I actually disagree with a lot of what my medical history probably say, (probably since things have tended to be added in without me being informed -_- ).
I have no idea what's in mine. I'd be afraid to even ask, god knows what they make of me. I remember once literally giving a one word answer and the doctor sat there and wrote pages...and I was like wtf? What could he possibly be writing from a one word answer?! I think I'd rather *not* know...
I know this from both sides, and I know it's not all about me, but I'm gonna write anyway. Before I was diagnosed, I wanted like this proof that I could tell people "look I have xyz, it's not my fault I do whatever"but then I got the last diagnosis I ever expected, hadn't even considered and now I feel I'll never be taken seriously with this, anything I say can be written off as a delusion etc, I didn't believe the diagnosis for 10 years, and even denial is a symptom! Apart from the stigma (I just don't tell people though) I just know, well I just feel I'm no longer credible. But I just keep my head down, stay low and don't talk much about the thoughts. I also hate to ever blame things on it, it feels like an excuse, when really I'm just, just a bad person.
So there you go, another of my pointless posts...
Your post wasn't pointless, thanks for sharing. I think I'd be scared to push for a diagnosis in case I got one I really didn't agree with and that I thought would make me not be taken seriously. I've seen you around a lot, and have never had any sort of thought that you are a bad person, I've thought the opposite in fact.
Oh god I want to hear you say,
I want to hear you say that you were wrong again
This is the first thing
I have understood:
Time is the echo of an axe
Within a wood.
Hmm I kind of reject the idea of labels/diagnosis as well, but at the same time I have this obsessive need for classification(I blame it on the *suspected* ASD), so I, uh, know a tad too much about diagnostic criteria in the DSM-IV and DSM-V.
Also, as I have had a distinct feeling of 'not belonging' for most of my life, I thought that getting a diagnosis would make me 'fit in' somewhere(it did actually, it made me fit in here), and I also had this feeling that if I had a diagnosis, I could say 'hey! I'm not crazy! No, sir, not crazy, in fact, I've got an illness, I'm just a person like everyone else, but I am ill.'
Now, after being diagnosed with Recurrent Depression and BPD more than once(long story, moved to another country, lost files, had to be re-diagnosed with everything, even thought I didn't meet the criteria for BPD anymore, turns out I was wrong), idk what to think, as both diagnoses seem to have become second nature; it's like they're part of me now, and I wouldn't be myself without them.
ETA: I forgot to say, there is ONE reason why I actually think diagnoses can be useful, namely the very reason why I keep pushing for an ASD diagnosis(it's a very lengthy process): everything is label-based, therefore, more than often, you don't have the diagnosis equals 'we can't help you because you're not *really* ill'. Which is bullshit, is you ask me but currently things are like that...I have been refused support before because of this, and I really don't want it happening again.,,
I have a diagnosis according to the ICD - Ice Cream Desserts.
Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson "I hear those voices that will not be drowned" Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
I was diagnosed with depression at 18, but I'm pretty sure I have Borderline Personality Disorder and maybe even PTSD... I'm trying to get into therapy to get a diagnosis and hopefully medication to mellow my brain out.
"We accept the love we think we deserve."~Perks of Being a Wallflower
"Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or lose."~Lyndon B. Johnson
“Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.”~William James
“you can, you should, and if you’re brave enough to start, you will.” ~Stephen King, On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft
as much as I go back and forth on the idea of labels it's sort of helped me understand myself so..
Major Depressive Disorder [which I rejected because I was 12 when I got that diagnoses and I find that absurd]
ASD with OCD traits [though the OCD sort of melts into everything else as well]
BPD
GAD
psychosis [goes with the BPD]
eating disorder
a dissociative disorder
“Because everything that goes around comes around. Maybe it's luck or maybe it's fate, but either way, it comes back around."
Rest in Love Sar-sis. I'll see you the next time around hopefully <3 12/11/92-05/18/16
AJs mommy ❤️ 11/26/17
Married to my best friend and Soulmate 3/5/18 ❤️💍
Me I'm one of a kind unique . Little bonkers at times but who wants to be sane all the time. I live in my bubble with flying unicorns and pink skies but I do like the idea of cake diagnosis .
I have anxiety issues, OCD, and a history of depression.
I'm "disabled", in supported housing for adults with mental health problems looking to become independent (awaiting a place of my own), and receive financial support from the government.
I have a history of self-destructive behavior, which, for the most part, I completely overcame years ago.
My OCD comes in the form of perfectionism, intrusive thoughts, and occasionally stuff typically targeted by the media, minus contamination, 'though I do sometimes get obsessive about the cleanliness or organsation of things.
My anxiety comes in the simple package of health and social; yay. The OCD makes me anxious as well, so the two play roughly with each other; typically the way.
My depression is in the background, for the most part, and sometimes I'm not even sure I'm still depressed, since I'm not doing drastic things anymore.
I think, honestly, I'm doing well.
This is where the deep, meaningful signature goes.
There hardly is any true "mental illness". What there is is "emotional illness" that pulls the mind down into its own machinery. Most problems have the same root cause and are not as different as they seem. I'm not diagnosed with anything, but have the same root issues everyone has but haven't been too sabotaged by. I fade in and out of awareness while driving. I have imaginary conversations with people in my mind. These are considered "normal" but are actually dangerous at the root. Everyone is a little psychotic. Heck people "fall" in live (vs rising in it) and then look back and wonder "What was I thinking?". That's why ancient Greeks thought falling in love was akin to madness lol. Its very easy to get lose between the ears when emotions/ego get involved.
This thread is making me feel uncomfortable. People are being personal and it's coming from a newbie that hasn't posted before or since. I think that someone should take the time to know people before posting highly personal questions.
Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson "I hear those voices that will not be drowned" Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013