoming obsessed with some people was crazy and stalkerish. I got this way with two of my best friends, both of whom helped me through a lot of stuff. If they didn't reply to my texts, I'd freak out! It's like I wanted AND needed them to care about me, and I always wanted to be a part of their life and to be with them.

I'm just so glad it's not only me. :)

[BabySteps]

why do you think this is? anyone got any thoughts? i can relate to this too about tutors

[Broken Hallelujah]

Quote:

Originally Posted by BabySteps

why do you think this is? anyone got any thoughts? i can relate to this too about tutors

With me i find it's always elder women that are mothers and i want them t care about me like a child, besides being 23 i am probably still emotionally immature. It's not like i didn't get attention by my own parents either but with a disabled sister sometimes there isn;t enough time to talk to us because of her constant care. The adults i got emotionally attached to and obsessed with were actually people i felt safe and unjudged with to be talk to.

I felt that way towards my best friend who is also older than me but she totally broke my heart and spirit and faith in humanity along with it. Currently obsessed free from people.

I'm not sure if that was what you were looking for, that's my personal experiance :]

[Dev]

I have this too, I get too attached to people that show they care for me... Recently, a girl's been caring and worrying a lot about me, like no one ever did before. We're really alike, and I feel like I'm starting to be obsessed with her.

[Gone.]

I find that I also do this. As in, in a place I feel insecure there will be people I become 'obsessed' with. I'll know when they're working or whether I'll see them and I can go out of my way to see them, even if I don't say anything to them or whatever. I mean, I can tell if I'm feeling in an emotionally better place because I don't need to 'obsess' over people as much. It was a lot worse at school than it is now.

Typically, I will pick out females that can range from a year or two older than me to a lot older. There isn't a specific stereotype, only that characteristic, I think.

[AandM4119]

I am the SAME way. Always females who I look up to. I thought I was the only one who was like this! I'd love to hear advice from doctors if you go.

[ennae]

I have always been obsessed like this with certain men - not women. There is nothing sexual in it at all - since I am scared of such relationships - but I think they take on a father-like figure. It kind of makes sense since my father left when I was 5 and I didn't really have any father figures until I started 'obsessing' which was probably mid-high school. I have been told it is a common Borderline Personality Disorder trait. I think it has got better since seeing a psychologist because I know I will see him each week and there are strict boundaries. I also have better friendships etc now which I have been told should help.