The wonderful thing about psychiatry is its guess work and check boxes, and often quite subjective.
What are the traits that got you assigned BPD? I'm diagnosed bipolar with psychotic symptoms, but have run the gamut of diagnoses. Depression, anxiety, dissociative disorder, BPD (solely because I self harmed, a rather lazy clinician) and have been investigated for schizophrenia and schizo-affective disorder.
They decided I wasn't schizophrenic the first time by giving me a low dosage of a drug to see if it would help. I lied and said it did ( for "reasons", it paranoia) even though I was not taking it as ordered. The second psych said I wasn't because I was too self aware.
There is no concrete physical measurable indicators of mental health issues. They have theories as to which neurotransmitters are involved, as proved by medication effects, and a couple of interesting studies about brain activity and imaging, but no actual way of measuring these in a way to concretely link them to particular mental health problems.
Personality disorders are some of the most problematic, as you have said, they are based on maladaptive personality traits. Which when it comes to treatment and prognosis can be daunting, as personality is the core of self. But there are some therapies that may help restructure these traits to more positive incarnations.
My advice is read up on BPD, from a clinical perspective. Decide for yourself if it truly fits. If not, seek a second opinion. If it does, ask for referral to BPD specific therapy. As far as I'm aware, it requires a rather different approach than other issues, and tends to get dumped in the too hard basket because of this.
You are not your diagnosis. You are not the "BPD-person". You are a person who may have BPD. You are also a thousand other things. Your diagnosis is a name for a demon you have fought, will fight. It gives you an idea on what weapons you need in your arsenal to defeat it. Even if it continues to plague you, it isn't you. You are more than the sum of your parts.
I think we all go through some level of hating having a diagnosis, usually after a period of desparately wanting a name for what what ails us. I remember going through several periods where I hated it, as I felt it closed certain doors. Bipolar and psychosis are with me, they affect me daily to varying degrees. Sometimes actively and directly, other times the memory of them or others' knowledge or perception of the disorder inflicts the negative effects. Sometimes I'll play on it, and end up feeling ashamed for doing so. I now have a truce with it. I accept it but I try not to let it define me. And I try to fight the misconceptions of others whilst trying to keep my head above water.
Sorry if this sounds rantish, I think I went off on a tangent. But I think the core of what I'm trying to say is don't let the diagnosis get you thinking that's all there is to you, or to BPD.
On myself, I'm doing really badly at getting back on meds, which right now is problematic to say the least.
*safe hugs if anyone still wants them*
...I try to outsmart him, but somehow he knows,
Wherever I am, that f***ing dog goes... - Dog, Andy Bull
No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain we suffer, or inflict. - Amenadiel, Lucifer
Why is the path unclear,
When we know hope is near
Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear
~~Margo is my penguin 🐧!!! ~~
The wonderful thing about psychiatry is its guess work and check boxes, and often quite subjective.
There is no concrete physical measurable indicators of mental health issues. They have theories as to which neurotransmitters are involved, as proved by medication effects, and a couple of interesting studies about brain activity and imaging, but no actual way of measuring these in a way to concretely link them to particular mental health problems.
So very true Annie. In reality they don't really understand more than about 10% of what the brain actually does - and most of that is guesswork.
*safe hugs to everyone who wants/needs them*
Really down right now and would love to either hurt myself or die. So frustrated about not being able to get out of this damn wheelchair and uni is just about to start back again. Feeling extremely overwhelmed and completely unable to cope.
I'm just going to hide and cry myself asleep again tonight.
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
Yup (to the Annie bit). I'm a bit off. Terrible day at work. But on the bright side I remembered meds
*squidges Kahlia and Mark and Ashley and anyone else who wants it*
Placement is looming. Homesickness and warmth and learning and assignments. Need to find my hinges before I go.
...I try to outsmart him, but somehow he knows,
Wherever I am, that f***ing dog goes... - Dog, Andy Bull
No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain we suffer, or inflict. - Amenadiel, Lucifer
Why is the path unclear,
When we know hope is near
Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear
~~Margo is my penguin 🐧!!! ~~
Man I'm anxious . Can I think of a constructive way to calm the anxiety? Nope.
I cannot focus man, BPD can Sod off and take my Chronic Depression and Anxiety with it .
I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones
It's okay , they know me here .
Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)
''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"
I'm just popping by. Not been on the forum in a long while. GP just prescriped me 50mg Trazodone on top of Fluoxetine, for sleep and anxiety. I take fluoxetine in the morning and trazodone at night. I feel groggy during the day but this might wear off. Can anyone give me their experiences of whether the grogginess wears off eventually during the day? I have been on it a week tomorrow. thanks.
It was exhausting and Damn well pretty useless . I origionally went to my GP , He told me it was a Psych Issue go meet the CMHT . Went To the CMHT , was told it's a Physical issue go meet my GP . Also explained to to CMHT , who did ask what's wrong , all about my anxiety including phone and public transport Anxiety and was given phone numbers to call and told to get the bus to another town to attend mindfullness class , despite having said I find it very hard to use the phone and impossible to get on a bus . . . . so yeah useless , Plus the fact their were 2 of them and the CPN Acted like everything I said pissed her off.
How are you all?
I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones
It's okay , they know me here .
Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)
''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"
Everything is going really well at the moment, I am finally giving up a few things that was causing me problems and trying to have a healthier lifestyle. Academically everything is going fine, I passed my third module with the Open University and I am going to be starting my 4+5th module in October this year and I am waiting for my passport to be signed and processed so I can get the funding done for the next two modules.
I am also doing an a-level in English Language and Literature for something to keep myself occupied.
I am still doing a lot of jobseeking at the moment and I am currently filling in the main NHS jobs form, however i am stuck on the supporting information section.
My mental health is very so-so at the moment as I am little stressed with a few things and I am constantly anxious. But I am taking things slowly.
Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just crazy. Maybe it was the 60's. Or maybe I was just a girl... interrupted.
I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside. I tried groups, didn't work out just made my depression a lot worse.
I am having such a had enough of everything kinda day i am so tired after my week, yet i cant seem to rest and relax. I feel so bored, done the playing games, used a computer, colouring and all the pointless distractions
Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just crazy. Maybe it was the 60's. Or maybe I was just a girl... interrupted.
I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside. I tried groups, didn't work out just made my depression a lot worse.
I'm miserable.
We put our boy (dog) to sleep on Friday. I left on Sunday. I haven't done my assignment. I don't want to do my assignment. It was due midnight Monday.
I don't want to be up here. I don't want to be home. I just don't want to exist right now.
...I try to outsmart him, but somehow he knows,
Wherever I am, that f***ing dog goes... - Dog, Andy Bull
No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain we suffer, or inflict. - Amenadiel, Lucifer
Why is the path unclear,
When we know hope is near
Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear
~~Margo is my penguin 🐧!!! ~~
