You're doing a great job being positive and recovery-oriented! It's understandable that what you went through is traumatic and you can't just snap into a happy mode. But you're managing great. There's no particular deadline as for when you have to move on from the situation. It might take time and it's okay. You're being brave already.
As for the whole situation with not having anything to do - have you considered something like online courses, so you can both have something to do, but not have the pressure to reguralry attend something? Do you think it could work for you?
I hope you understand that this situation is not your fault at all. You've been feeling unwell, and that's never your fault.
Did your psychiatrist tell you why they aren't going to see you?
Good luck with your assesment! *cautiously leaves a hug in case one is needed*
Hope it went well love. Let us know how you are when you can. I know your phone is broke but you can contact me if you need anything. I'm happy to come up to you and we can just drink coffee and giggle like usual.
Thank you lovelies. Your support means so much. I'm always reading even if I don't always reply promptly!
Valerie your words always warm my heart, genuinely I appreciate it so much. You're right, I'm still alive and even if that's all I can manage some days that's okay I suppose. Yep I do like FutureLearn courses so I could do some random ones of those I've been trying to catch up on my backlog of reading which is helping some.
I didn't ask why he didn't want to see me. I wish I would have done. I just went along with it. Do you think it's worth asking for clarification on that for the crisis team?
Thanks for the support with the assessment everyone. It was a really brief one just explaining what emotional first aid was and if I wanted to go ahead with it so it wasn't really the place to talk about feelings etc, and we won't really do that at group either so if I want to do thst I'll have to self refer to counselling.
I'm feeling brighter today though because we've come to see my grandparents which is nice.
Jodie I'd love to see you lovely. I'll let you know when I'm back in London again.
You cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you wish to make.
I'm so glad to know you're feeling a little brighter, and that the assesment went okay. Sometimes, just being able to live and be aware of positive things in life is already an achievement. Hope you'll have more bright and positive days, you really deserve that.
I do think that it might be worth it to ask your crisis team to explain the situation with your psychiatrist. It is a little confusing and I think they might be able to make it clearer.
Also, do you still wish to see your psychiatrist? Would you consider referring yourself to councelling?
Yeah, I think it's definitely worth asking for clarification from the crisis team about why the psychiatrist didn't see you. It sounds like counselling as well as the skills group might be helpful for you; what do you think?
I like Lio's idea of a goals/tasks list- I remember Finn using a good app/website that was a bit like a game where you were able to assign points to various different tasks; maybe that would be worth looking at *summons Finn* (If that is unsuccessful I will just ask him and get back to you with the name of it!).
I can appreciate feeling worried about work's response, but when you think about it from outside of your situation, in general, how do you think your colleagues would respond to someone experiencing mental health difficulties?
Hah Habitica seems really cool! My avatar can even be in a wheelchair! I had my first emotional first aid group today which I think could be quite helpful.
I'll ring thr criisis team tomorrow about the appointment so watch this space peeps!
Jenna you're right but it's just that self-care is so important I'm just worried that my colleagues faith in me might be eroded.
Last edited by Moonlight Princess : 12-12-2017 at 11:17 PM.
You cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you wish to make.
Glad your first group session went well, hope it continues to be useful. It must be hard being concerned about how your colleagues might react to things, I hope that you can put your needs first and take whatever steps you need to take.
I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
KiraniPanini you're awesomesauce, marvellously witty, lovely being that doesn't deserve to have such shouty berating thoughts bombard you <3 I know you said you felt thinking about how you've been in the past all got too much & you should have 'moved on' instantly but hold your horses one second lady. First of all, I directly argue with that first part, the horrible negative thoughts are grossly inaccurate and they take one neutral thing and like to grow, unchecked. They are horribly convincing thoughts that crowd out everything, but we've got your back, we're here to nudge them back in line. Thoze thoughts are mean and don't serve you with any best interest on their part (sorry, personifying the thoughts here, but know you know me well, how I like my metaphors). There's no shame to be had that they, in their persistence and weightyness, got too loud to ignore or counter. Secondly, I'd say actually you don't have to rush yourself to move on and suddenly be super duper dandy fine because you're not, and that's okay. Not you feeling rubbish part, but you needing some time and space part. Perhaps this is the window of time where you don't have to pretend and can get some support in place and not berate yourself for needing some breathing space. I think it's a good idea of yours to ask why the change in plan of seeing the psychiatrist.
I'm sorry to hear about the TEFL course, it sounded like you were an epic teacher that adapted to situations really well and had such a good rapport with them all. You can go back to it in the future my lovely, it sounds like you took on board a lot at once and maybe a goal is to decrease your number of goals/workload to get more of a balance maybe? Maybe replace with something that doesn't have commitment to lesson planning type tasks but more of a hobby? You're welcome at mine anytime, we have yet to reuptake our Pushing Daisies viewing!
Sending love your way. How are you feeling?
'What came first, the phoenix or the flame?'
'I think the answer is that a circle has no beginning'
Hah Habitica seems really cool! My avatar can even be in a wheelchair! I had my first emotional first aid group today which I think could be quite helpful.
I'll ring thr criisis team tomorrow about the appointment so watch this space peeps!
Jenna you're right but it's just that self-care is so important I'm just worried that my colleagues faith in me might be eroded.
Haha, I'm glad my summoning worked on Lana, even if not on the fabulous Finn! It's awesome that you can get a wheeled avatar =D
I'm so pleased that the emotional first aid group seems like it might be helpful.
*watches this space*
Have you had any contact with any of your colleagues? I'm sure your colleagues think that self care is very important, but also understand that it's so hard to practise what you preach!
Tonks - Reading your posts, it's like you're here in person! <3 Thank you for those awesomesauce words about me. Yes you're right and I guess nobody deserves them including me, but the harsh fact is they're there and they need to be managed now. I do feel a bit ashamed that I haven't managed to do to that by now, (which I know is unfair to me because there is absolutely no shame in struggling mentally) I just feel so ashamed and weak. And I don't want those feelings to trigger anyone -there's nothing to be ashamed of or any weakness in being ill, I just maybe could do with some support in dealing with those feelings.
Thank you for the invitation lovely, I would love to gatecrash again at some point!
Yep Jenna my colleagues have been wonderful and it's been really helpful for my MH to get back into the swing of things again. I don't think any of the staff counsellors are aware of what happened but maybe the supervisors are.
I work as a counsellor for Childline for those of you who didn't know :) I'm not not sure which supervisors know what though, one of the supervisors came in with a cough and said "You don't need a cold on top do you?" But on top of what? I don't think I want to enquire about what people know actually, it feels better to just things blow over with time.
I'm trying to apply for jobs but I'm just terrified and disheartened. I feel so inept. It feels like the only thing I know about myself is that I won't see this through.
You cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you wish to make.
Oh Kiran lovely, I’m doing a you and being a bit too late to the party but I just wanted to tell you how wonderfully thoughtful and kind and caring you are and how much the world needs people like you Kiran, we really do <3
"this is the room where you don't have to be brave"
