" my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never, never leave you during your times of trials and suffering. When you see only one set of footprints it was then that I carried you" you were carried out of are lifes into the next and when its my time to leave this life I know i will be carried into the next life with you.
I wish i had my world complete again.
'Can we protend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars, i could really use a wish right now' BoB
You should tell her. A lot of times people hide things from their therapists because they want their therapist to think well of them or want to be a "good patient," but it really just gets in the way of treatment, and no therapist worth trying to impress will think any less of you for being honest. Also, it's really common for SI to become a routine like you described, so it's nothing to be embarrassed about, and she's not going to think you're crazy. Your therapist can't help you with something she doesn't know about, so you'll get more out of therapy if you tell her more. It takes time to build trust with your therapist, and it's totally and completely normal to want to hide some things, but you should always try your best to be honest with her.
A good therapist won't think you're "crazy" no matter what you tell her (and a bad one isn't worth trying to impress anyway). A good therapist will probably understand why you feel the way you do, or at least recognize that there's a genuine and legitimate reason for it and accept it without judgement. She'll also understand about you being embarrassed to tell her, and about how hard it can be to feel like you have to keep it a secret. For a therapist to think their client is "crazy" makes about as much sense as for a medical doctor to look down on a patient because she's sick.
Last edited by ~invisible~girl~ : 29-11-2007 at 09:28 PM.
Reason: adding stuff
Emily
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Yes you should. A lot of times people hide things from their therapists because they want their therapist to think well of them or want to be a "good patient," but it really just gets in the way of treatment, and no therapist worth trying to impress will think any less of you for being honest. Also, it's really common for SI to become a routine like you described, so it's nothing to be embarrassed about. Your therapist can't help you with something he/she doesn't know about, so you'll get more out of therapy if you tell him/her more. It takes time to build trust with your therapist, and it's totally and completely normal to want to hide some things, but you should always try your best to be honest with your therapist.
yeah i want my therapist to think well of me.thats exactly how i feel.But i will try change my opinion because there is no point in continuing my therapy if im not honest.i will try to be honest with her!
It's really common for people to want their therapist to think well of them, and to try to gain the therapists approval by trying to seem "less sick" by hiding symptoms, etc. But therapists don't actually judge their clients by "how sick" they are, especially since a lot of things that people want to hide are actually very normal things. What actually makes a therapist feel good about the therapeutic relationship is for the client to be honest in therapy, and start sharing the things he/she was trying to keep hidden. So I know that you're embarrassed to tell your therapist about things, but she'll actually think well of you for telling her rather than for hiding it.
Emily
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(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.
I wish I could help you with that, but honestly, I can't even start a conversation about regular things that I'm completely comfortable talking about, so I don't think I'll be much help. Maybe you could print out this thread and show her it?
Emily
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(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.
Do you know why it makes you uncomfortable? I mean, I know that you're worried about what your therapist will think and stuff, but you were able to talk about it on here. Do you know what's different about talking to your therapist? The reason that I'm asking is not just for telling your therapist this one thing in particular, but more that if you can figure it out, then it might be something that you and your therapist can work on so that you'll be able to feel more comfortable talking to her about other things that might come up as well.
Emily
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(O.o )
(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.
Probably because here people don't know me whereas the therapist does.I mean here you can't judge me.She knows that i SI when im sad angry anxious depressed or want to focus and she thinks that i have so many feelings that need to get out.She thinks that i SI because i can't tell how im feeling because i can't let people know how im feeling and im keeping all these feelings inside and that's a way to let them out.you know what i mean??Now i can't tell her that even when i don't have some feelings like the ones mentioned above which is when i need to SI, i SI for no reason.thats why im not comfortable with telling her.
I'm not sure that is a quick fix, as it sounds like pretty much a basic trust issue rather than like something specific that could be changed, so mostly it'll just take time until you trust her enough to feel comfortable telling her things like this. Probably the main thing is just to push the limits of what you're comfortable with as much as you can, so then when she does react well (and she will) you'll start to trust her more. Also if you can maybe talk to her about what you said here - about how you're worried that she has a certain image of you now and you're afraid of what she'll think if you tell her something that doesn't fit with it - then that would probably help a lot. But mostly, a strong client-therapist relationship is a key piece of successful therapy that definitely doesn't happen overnight, and is more like one of the relatively long-term goals of therapy. And if your therapist is any good, she's working on helping you be able to trust her more too, even though you probably aren't even aware she's doing it.
At any rate if you come in and start talking about the nature of the therapeutic relationship and needing to be able to trust her more, I promise she'll be impressed :)
Emily
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(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.
Sometimes its easier if things are taken out of your control. For example, if the therapist knows about something, they can talk about it with you easiser than if they don know. They have ways of approaching subjects which feel less intrusive.
That being said, perhapps you could write it down and give it to her. Or ask for a note to be passed to her before your session. I have my theapists email and sometimes I feel better sending her an email of whats on my mind and we can then talk about it in the next session. (Im not very good at face to face conversatons)
But whatever works for you. its defo worth talkin abot as it may help yoou sort your mind out a little as to why you do it.
whould it be a good idea to write a letter to her and give it when i see her again?
That's what I did when I wasn't able to tell my therapist out front what was still going on. I was about to get released and knew I wasnt ready. So I wrote her this letter explain what was still going on and even things that she didn't know about...it worked for me! I wish you the best of luck!!!!
'Is this a bad dream or the best dream that I've ever had? What is waiting beyond the mirror, beyond the curtain, beyond what fades into the black...' -Chely Wright
thnx!well she has asked me to start a diary and write my feelings.so if i have something to say i will write it down and she will see it!!i hope its useful coz im not the person who can talk face to face i prefer writing everything down.
