Triggering (SI) - So Angry!

[Kirsty109]

I am so angry at the moment!

I HAD a best friend. We were best friends for seven years! We fell out a couple of months ago, she chose her bf of 5months over me, which is fine coz lets face it thats her loss. I tried to sort things out but she didnt want to know. But thats not why I'm angry because im over the fact she dont wanna know me.
What I cant get over is what has just happened...

I'm sittin here minding my own business when an old friend from school messages me. (I havent spoke to them for aaaages) I wasnt that close to them.
They start goin on about all this stuff about my past, some of it that I'd only told my ex best friend before finally admitting to me that it was her who told them!
I am so infuriated right now!
How dare she! Even if we are not talking that doesnt give her the right to tell people things

I'm actually feeling sick at the thought of her telling people. I mean who else has she told??

And now I've broken it. I was almost at my 5month mark of not cutting. And I've done it. I am angry at her, angry at myself.

I wish I could learn to cry. I'm sure the feeling of release would be similar

Kirsty x

Ps. on a slightly more postive note. Its good to be back I missed having somewhere to talk xx

[Tig]

Hey,

I'm so sorry to hear that your ex best friend betrayed you in this way. That must have been very upsetting for you and very difficult, it is understandable that you are angry. It's completely unacceptable what your friend did but please concentrate on the fact that she can no longer destroy your life. Yes, she's broken your trust and told people some very hurtful things that you probably wanted to keep private but you can't let her upset you and damage you. Remain strong sweetheart, prove to people that you can keep fighting this because you can, for you. Not for your friend, but for you.
You have slipped up with the self harming but you can try again. Keep trying until you succeed. Never give up on giving up. I don't really have much advice because the situation has happened but I think you need to get back out there, back on to the road of recovery and not let this push you back.

Take care,

Lotti x

[confuzzled]

I’m so sorry to hear that your ex friend has done. She had no right to do that to you and I can only say just how sorry I am, that someone has broken your trust, even if you’re no longer friends.
Do you think you can confront the person who has been telling people about your past?
At the end of the day honey, you might be hurt by what she has done, but you’re still on top of all this. You’ve fought through the past and you’re dealing with it the only way you know how to now which is the best you can do.
Can I just say a well done for being almost 5 months free, I get the impression that you think that now that you have had a slip up that you think you are no longer in recovery, and that you have achieved nothing. How about you look at it as just a slip, you’re not off the road and that you can still carry on with revovery. After all, slipping up is a part of recovery, it’s common and you’ve done so well up to now, this incident doesn’t mean that you have to give everything up.

Now you take care honey.

Chloe. xx

[((deleted))]

Well done on being free for 5 months. You have had a slip up- but that doesn't mean you have failed, just that you needed a release when having a bad time. A positive thing to do would be to find some techniques to help you next time you have the urge to cut.

It's horrible when someone betrays your trust- and it hurts. It's healthy to be angry about it but don't turn that anger in on yourself or let the anger rule you. Express it healthily- tell your ex best friend that it is not acceptable to break trust and ask her how she'd feel if you betrayed her confidence.

*hugs* you're doing great at dealing with this!