That's not what I meant when I asked if he was drunk. I just meant that sometimes people say things they don't mean when they are drunk or think they feel things when they don't.
I had a guy tell me he wanted to marry me once while he was drunk. Needless to say, the next day when I text him, he didn't have a clue who I was.
I'm sorry that you misinterpreted why I asked if he was drunk. Although I do realise I just asked that question and didn't explain why I asked it after you said he doesn't drink.
I haven pr read the whole thread but his change ability overnight could be that he had been hoping for sex. Men will say any old bull just to get someone into bed.
Or he could have just changed his mind. I guess it happens.
It's better though to not sleep with men straight away though ither isle yeah they want to see you again but they're only coming back for sex, unless that's what you want too. X
It's ok Cat, it's just that my nurse asked me did he go out in pubic with me and I feel like an ogre or something.
I asked him in the texts about sex and that if he wanted to call some night and talk about it then he was welcome and he just ignored me so I don't think it was that. I'm just going to be alone for the rest of my life, I may as well face up it. I've no friends either so not only am I unattractive, I'm also unbearable.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
To be honest, he sounds pretty immature. At least from what you've said.
And it seems like you are desperate to be liked. That's not a bad thing in itself but it doesn't seem like you've got much support. (Family, from your nurse, in your schooling, friends) it just doesn't appear that you've got anyone around you who really likes you. And I don't get the idea that you much like yourself either.
Everyone needs to be liked, at least by someone. And you've gotten used to no one doing it so when you get a hint of it and that gets taken away, that must be so hurtful.
You have a lot of good qualities and I'm sure that you will have friends and an actual romantic relationship one day. I am sorry it didn't work out this time. But I am fairly sure it had nothing to do with you.
Everything you say is true. I get grief and hatred from everyone and every once in a while I almost make a friend or have a guy then it falls apart. I don't know what else to do about it. I'm like a receptacle for negativity. I hate myself because of the way people treat me. I can't barely leave the house for people passing comments at me, it's pretty bad. I had abuse online then recently where someone I thought liked me told me to blow my brains out and when I reported them I was the one banned.
This one man I met showed me affection and then out of nowhere ignores all my attempts at communicating. It feels very unfair.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
Honestly, from how you described him even from the first post, this wasn't truly a nice guy. And that's not your fault. I believe if someone jokes about serious topics such as mental illness, disability, etc, they probably don't experience the best attempts at understanding and they probably say horrid things. Both these things seem to ring true eventually for people like that.
I honestly do not believe it has so much to do with you as it does him. If you had to question hiding your medications and large parts of yourself for him to keep him "normal", that's usually a red flag that someones not going to treat you as you deserve to be treated.
But I'm not cursed, I'm not cursed
I was just covered in dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt.
Massive red flag alright with the MH thing. The fact that I texted him loads to try to understand and he can't even answer is pig ignorant. It doesn't stop it hurting though. I think he just pretended the whole time he liked me. I know it wasn't a relationship and I am going on a bit but this is symptomatic of consistent repeat things which have nothing to do with my behaviour. I told him very little about myself and was very positive around him and didn't sleep with him which is unlike me.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
If I told someone I wasn't interested and they kept texting me that would just be one more reason for me to ignore them. People DO have the right to not explain why they don't want to be with somebody, I think you need to respect that instead of asking him continuously. For your own sake too.
That said, I understand wanting to know and struggling to let go. Whatever the reason, it's difficult dealing with such a situation. Especially since he said he liked you before.
Maybe you need to work on liking yourself rather than trying to be liked by someone else. If you enjoy your own company the desperation to have someone else might decrease. Do you want to talk about what makes it so hard for you to like yourself? I find you talk about yourself in a negative way a lot, and I really can relate to how much of a struggle it is to accept oneself and be happy with who you are. Remind yourself that not having a partner says nothing about you as a person.
I think it's leading someone on and then ignoring them. It's not on and they don't have a right to hurt someone needlessly. It's pretty hard to like yourself when everyone treats you like dirt. Where is the positivity going to come from? I went out with someone recently who never made me feel this way so I know it's not me. I haven't showered in three days and I am depressed as anything over this. I have been out with tonnes of men and this one should not have treated me this way.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
Yes, my nurse says everyone on the team likes me and why do I keep saying nobody does. My family would be very abusive and insult me quite a lot and my past partner was violent and an alcoholic so it hasn't been easy. I get a lot of people shouting at me in public and stuff too.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
Can you try listening to the people saying positive things more than to people who are abusive?
I know it's hard and I'm sorry to hear you have been treated so badly by so many people.
I'm sick of putting myself out there. I will need more counselling probably. I just can't believe how perfect the dating was going bar that one comment from him and then he never wants to see me again. I just need to get over it but it's so hard to find a compatible partner these days. It's nearly impossible at my age to find someone.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
Going doing my Master's and maybe having coffee with new friends, my job being made permanent, my family situation improving, getting my meds sorted and losing weight. My poetry doing better, I'm published but it's not been going well lately. A better social life and somewhere nice to live that's not too expensive. I suppose I use finding a man as vindication of myself as a person without the inherent need of my own self to be fulfilled alone and non dependent and the need to be seen as 'sexy' and 'attractive' by someone. Looking for love from men I barely know in order to redeem a broken past that needs fixing regardless. I hurt very deeply and think if I have someone I will fix it. I hate being single though, I love cuddles and kissing and talking to someone.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
It's hard to be lonely, I can relate to feeling isolated and how much it hurts.
What steps can you take to reach your goals?
I think it's important to remember that your self esteem will always be unstable if it depends on external factors. Feeling good about oneself should be regulated internally so that external events can't shake it too badly. It's easier said than done though.
What are things you like about yourself?
One thing I noticed is that you seem to be artistic and write. That is pretty great in my book, and nobody can take that away from you.
I know I'm not stupid intellectually and I am articulate. I'm a trained chef and studied Art and English ect. I have nice hair I suppose. I am sympathetic and caring and offer love to too many so I always get hurt. I'm a giver so that makes me hurt too. I make people laugh a lot in a funny kind of way. I am not all bad but I get no love from anyone and this aggravates my MH issues and drives me insane. It's boiling down to the way people treat me, I can't cope with it anymore. I'm also seriously ill and have no help from anyone which doesn't help matters. I don't hate myself but I suffer a lot with reflective comparisons from individuals.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
He spoke to me today and said he couldn't see us having a relationship but that he's not seeing anyone and had no dates since. He was really nice and wants to call to chat some day. I accpet that I won't be his gf and maybe we can be mates or something. I realise now I sent some hysterical texts and that's why he didn't answer. I need to calm down. He doesn't like me so I have to move on. He definitely has commitment issues though.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
It became like a sort of prison. Encased in a silver shell, words so full of bleeding need spilled like drops on dry leaves. And all the while laughter prevailed a long way from here. Nowhere land, nowhere time, nowhere space.
