Personally I think this could be really useful. I spend way too much time googline/IMDB'ing genres like horror/thriller/dramas to see if they contain anything i am going to not be able to watch.
I realise we all have personal responsibility, and everyone has different triggers and obviously a thread couldnt cover EVERYTHING but I think the main things like sexual violence/abuse or other kinds of abuse or things like self harm and suicide which are all the most common triggers would be quite useful. Plus, coming to check out a thread like this IS taking responsibility, just as checking google - its just perhaps a little quicker/more sensitive.
Not everything will trigger everyone, but for example I find a particular method of suicide extremely triggering and would ruin a perfectly great film for me if I werent expecting it... if I came to look at a thread and saw that the film i am wanting to watch has themes of suicide in it I will know to be extra careful/not watch... or if i really wanted to watch i would research further into what kind of suicidal themes it has.
There are obvious films like GWTDT that most people know have triggering themes, same with something like Girl Interrupted. But there are some films I have watched recently with self harm themes in them which I found quite shocking because I had no idea what to expect and a google search didnt warn me about it.
I am rambling now, but my point is I actually think a thread like this could be a good idea, as a way of us looking out for each other as opposed to bubble-wrapping. It is a choice whether you look up the thread at the end of the day, and what is the harm if simply seeing the words 'just watched *insert title here* and it has some graphic self harm/suicide/abuse etc etc scenes in it' and deciding to avoid something that could ruin a perfectly good evening?
Personally I think there should be an entire site dedicated to it, not just a thread.
I like to know if there are going to be scenes of a sexual nature in things, when it is not a consnsual act.
For example, I watch law and order - I know there will be distressing topics so I only watch when I'm well enough to deal with it.
But we went to see Frankenstein and there was a really graphic rape scene that I was a not expecting, cue flashbacks and trauma re emerging, had I been informed of this before hand I could have either not gone or gone in prepared. L
I don't see it as cotton wool i see it as informed and educated.
There's a line that would be crossed if you started trying to sensor things like, contains the colour red, and the like. But for sexual violence I think there should be a way to find out if a film or programme contains it before going to see it, as it's shocking to watch even if you haven't been through a. Trauma
Personally I think there should be an entire site dedicated to it, not just a thread.
Then why not make a site yourself with input from others, dedicated for that alone? Working as explained on here or similar?
Why is it the responsibility of ryl?
Id say its probably easier for other people, not connected to ryl, in general, to find it and would make more people benefit from it. Im sure many people find certain things triggering without having anhistory of self harm.
Personally i find it odd that people on here tend to focus on sexual abuse as triggering and self harm. Physical stuff. As an abuse victim both in sexually but also physical abuse, maybe even more so physical non sexual though, i find certain things such as domestic abuse to be triggering at times. But more than the violence i react to the psychological abuse that it also consists of.
And honestly, its hard to find a film not including violence these days. I guess, ijust really cant see where the line goes. Because then i dont react to what can be seen as "normally" triggering stuff but i react to certain things being said and so on. Tbh in spite of having been a victim in some horribly violent situations i quite like violent films, music, books and so on. Macabre murder, torture and i love horror films with kids involved because thats creepier even though that often means horrible things has happened to the kids. Rape scenes doesnt bother me nor does violent scenes. Again, its the psychological factors i find triggering. And those appear in many films without me being able to prepare for it or being listed on the back of a film or whatever.
My mum who has experienced no abuse cant stand watching films and scenes in films i really enjoy. Everyone has personal limits and who knows where those start and stop? You say making aware of obvious triggering things but i cant help but think that these are obvious and normal TO YOU where my triggers i see as normal and obvious. I feel that a list like that could go on forever and ever. It seems that your list is only really to avoid the triggers that appears from physical abuse and so on where i think a lot of people are triggered by non physical stuff. And for your list to be fulfilling, youd really have to go through a shiit load of films because people watch old films on tv all the time. Its not just new films.
I guess from how i see it, considering that people find different things triggering it should probably have most films in it with different descriptions of what the particular person found triggering. What situation, what it in olved etc. Which would in itself be a spoiler. Because why is people getting triggered by rape any different than a person getting triggered by their extreme fear of clowns because there is a clown in the background in one scene.
This list would be based on what you find triggering, not what actually necessarily IS triggering. what if people find unusual things triggering? Would it still go on the list?
I dont think there is anyway this can be fulfilling anyway. I guess its obvious you dont watch an american action film if you find shooting triggering, that you dont watch a film with giant spiders if spiders trigger you and so on. But even with a list like this, you could end up in the same position because there is no way you can safeguard yourself other than by not watching films, tv series and so on.
Also, why not make a book list as well. And one with tv series with each episode with triggering content and the second they appear. Or maybe a list of all songs including anything offensive or possibly triggering. Or stay in your home in fear of experiencing anything triggering.
I get how it is experiencing things like this but i also think that there are ways to find out these things already and that even how many lists made you still risk ending up triggered.
Personally i get flashbacks from certain words being said in certain ways. I know there is no possible way to avoid or be prepared for that except isolating myself so i work on ways to cope when they do appear. And that is not an easy thing but if i never get triggered, i will never learn to cope with those situations in healthy ways. And that is coming from someone who almost died from a suicide attempt done in a flashback before anyone tells me i clearly dont know how hard and dangerous it can be.
Anyway, though i am against the whole thing in general because i dont think anyone can really deem what is triggering and what is not because thats as different as the people, i think that if you feel tehre should be an entire site for it, make it. But it is not the responsibility of RYL.
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Kan ikke eksistere blandt ufuldkomne
Its a lot easier to go in and say whether it is recommended under a certain age or not than take everyones personal triggers into account, which a list like this would kinda have to do to be fullfilling. My point is, where does the line go? Who decides what is obvious triggers and should therefore go on the lidt when triggering things are individual. What if someone finds scenes with raccoons triggering because their beloved cat was killed by one? Should that go on tje lust when thats possibly more triggering to that person as sexual abuse.
Tbh, films noemally have rather good guidelines as to whether they have violence, sex, abuse and so on in them and an age of the viewer which is deemed suitabke. I dont think it can really be any more specific without it getting personal. They have already warned against the rhings most people find unpleasant. After this, it becomes a matter of the individual. And you cant really list every trigger a person might experience. Its impossible. With a list like this, you are still not guaranteed you wont experience triggers. And i guess i dont see how a list like that will not get endlessly long unless you somehow decide what triggers are most important and normal and leave the others out which could be upsetting and making the people who will not get the triggers they have, feel unimportant and wrong and different. I dont see how it could possibly be fullfilling without going through a hell of a lot of films. Hollywood films, foreign films, tv productions and so on. It seems like there is no end. And today, people just as much watch tv series which should also be trigger warned then as well as books and music and sites on the internet and so on.
In the end, triggers will occour whether you have a list or not. You can steer fairly free from films that might trigger you by using the guidelines already made. If you feel vulnerable, maybe go see a comedy. Because even with a list, you may find a film that others have deemed sage on the list, triggering. And you may be even more taken aback by it if youve been told its safe.
Triggering is a subjective thing therefore a list like this will be too, so you cant really count on it anyway without going into detail of the deemed triggering scene. Which would also spoil.
You could miss out on films youd love and not find triggering because someone put it on the list and you could still end up triggered because another person may gave listed a film tgat has ypur personal triggers in as safe.
Take for example, i find pregnant women and infants extremely triggering. But a film like knocked up would not be listed as triggering to the majority of people but to me, it is. So who decides if it goes on the list or not. Because to ne, it truly is triggering. But at the same time, i dont find an "obviously" triggering scene like the rape one in the girl with the dragon tattoo triggering in spite of gaving been a victim of sexual abuse. I really like the swedish version of that film but had i been told that its extremely triggering, i may have missed out on it in spite of the fact that i dont find it triggering at all.
I just find it hard to see hiw it would actually work and not just end up limiting what people can watch further while still not guarantee avoiding triggers.
Added: excuse the typos. Am on my phone and dont gave the energy to correct them all.
Last edited by Morpheus : 09-10-2014 at 11:31 AM.
Den fuldkomne kærlighed,
Kan ikke eksistere blandt ufuldkomne
In the end, triggers will occour whether you have a list or not. You can steer fairly free from films that might trigger you by using the guidelines already made. If you feel vulnerable, maybe go see a comedy. Because even with a list, you may find a film that others have deemed sage on the list, triggering. And you may be even more taken aback by it if youve been told its safe.
Triggering is a subjective thing therefore a list like this will be too, so you cant really count on it anyway without going into detail of the deemed triggering scene. Which would also spoil.
You could miss out on films youd love and not find triggering because someone put it on the list and you could still end up triggered because another person may gave listed a film tgat has ypur personal triggers in as safe.
I think that most people would know though, if they are feeling vulnerable, to try and avoid films which triggers may arise. I think the point of having the thread would be that sometimes triggering themes pop up when you least expect them and could ruin an otherwise fun evening.
Knowing about possible triggers in advance helps the person make an educated and informed decision on whether to watch it or not. Ultimately it is still their responsibility what they watch, the thread would just make making that choice a bit easier.
I think the thread is a good idea.
How can the light that burned so brightly
Suddenly burn so pale?
But what subjects are deemed triggering? That is the problem. Anything could be deemed triggering by someone. Who is to choose what and what not to put on the list?
As i said, what triggers is subjective ergo will a list like this become subjective and therefore not have much to go on anyway whitout every scene being described in detail what the triggering part consists of. And by that, spoiling parts of the film and perhaps other films as well that wouldnt have triggered you and you werent concerned about because they are also on the list and described in detail.
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Yes, everyone has different triggers, tahrs understandable and there is no way to accommodate everyone but the big issues such as physical violence (mainly centred on 1 or a small group of people) , sexual abuse/ violence (it doesn't necessarily have to be as far as a full rape scene), domestic abuses (inc psychological abuse), self harm, suicides and ED behaviours are the main ones.
There are a LOT of films which don't contain violence that you can watch but these may still contain some of this stuff and if it's psychological abuse there may not be a warning on the box. I see no reason why a thread can't be on RYL but it has to have the most common things on and really a tick box sort of system and if it helps people then maybe say if rape/ suicide/ similar is actually seen or just left for the audience to realise. Whatever the thread has it's not going to satisfy everyone. Without reading a whole script you're not going to know if it has words in it which are going to trigger you etc. it's not meant to be something that will satisfy everyone though and contain every trigger as that's not possible, just something which will be adequate for the masses. It's rare that you'd walk down the street and see someone getting raped but certain words coming up in a sentence may get more likely (I can't say whether it will be or not as I don't know the words involved) and so you do need to learn to cope with it more in real life.
The other thing you can do is ring up the cinema and say 'does x contain a scene with y?' And hopefully if they don't know they can if d someone that does and it'd lead to an answer that doesn't give away the whole plot.
I'm surprised this has been such an issue. As Cam said if the thread were just created I bet none of this would ever have come up, and it's certainly not breaking any rules.
Seems funny to me to have a thread "songs about self injury" but not want a thread with warnings about rape or suicide. Just keep it simple, a defined range of topics not "a list of everything you could find triggering in movies". Yeah things are subjective but a quick reference guide here is better than nothing.
I'm surprised this has been such an issue. As Cam said if the thread were just created I bet none of this would ever have come up, and it's certainly not breaking any rules.
Seems funny to me to have a thread "songs about self injury" but not want a thread with warnings about rape or suicide. Just keep it simple, a defined range of topics not "a list of everything you could find triggering in movies". Yeah things are subjective but a quick reference guide here is better than nothing.
This. I think it is very obvious that not EVERYTHING that EVERYONE on ryl finds triggering can possibly be included and I don't believe that is even what Jenna meant when she started this thread. It only needs to be general.
It isnt breaking any rules and would do no harm to anyone and its not like there is any obligation from anyone or 'responsibility' - merely a helpful thread.
I don't see why there is such a complicated debate going on tbh.
I don't see why there is such a complicated debate going on tbh.
Because people have conflicting opinions and are choosing to express them?
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I think this thread is good, allowing people to voice their opinions without being shouted down. If the OP didn't want opinions/discussion they wouldn't of posted here so I don't see what the problem is.
Also given that in the first post OP never asked about it being rule breaking etc thats kind of a non issue to bring up so I'm not sure why that is being brought up, it was asked if people thought it would be useful and not everyone thinks it is.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
im sure someone did or suggested making a similar thread in the past and it was removed as tip sharing because a lot of people reported it due to members being able to deliberately upset themselves.
although.. i think maybe that was a thread solely about films and programs with graphic self harming/suicide content.
im sure someone did or suggested making a similar thread in the past and it was removed as tip sharing because a lot of people reported it due to members being able to deliberately upset themselves.
although.. i think maybe that was a thread solely about films and programs with graphic self harming/suicide content.
Yes someone else remembers!It was that I think or there were a lot of threads focused on it or something!x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
^ see that is a perfect example of molly coddling. Also a perfect example of why personal responsibility is required.
For those of us who wish to take responsibility for our own mental well being and DO NOT wish to be triggered or deliberately seek it out, a thread like this could be quite helpful. As for people who do want to deliberately trigger themselves, I am sorry if this sounds harsh but that is their issue and responsibility and we aren't here to stop people doing that.
There is obviously going to be two sides to this coin and some may be of the opinion that, knowing some people will deliberately use it to upset themselves, should mean we do not have the thread. But this is supposed to be a pro-recovery site and therefore I think it is pretty pro-recovery to allow people to take personal responsibility in being able to find out if something is going to trigger them in a film etc that they want to watch so they can AVOID it or make their OWN decision about how to proceed.
