Triggering (SI/OD) - Ok... I'm Going I.P.... For A While.
I'm going inpatient at my local hospital.
Tomorrow morning.
I don't know how long for, though.
They said to me they would keep me in for a week, to do 'observations' of my mental health and my 'current state.'
They also said it's to keep me safe...
...Since I have overdosed in the past week, twice, one of them being a suicide attempt - and if they see the scars all over my arms and legs - they will want to keep me in for longer, won't they?
Does anyone know what I should expect when I arrive?
I'm confused.
"How can I be a gynecologist? I can barely look a woman in the eye!"
♥
No Ive been in psych hospital before and many, many patients have scars on their bodies. It certainly does not mean they will want to keep you longer. I have a lot of scarring and I had fresh cuts when I was admitted , and they were monitoring my blood pressure a lot because my weight was low and they just ignored it. They did not keep be longer because of this. Most hospitals try and keep you the shortest time they possibly can to stabalise your mental health, because there is a growing emphasis on community based care. Remember you are not under section ( I think), so you have a lot more influence over when you are able to leave.
When you arrive you are usually assessed by a psychiatrist on the ward about your current mental state. Then one of the nursing staff should sit with you and fill in basic details forms like address etc. They may do basic medical checks. On my ward we had to have blood tests when we were admitted to check if we had taken any thing, height, weight, a numbers of mini physical tests like crouching and getting up again ( I made a spectacular mess of that and ended up spead eagled on the floor in front of the psychiatrist!!) to check your motor responses are working right. Then they will check through your bag and things for sharps, pills etc and show you to your room. You should also be allocated a primary care nurse, who is essentially your first point of contact while you are on the ward for support. They will meet with you on a one to one and can talk about your feelings, give you support, answer any questions you have, advocate for you to other professionals- all those kind of things!
Life on the ward can be exceedingly dull. I ended up living off green tea and trashy magazines for most of the time! They usually have a group program which you can join in optionally which can help things move faster. I did an art one and a walking one. You should get to see your treating psychiatrist on the ward atleast once a week, and you should have a ward round, where a number of professionals involved in your care meet with you to discuss how things are going, raise any concerns and they will also be responsible for discussing your discharge with you decide you are ready. I found it helped to have a notebook and wrote down points I wanted to say because it can be a bit intimidating being faced with a room full of professionals.
Hospital is by no means a picnic. It can be scary, you may see patients who are exceedingly unwell and very distressed. But it works in a practical sense- it can keep you safe. It gives you a break from the outside world where someone else takes responsibility away from you so you can rest up a bit, catch up on sleep and revaluate. It will also give your team some time to think of the best ways to help you, so that when you do go home, you will have the best possible support in helping you get well.
I hope this helps a bit! Good luck and keep us posted.
*cuddles*
Good luck sweetie
Try not to worry about it too much
And remember they cannot help you if you do not let them.
When you arrive they will most probably just explain about the routine and any rules there and show you around a bit.
Take care of yourself sweetie
Going inpatient doesn't have to be a bad thing and if you let it, it can be a very good helpful thing.
Much love
<3
You're entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are.
I'm going in about ten minutes.
Thank you guys for all your help.
I am NOT under section, so at least I do have more leeway in choosing when I go home...
Anyway I don't know if I can get on RYL but I will keep you updated somehow.
Another member has offered to keep you guys updated anyway, I'm going to send her text messages.
x
"How can I be a gynecologist? I can barely look a woman in the eye!"
♥
Heya guys - im the "other member" Katie mentioned, so please feel free to PM me if you like. I will keep this thread going so you know how she is. Ok? Thanks for supporting her guys. She's such a wonderful person and she means the world to me.
Ive just text her... When she replies I'll let you know - okies.
Been speaking to Katie. She seems ok, just a little lonely. She will be in for a minimum of two weeks. She has her own room. She's not allowed on RYL, but I will keep you all updated.
She doesnt want to be there but wants the help at the same time.
Her housemate/friend can visit. And her Mum too.
She can watch TV.
She's lost all her sharps.
She has a really good sounding programme of help to go through in there. Its not much fun, but you need what you need ay?!
She is ok - just a little bored.
Like before - PM me if you wanna know anything. Im sure she'd appreciate any messages of support that I can tell her via text. HINT HINT. lol.
Hey i dont know you that well either Katie but when i spoke to you the other day i was really worried about you.i am glad you are safe and hope the hospital helps.i am proud of you for going!Take care.
Bleeding_wrists18 thanks for keeping this thread updated and continuing to let us know how Katie is!Really grateful.Please make sure she gets my best wishes and i hope you are ok too!
i do not always manage to be around but i wish you all the very best - love and luck to you all!
Spoke to Katie again tonight. She is very bored and on "suicide watch" which she says is ridiculous because obviously they've taken everything off her. She has group therapy every morning until lunch and then has to "socialise" all afternoon. RYL is blocked to her, as although she has her laptop, she has to use their wireless internet. And she's only allowed on for like a hour or less a day. She's very lonely, and scared, as she tells me the drs are saying "if" they release her and not "when". I've been ressuring her that maybe they said it like that mistakenly. But yeah, it does sound a bit scary. Part of her wants to leave but the other part is scared of what she'll do to herself outside the safety. She sent me a photo of her wing of the hospital and it looks like a really nice place - country type - friendly. Or as "nice" and "friendly" as a mental health place can be anyway. She is kinda distressed about seeing other patients that are REALLY mentally ill. She finds it really disturbing. She seems really scared and lonely, but I know she's glad to be safe.
Thanks so much for the continued support guys. It means a lot to her (and me).
Thanks so much for updating us.
It sounds like she's really lonely...
I mean, imagine not being able to go on RYL!
This website helps you!
Out of interest, how do you get in contact with her?
Do you ring her, or text her, or what?
Hello guys...
I've managed to log on to RYL on my mobile phone, I was bored and decided to see if I could get any internet access. It's not a strong signal, but enough.
Yay.
I can't come on again though, if the nurses find out I'm gonna be in real trouble.
Anyway I am grateful for all the messages of support, I'm glad you all miss me.
I'm going to tell you a little bit about the hospital, if you don't mind.
It's not bad.. it's actually a nice place, aka the grounds are really nice (scenery is amazing).
On my first day there, I got all my blades and pills taken away (totally unfair, but safe I guess). Then I was assessed by a psychiatrist, given a blood test and shown to my room.
The other patients were in the building at the time too, in the TV Room. The TV Room is like a place where patients can hang out and socialise, which the staff insist on.
I have to take loads of medication, and I want to refuse them but I'm not going to, I'm taking them - because the sooner I respond to my treatment, the sooner I can get out.
As bleeding_wrists18 told you I am on suicide watch, which is totally stupid because there is like NOTHING I can kill myself with...
My daily programme of activities goes like this -
8am - Get Woken Up
Morning 9am - 12pm GROUP THERAPY
Lunchtime 12pm - 1pm
1pm - 5pm SOCIAL TIME (kind of boring, but eh...)
5pm - 6pm DINNER/TEA
6pm - 7pm TALKING SESSIONS (With a nurse, psychiatrist about how I'm settling in etc)
7pm - 8pm GO OUT (With a nurse, I'm allowed to like go out of the grounds for a bit, for some fresh air, to walk etc...)
8pm - 10pm FREE TIME TO DO WHATEVER I WANT
10pm - 11pm (Bedtime, but it's the time I am usually on MSN). If you want to talk to me, catch me then. x
Now I have really got to go, because like I said I am on suicide watch and they check me every 30 minutes... x
I'm so glad I managed to get on here, I don't know when I am going to be on next.
But just so you guys know.. I am OK.
Bye x
"How can I be a gynecologist? I can barely look a woman in the eye!"
♥
hey there hun, i know what youre going through. ive been in hospitals many many many times. stick to what the docs ask you and you'll be out in no time. take care of yourself.
Rockabye baby, Broken and scarred,
You didn’t know life would be this hard.
Time to end the pain you hid so well
And down you’ll come baby,
Straight back to hell
Heya, I spoke to Katie again last night, on MSN and through text.
She has made a friend - which i'm really pleased about. They reckon that if she sdoesnt respond to the medication in a week they may have to keep her in a month plus. *cries*
But she's being really strong and at least she is accepting the help.
I feel so bad for her.
*sobs*
mj
x x x x
" my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never, never leave you during your times of trials and suffering. When you see only one set of footprints it was then that I carried you" you were carried out of are lifes into the next and when its my time to leave this life I know i will be carried into the next life with you.
I wish i had my world complete again.
'Can we protend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars, i could really use a wish right now' BoB
