The Honesty Box

[Dreamer And Believer]

I'm still really scared.

[deep_n_meaningful]

I want to lose control, because when i do i feel good, but when i'm in control i feel like i have a monster inside of me.

[pixiedust]

I want to stop eating and restrict again yet I'm struggling not to binge.

I want to cut the letter S into my leg. The only thing stopping me at the moment is the fear of getting found out in a few weeks. I don't normally like scars but I want this one to scar and last forever.

I still think about ODing.

[ThinkingofRecovery]

I know the HR manager saw through me - I'm struggling to live let alone work. I need to cut again - twice in one day means it is getting out of hand again. I need to find a way out but can't. Reduced what I ate today but making up for it in alcohol calories. So confused and scared.

[ravynsoul]

I want to give up recovering... I don't think i can do it anymore. And the thoughts of suicide are coming back increasingly. I'm scared it won't be long before my depression comes back in full swing. If it does, I'm not sure I'm going to fight it anymore... I have enough different plans in place.. I will be successful if I chose that route.

[ThinkingofRecovery]

i don't know if i can stop myself from running away

[MammaMia]

I can't go a day, two at most, without cutting at the minute.

[Damnation.]

I wonder if I'm starting to become a substance abuser

[ksdfjhlksajf]

The following content has been hidden - Reason : ED Trigger

I really don't care anymore.

I'm dizzy. I don't want to eat and I don't want to binge again. But I'm dizzy every time I get out of bed.

And I just keep cutting. But that's not such a big deal I suppose.

I just wish I could disappear...

i'm scared of what i might do to myself if i can't come back

[NoOneImportant]

Now I lay me down at night
I no longer have the will to fight
If I should die before I wake
The world will be a better place

[rowena]

I think I enjoy self destruction.

[riley.]

for the first time in my life i feel like i could look after myself, i just cant afford it

[dysprositos]

I worry that I'm absolutely beyond help.

[Amaryllis]

I'm scared to tell anyone what my plans are because they might stop me or take things the wrong way.

[lasting]

i'm stealing my moms antidepressants. i know it's dangerous.

but what if i don't care. what if i just want to feel better.
sometimes they work. sometimes they don't.

sometimes they work a little too well.

i don't know what the hell i'm doing.

[ksdfjhlksajf]

Part of me just accepts all of this.

So what if I cut? So what if my eating habits are far from normal?

I just can't talk about it.

[~phoenix~]

If it wasn't for my son, I think I'd be dead by now. The urge is so strong, but my son needs me here.

[Insouciance]

I'm starting to take unacceptable risks.

[blondiebear]

I'm starting to wonder if bulimia would help my weight problem.
I wonder why I can't seem to let go of being needy.
Alcohol is starting to look good even though I've been sober a long time.