Triggering (SI) - Just need a cuddle ?

_plastic · 20-12-2007, 06:38 PM

3 months free ! thats more than i can take i feel like crap and i just don't have the energy to talk and everybody is giving me that look like i'm kinda freak or psycho ...everybody !
I slipped up into SI again , thats not the problem ! The problem is I really don't wanna give up i can't imagine my life without SI it's not like i've been SI-ing my whole life it's just the past 2 years !
To make that worse my sis told me today that she heard me crying at night and when she woke up she said : " you were crying in your sleep , I wanted to wake you up but i didn't..."
And she gave me that look ! The pity look yea she knows how ****ed up i am now...the mask is falling apart !
I have no energy to talk to to do anything at all i just wanna cut and bleed thats all i can think about at the moment .
I have to see my therapist soon and he'll see me soaking in depression - hahah how lovely is that !

behindblueyes · 20-12-2007, 07:27 PM

You are NOT a **** up I promise you that. You are one of he most amazing people I know... I swear. I hate to see that you are hurting so much i really do... I wuld want nothing more then to see a smilee on that gorgeous face of yours. If yo ever need anything you know where I am okay?

Love you... alot.
*hugs and cuddles*
x Kate

Queer Fringe · 23-12-2007, 09:48 PM

You are not alone I can tell you that. I don't really know what to write except that I am going to see my psychiatrist again who sent me away saying I'm fine even though I told him x amount of times I wasn't. He's going to see me breaking apart again and he's not going to know what to do.
But anyway it's not about me, I don't really know you but I think you are great and strong, yeah, u will have slip-ups and sink back down, but that will be part of the healing process hun, stay strong, people care.
xx

Jelly Head · 23-12-2007, 11:00 PM

^ Like 'Queer Fringe' said, your not alone.
3 months free is an AMAZing acheivement hun, really it is.
Try and keep yourself safe because these feelings will pass. You just have to fight through them. It's not easy, i know that but you can do it, yeh.
Stay strong and take care .xx *love & hugs*

Cazki · 24-12-2007, 12:11 AM

Hello there i know i dont know you but i just wanted to say that your not a **** up at all. Your really amazing 2 months is brilliant!! Im here if you need anyone to talk to ok. We are all here for you to support you ok. *Gives you a big hug* *comforts you*

Please take care best wishes Ian xxxxx